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Pinoys on the “Down Low”
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Are you a Pinoy on the “Down Low”?
What is the “Down Low” or “DL”? According to Ramone Johnson of About.com:
Men who discreetly have sex with other men while in sexual relationships with women are said to be on the “down low” (or “DL” for short). Often these men do not consider themselves gay or bisexual and their female partners are not aware that they have sex with other men, thus the term “down low” or “in hiding”.
Is this term synonymous to “in the closet”? Or, are all closeted men on the down low?
Not all men in the closet are on the down low. However, most men on the down low are in the closet. Men on the down low are usually in heterosexual relationships while secretly engaging in sexual activity with other men.
Who here among my readers are “men in the down low”? Please raise your hand!
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my highschool boylet crush na may wife ngayon, he is may be a down low. kc may anak na siya at wife. pero we did one night and he did liked it.
neon at Aug 19, 07 at 7:47 pm
Last year, I am. but now I am sober.
hustlingmind at Aug 19, 07 at 8:48 pm
I am Migs. Minsan kasi parang hinahanap lang ng katawan mo. Hehehe
luis at Aug 19, 07 at 9:02 pm
Luis, tell us more. Share ka. Or email me – manilagayguy@gmail.com
Migs at Aug 19, 07 at 9:23 pm
I always thought that “down low” pertained to those who are actually married, not just in a heterosexual relationship.
Vin at Aug 19, 07 at 10:27 pm
Meron palang term sa ganun? I have a friend who eventually, became my kumpare, kasi kinuha akong ninong niya sa bunso niya. Pero meron nangyari sa’min, of course, without the knowledge of his wife. Wala na kaming communication now.
nell at Aug 20, 07 at 1:16 am
down low, scared,ashamed,in-denial, closeted – they are all the same, just semantics. the question is- why so many of gay pinoys are like this? i think the gay community is reflecting what our society has become. ours is a timid, broken, confused, undisciplined culture without a compass. ours is a society where cheating, lying and corruption are the norm. it is also a culture that lacks cohesion within its citizenry; where the common mantra is: “it is okay as long as that makes YOU happy”. never mind the fact that what makes you happy (your dishonesty, lack of commitment and integrity) may eventually devastate the people you profess to love; be it your girlfriend, your wife, or your children. even more bizarre, our country is predominantly catholic and has one of the highest church attendances in the world. how do people reconcile their behavior with their faith, i wonder?
dyan at Aug 20, 07 at 5:26 am
I had sex with 2 cute straight/heterosexual boys now married and they are also my kumpare. The first is the campus hearthrob and my crush in college, the other one a ramp model. Both have a long list of gf whom they sleep with.I got them in their unguarded moments after that they liked it and we did it several times. They said it’s different, we’re good at it because we know the erogenic zone of the male body.
JM at Aug 20, 07 at 8:32 am
hmmmm….i had several experiences with DL. Ingat lang baka masampal ka ng mga asawa nila hahaha
pepe at Aug 20, 07 at 8:47 am
i first heard this term DL in oprah.
a guy wrote a book about his exploits while having a wife.
ironically they divorced and now everybody knows that hes gay. even his daughter supported his lifestyle.
i think i am a DL-material.
i have a gf and marriage is an option that i am contemplating.
nakakakaba lang..
eric at Aug 20, 07 at 10:24 am
yung kapit bahay ko na friend ko migs. may asawa na sya now at anak pero nagkikipag sex din sya sa gay minsan, hehe magkasama kami sa mga kalokohan eh.
WhoCares at Aug 20, 07 at 12:07 pm
I don’t know if i could consider my bestfriend a DL but we had sex a lot of times since last year when I eventually let him know that my feelings for him is more than that of a friend. May asawa siya at mga anak at may pagka-siga sa kanilang lugar. Ang dami rin niyang naging GF at flings before.Hanggang ngayon nga ay mahilig pa rin makipag-flirt sa ibat-ibang babae. Minsan siya nga mag-initiate ng sex between us. And we did it na hindi siya lasing so i know hindi yon bunga ng espiritu ng alak.
prichavs at Aug 20, 07 at 4:31 pm
This is the first time I heard this term. It’s interesting how society has forced these type of sex-cursions into hiding. I see nothing wrong with tasting every dish.
Jake at Aug 20, 07 at 8:02 pm
nakakahilo
chuchu caracas at Aug 21, 07 at 4:30 am
what if the guy is married back in manila and having his gay activities openly here abroad, will he be considered “down low”?
or simply bastard lier?…lol
kloga at Aug 21, 07 at 8:23 am
This term first came out from the black community. At least, entered public conciousness through them. So I it is sort of associated with black men. You will hear black women and comediennes lamenting that with so many black men in prison (prison sex), black athletes with white women, and now the down low, life is hard for black women needing male partners.
John at Aug 21, 07 at 8:45 am
when Blue Ave was still open, I met a few gorgeous looking guys who were DLs. They got married because they either got their wives preggy or they were extreme secretive of their sexuality. It’s a difficult situation to be in.
Kai at Aug 21, 07 at 11:09 am
ahh, so many terms in this world of ours. they’re too many of these terms, sometimes i think making these MAKES no sense at all.
if these terms just go away like that, there might be equality among us humans.
*sigh
Nadriamez at Aug 21, 07 at 1:26 pm
wala namang kasarian ang libog. me asawa ako kaya complicated pero nasa sa yo na lang yun, basta pag nahuli, kahit nakakandong na sa yo si kumpare, deny! hehehe. madaming interpretations pa kasi kung nagdeny ka kesa umamin agad, tapos ang laban.
hustlingmind at Aug 21, 07 at 11:08 pm
oh thats what it means. i thought it was another term for australia. stupid me. hehehe.
john_wee at Aug 23, 07 at 9:25 am
this guy “hustlingmind” seems interesting… ganyan ang gusto ko… risky masunod lang ang gusto…
gharyjohn at Aug 23, 07 at 12:17 pm
hustlingmind i second the motion ,,thats very just let it be and keep until you can.
dan253 at Aug 23, 07 at 3:20 pm
I am married with a daughter. There was this guy sa spa who was looking at me from head to foot and I assumed that he wanted to taste me. When nobody was inside the steam room and i was lying down, he approached me and asked if I could have a blow job. That was my first time and it felt ok and I enjoyed it. He got my number and for the second time it happened. For me, experience lang. Down low na ba yon?
akoito at Aug 23, 07 at 5:39 pm
eversince attracted ako sa mga married men,sana makatagapo ako dito
hehehehe, masyadong malakas ang appeal nila sa akin,
tobby at Aug 24, 07 at 9:02 am
Down low.
Cool verbiage
I’ve had at least a few guys on the down low. Who aren’t afraid to try guy when girls aren’t available or not on hand.
my yellow shirt is rumpled at Aug 24, 07 at 9:18 pm
I was, occasionally. It ended when my girlfriend and I broke up recently.
Carlos at Aug 24, 07 at 11:46 pm
sana maka hanap rin ako ng DL… hehehe
mark at Aug 25, 07 at 12:22 am
i think i am…i’ve had several sexual relationships with both men and women…as to romantic relationships, i’ve only had it with women…
ewan at Aug 25, 07 at 12:39 am
Kht ako bilib ako kay HUSTLINGMIND Just lyk me praktikal dn ako pgdating sa bgay na yan
Sentosapark at Nov 2, 07 at 11:28 am
obviously, im no man on the dl. anyway, i watched an episode of Oprah talking about the said issue, about men (black that is) in America on the dl. i don’t know of these are just tendencies of married men, but i think the type of career a person is in is a factor why such tendencies occur. i can say that some are afraid to be labeled as gay or whatever, so they consider the type of living they are in as a major factor… i don’t know, just thoughts on the issue.
pavl at Dec 27, 07 at 10:19 pm
Growing up, most of my sexual relationships are with men on the DL. I had this twisted notion then that gays don’t go or make patol to kapwa gays. Thankfully, maraming horny boys sa lugar namin.
All of them are already married and with kids, ninong pa ako sa ilan.
Mikey_Liling at Feb 11, 08 at 12:41 am
Hard.. yes.. i guess that is my current state.
locomotor at Jun 22, 08 at 10:52 am
Hard.. yes.. i guess that is my current state. its been a year and still i cant believe that i actually have a girlfriend..
locomotor at Jun 22, 08 at 10:54 am
well.. i think im a DL. hehe. but is it still a DL if you look for it sometimes? while you honestly and truly love your gf? i do… and i plan to marry her, its just that may tawag nang laman minsan. i dont know how to explain it. sigh. email me if you have any thoughts about it. shane_chan2004@yahoo.com. thanks.
chan at Mar 3, 09 at 10:07 am