Hi Migs, i discovered your blog two weeks ago when i started seeking for advise online. Please call me KUYA, i am 27 years old and working in a well-known company in ortigas, looks?not that good looking but many people find me sexy…(lol), i am into 4 1/2 years straight relationship and soon to be a loving husband.
I would like to ask something, i am seeking answers na hindi ko inakala sa gay community ko mahahanap..i mean hopefully mahanap.
I have adopted brothers they are twins actually, mula ng mamatay parents nila, kami na nag alaga, i was in grade school then (Grade 6), both are boys when their parents left them to us.Halos sa amin na sila lumaki, lahat ng merun ako merun din sila, my mom and dad treated them so well na as if tunay silang mga anak. I never wanted at first to be called as Kuya, i preferred to be called TITO instead…ewan ko bakit…time passed, halos nakikita ko na sila lumalaki…i was in highschool when one of the twins decided to move in my room, so roomates na kami nung isang adopted brother ko, i was 17 then at 9 years old na sila…the one who move into my room suddenly naging close kami, he wanna learned mga bagay ba alam ko(guitar, keyboard, drawings, etc), naging mas malambing xa sakin kesa sa isa nyang kaptid nya…we talked before going to sleep, he likes my choice of songs too…Sinamahan ko pa sila to have their ‘Tuli” and linisin ito everynight to heal.
College days na, since malayu college from our town, nagdorm nalang ako at madalang nako makauwi…bibihira na kami magusap, magkwentuhan, magbonding..pero pag umuuwi ako, i always make quality time for both of them, play station, malling etc…naging kuya ako sknila for all those years…but they call me tito as my preference.
after college, i got a job in manila, 7 days after graduation, nagwork nako, lalong naging madalang pag uwi ko ng province, never had time to communicate with them too…pero gaya ng dati, pag nakakauwi ako, i always make quality time. Tinutulungan sila sa homeworks, projects, etc..if they want anything, binibili ko nman no questions ask…what i noticed sa huling uwi ko of that month 4 years ago, parang sobrang namis ako nung isa(my roomate), na to the point nakakatulog na xa on my chest (na dati nya gngwa when he was a kid pa). I ignored it, hndi ko nilagyan ng malice yun migs kasi nga gawain nya nung bata pa siya…he was 14 years old that time.Sunday of that month 4 years ago, umuwi ako ng nakainum, inantay nya ko till 3:00am, hndi daw xa makatulog…sabi ko tabi nalang xa sa kma ko…which gnwa naman nya…i was tipsy but not drank that sunday morning, but i was totally exhausted and tired, kaya nakatulog kagad siguro ako, ng malingat ako, i felt my brother’s hand moving inside my shorts (i dont want to elaborate pa kung anu gngwa nya), pinalo ko kamay nya, yet he did not stop so i let him nalang…hindi ko na siya sinuway, maybe part of it, nagustuhan kona din…
After that, hndi na nya ako kinausap, for 4 years. 17 years old na xa ngaun, no matter how i tried to talk to him, hndi parin nya ako kiankausap, as if i dont exist. Hindi na nya kinkuha mga bagay bagay na binili ko para sknya(well i alyways buy in pairs, kasi kamabal sila), for the past four years, ganun trato nya skin… hinayaan ko lang migs…but last december of 2008,new year i tried to talk to him again and surpisingly, he responded. Signal na OK na kami…till now i always ask him why he ignored me for the past four years and what did i do to treat me that way…sagot nya?”Wala lang”…
for the past four years na hndi kami ng uusap, ni isa sa mga bday ko hndi nya ako binati, but this year, he texted me ” Happy Bday” with his name written…i asked him kung xa ba tlga nagtext nung message na un and he replied ‘yes” but he cant seem to look me in the eye…
nahihiwagaan ako migs, is my brother starting to like me???
one more thing, ngaun ok na kami ulit, napansin ko bgla akong naging sensitive sa mga nrrmdamn nya, i mean, parang lagi ko xa gusto i please…am i starting to like him too?
thanks…kahit anu maippayo mo tatanwin kong malaking utang na loob.