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Have you ever been sexually harassed?
Entry Feed TrackbackIt was late night, everything was quiet and we were driving around his neighborhood, I on the driver seat, and him on the passenger’s. While it was dark, I knew there were clouds hovering in the sky as no stars nor bright moon can be seen to provide that magic mood lighting.
John started talking about a particular experience back when he was still a freshman in college. In an org event he joined, he got introduced to a guwaping TV personality, let’s call him Larz, a new graduate of the same college in UP, also from the same org. Before even meeting Larz, John actually idolized him, perhaps even secretly adored him, but because he was not yet aware of his own sexual preference at that time, John did not really distinguish between the two feelings. They had a good chat in that event, and eventually exchanged digits.
One time, Larz invited John for a friendly tete-a-tete at a coffee shop in Katipunan.
“Coffee tayo,” Larz texted.
Without batting an eyelash, John replied, “tara!” It was, after all, his “TV idol” who invited, and who was he to decline?
For the most part of their Starbucks stay, they were just like any normal buddies — exchanging stories, laughing, teasing, etc. In short, nothing really noteworthy. Nothing, until this little weird twist. Larz casually invited John to accompany him to the CR. John did not know what to make out of the invite, he was kind of confused — male buddies normally don’t go to the CR together, right? — but he agreed anyway. He was his “TV idol,” trustworthy, and a buddy, so nothing — supposedly nothing — should go awry. Or so he thought.
Inside the CR, Larz unzipped and, while relieving himself, was conveniently exposing his family jewels for John to see. “Tingnan mo, kapal ng b*lbol ko no?” Larz joked with John. Again, John was confused. He felt very uncomfortable. He pretended he did not hear anything, and just looked away, as far away as he can, inside the minuscule place that is the CR.
Back to their Starbucks table, they continued the exchange of stories, as if nothing happened. Larz brought out his cellphone and started to show John his collection of video scandals. The straight kind. A short clip on a girl celebrity doing things she would never allow her mother to see. Another clip of a female starlet doing her thing with a then basketball star. And so on, etc. John feigned interest, since he knew straight men usually get all excited with these stuff. Larz did something extra though. He jokingly touched John’s crotch, “uy, nagre-react na ang alaga mo, hahaha!” While John kind of knew it was inappropriate, the only thing in his mind was, this guy was a good guy, he won’t do anything bad to me. Larz was his idol.
Later on, Larz who had a car, volunteered to drive John home. Of course John agreed. When they reached John’s boarding house, he did the most Filipino thing to do. He invited Larz over, “baba ka muna.”
In his room, John offered, “hey Larz, dami ko ditong kadiri na porn, piss fetish, sh!t-eating girls, baka magustuhan mo, hahaha!”
Larz responded automatically, “Kadiri! Patingin!”
While Larz was viewing the unusual photos, then started another round of suggestive teasing. There was more touching, more teasing, and John was caught unaware. Again, he was confused. But he thought wise to just ask Larz, “sige na, Larz, uwi ka na.”
Larz was decent enough to leave, and sugar-coated the hullabaloo with much humor.
While the story was being told, I was just quiet and nodding, acknowledging John’s feelings. I thought he wanted to share how he personally experienced an actual sexual harassment scenario. He said, “when I told this story to a female friend she said it was very clear harassment, but when I was in the actual situation, it was very fuzzy. Most of the time I was confused and did not know what was happening.”
I resonated with those words. When I myself experienced a similar situation, I felt the same confusion. In my case, I even felt guilty being harassed, thinking, did I do something to make him do that to me? It was a very negative, almost traumatic, experience. So, yes, I thought John was on the dot with that statement.
However, as I thought more about the scenario, a different perspective emerged. Was John totally a victim here? What other things can you see that may move us to interpret his story in a different way? What relevant nugget of learning can you get out of this story?
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In this case he just allowed himself to be a victim, or was he unconsciously wanting himself to be?
If it were me, I would have asked the guy right on, what his intentions are? If he reacted defensively or backs up (so not attractive) then it’s a no. If he reacts confidently and is attractive, then yes, he can rape. lol j/k
ono at Apr 25, 09 at 12:00 pm
The keyword there is CONSENT. If you’re not willing, if you felt somewhat violated, then that’s harassment. Unfortunately, John was giving out strange signals– he said that he felt uncomfortable yet he hitched a ride with the guy and worse, invited Larz to his home. Larz probably thought John was game (and probably even liked it) which was why he kept doing that.
Mavinlark at Apr 25, 09 at 1:16 pm
larz knew that john idolized him, so he took advantage of him. if larz thought john was game, why the need to project himself as straight by showing “for straight guy” scandals?
nojjer at Apr 25, 09 at 1:51 pm
in this situation, maybe larz was just the typical game and bubbly guy, playful and witty, there are guys like that but does not mean they are harrasing, also john mite be the one with all the malice and stuffs, so in his mind he mite be sexually harrassing himself situation and liking it so he continues the story in his mind thinking where it leads, but since the signals where to low, and oppurtunities where not really there thats why he cut his own fantasy with his tv idol short….
butterflyrhai at Apr 25, 09 at 1:52 pm
absence of dissent equals consent =)
patricklee at Apr 25, 09 at 2:00 pm
In the beginning, it seems like it were a case of sexual harrassment, especially when ‘Larz’ exposed himself to ‘John’, and also when ‘Larz’ felt ‘John’s’ crotch to check if he has a hard-on or not. But what’s confusing is why ‘John’ didn’t react like he’s not ok with it(perhaps he’s enjoying it? the attention, etc), and instead he had ‘Larz’ come over his room and even showed him his “porn” collection, with that he turned himself from victim, to aggressor/accomplice… by simply showing pornography to others can already be considered as sexual harrassment, so as guilty as ‘Larz’ is, ‘John’ is not exactly innocent either. In other words, he does not have any right to claim that he is a victim of sexual harrassment cause he himself is guilty of the same crime. Kaya ‘John’, wag na umarti… hindi bagay… hehehe.
carl at Apr 25, 09 at 3:30 pm
what if i really wanted to be harrased?and it developed into an addiction?if you have time do check my blog.http://www.bedtimetoy.blogspot.com,i’m sharing my experiences in here…wala kasi ako mapag kwentuhan.salamat.
bedboy at Apr 25, 09 at 7:26 pm
parng di naman siya na harrased dito,maybe the other guy wss trying but not succeed.
and besides,nasa kanya n yun pano siya magreact,sapakin nalang niya kapag obvious ng nagte take advantage hehe
on the other hand,i’ve been harrased inside a bus,i thought mandurukot siya kaya nagapang yun kamay niya sa legs ko yun pala iba ginagapang!
to cut the story short,pumayag ako i pretend i was asleep while he’s stroking me LOL!!!!!!!!!
macca at Apr 25, 09 at 11:55 pm
hahaha naputol pala ang name ko ako yun si macca!intended to be maccacallister,imbyerna!
maccallister at Apr 25, 09 at 11:56 pm
Myb sa sobrang idolized nia ky larz,nilagyan nia n ng malice. .playful lng tlga cguro c larz. .dming arte. .guz2 nia dn nman. .jejeje. .kulang lng ng consent yan. .
Rapidfire at Apr 26, 09 at 12:09 am
di ko nakita mali sa ginagawa ni “larz”, it was purely a matter of naughtiness, na nilagyan lang nya ng malisyah dahil ‘he’s idolizing him for life’ nga…
had john experienced it from a person he doesn’t like?..that way he would have screamed harassment….ayun nga…”negative plus negative equals positive”….meaningh gusto nyah, nilalagyan lang nyah ng burloloy para mas gumanda….o divah??..hehehehehe
mellicious at Apr 26, 09 at 12:45 am
wth! letting someone go to ur room tells something. kung something to drink edi sana sa sala. cmon John.. u liked it nmn din e. sa cr palang u gave signal. dont act as if u were harassed, may consent mo yan. e admire mo rin pala b4.. cmon so much details to tell u liked it!
dennis at Apr 26, 09 at 12:48 am
I must have very loose morals (but some of you already know that), but Larz basically sent out “feelers” to see if John is game or not. If I were to interpret John’s reaction to Larz’s feeler signals up to before he asked him to leave? New to the game but game none the less. Just means more hand holding is all.
If we break it down (1) he accompanied the guy to the restroom (sure, confused but STILL accomodated the request). (2) he didn’t immediately brush Larz’s hand away (thought bubble: jackpot!). (3)hitched a ride back home (here we go!) (4)invited him inside his house and room (right, hide behind filipino hospitality for this one). What is a horny gay man suppose to think? If he really didn’t want anything to happen he should have said at feeler number 2. A simple “I respect you man, but I don’t swing that way.” would have sufficed.
Tony at Apr 26, 09 at 2:47 am
it is not harassment. Larz was obviously trying to find out if John is game. That is all there is. If John doesn’t want the provocations he could just say no. Apparently Larz wanted to do it with John; harassment is not intending to do it with another. Harassment is displaying power by sexually cowing another. There is a difference in the intention between the two.
Lester at Apr 26, 09 at 7:00 am
yeah.. it’s sexual harassment..
rexy the sexy at Apr 26, 09 at 9:48 am
What a fake! Who would resist the chance to do it with TV personality whom you idolize? College freshman = raging hormones. Give me a break. The story is made up because:
1. John wants us to believe that he has “principles” and will not go to bed with just anyone even if it were a celebrity he idolizes.
2. John wants us to believe that he is attractive enough that even a TV idol made a pass at him.
Larz made a pass at John. That’s all. Sexual harassment? WTF. No such thing in this fairy tale.
ethan at Apr 26, 09 at 11:09 am
there is one thing nobody here seemed to take into consideration. the narrator said it happened when he was a freshman in college. so that makes him 16 or 17 at the most, right? whether or not he consented or not, legally, menor de edad si john; and larz is a recent college graduate (21-22?), which makes him a young adult. in the eyes of the law, the adult bears responsibility for his actions at yung menor de edad eh siyang nagiging biktima sa sitwasyong ito, regardless kung sumama siya, nag-imbita etc.
also, judging from the way john narrated his story, he’s a middle-class, still in his teen years then and yet to know “what is out there” and obviously leading a sheltered existence; whilst lanz is exposed to showbiz – a vipers’ pit where young isn’t exactly young, and innocence is a stuff of celluloid dreams.
methinks, regardless sa kabaklaang maaaring i-explore ni john, sa mata pa rin ng batas, ng kanyang psychological at sexual development, siya ay menor de edad who was taken advantage of by someone who seemingly is in his early adulthood, a stage where one has to bear more responsibility for what he does. and please, let’s put things in perspective… ENOUGH of the application of MALICE into someone else’s experience. ENOUGH of saying “lalaki ka naman eh, walang mawawala sa iyo”. pucha… harassment, sexual molestation, rape of boys or young adults who still have to get a grasp of who or what they are as far as their self-identities are concerned still is a “moral robbery”. MERON TALAGANG MAWAWALA kapag ang kabataan ay pinagsamantalahan.
the sooner all of us understand that, the better our collective lives will be.
palma tayona at Apr 26, 09 at 11:29 am
Hi! Everyone,
Important of Avoid the Sexual harassed:
1. To be control yourself
2. USe conservation communication through the sensitive.
3. Be wise and human are natural.
Ask did you inform about urself personal to him?
John Paulo S. Trinidad at Apr 26, 09 at 11:53 am
i was enjoying reading the various responses , when all of a sudden came …
John Paulo’s – sumakit ulo ko sa ‘yo, entertaining though… world peace
doc at Apr 26, 09 at 2:52 pm
I have been reading your blog and kind a amazed with all the writings and comments from the group connections. Its a strange that sexual harrazment occurs on that stage where in fact he didnt react the moment the guy initaited the unwanted acts from himself.
I guess he also likes the ways actions meant to be with hum, its a hypocrite base on the storyline he says…
kabul Guy at Apr 26, 09 at 3:28 pm
Whoa. Di ko maintindihan ung post na un. Grammar check? Hee. Speaking of harassment, I got harrassed by my uncle when I was 6. He would force me to strip in his room and he do things of horror to me. After that I never went to his house. I felt disgusted and I would cry myself to sleep. Back then I didn’t know it was harassment. I haven’t seen him since because he’s in the military. I wonder I he’s dead. Hee. It’s all in the past now but it still haunts me. To think that someone as close as an uncle, someone I trusted could do something like that. Hee. All I can say now is, I’m such a dumb kid back then and I think if people knew this about me, they’ll reject me…
seventeen at Apr 26, 09 at 3:40 pm
of all the comments here, sa isa lang ako nag-agree…
kay doc lang!!! hahaha, korek ka doc, napainom ako ng 3 advil ng mabasa ko ang response ni John Paolo!!! hahaha…
carl at Apr 26, 09 at 4:37 pm
well i was in a worse situation at a very young age i was harrased by my first degree cousin
i didnt know what to react..
during college a guy from the org hit on me and i almost fall for the pleasure it will give me….
for me its broad, it depends on what level or the extent that u were already been harrased, it depends on your tolerance if how far can u go or allow,, because it harrasment is when u dont allow or ur not comfortable otherwise u like the deed then its no longer harrasement,, ur being compliant…..
jason romero at Apr 26, 09 at 5:03 pm
this is no different from the story of nicole and that cute daniel smith….
u at Apr 26, 09 at 6:27 pm
Hahaha! I was wondering kung what school galing si John Paolo! I literally had to stop 5 minutes trying to untangle your words.
I got harassed during 4th year college while on a jeepney ride home as my Dad couldn’t fetch me. An older man who sat beside me up front was trying putting his hand up my thigh while making a kissing expression on his face. And to make things worst, the guy and I had the same stop. When I got off the jeepney, he was still there looking at me with a smirk. I immediately took a cab and had it go to a different village a kilometer away from my house, whuch was 500 meters only from the jeepney stop.
xoxo at Apr 26, 09 at 7:28 pm
Ang tagal ko bago maka recover matapos mabasa ung post na un ni JP.
totoo bang may mga taong ganyan? Nang-haharass sa bus at jeep? At ung mga sinehan sa Recto at Quiapo, totoong lugar ng kababalahan un? Haha. Sa U-belt area kase ako nag-aaral. Never ko pa na-try pumasok dun. At araw araw din ako nauwi sa Cavite. Di ko afford mag-dorm :p wala pa ko na-experience na ganyan. Kelan kaya? Haha. Peace everyone.
laddie at Apr 26, 09 at 8:16 pm
kaloka yung reply ni John Paulo, ANO DAW?!!!
Tips on leaving a reply/advice:
1. Siguraduhing hindi nalipasan ng gutom bago mag-reply.
2. Magbaon ng dictionary at thesaurus at all times.
3. Kung hindi parin ito makatulong, komunsulta na sa malapit na mababang paaralan at mag-enroll ulit sa Grade 1.
well yeah, I think this one is sexual harassment, kaya lang hindi naman ako lawyer and yung mga resources ko eh pertaining about sexual harassment in the workplace kaya medyo iba ata. Pero one thing naman is clear, if he feels uncomfortable or threatened dun sa mga “sexual advances” nung guy, kung saan nasa situation siyang feeling niya eh ” oi iba na to ah”, I think it puts it in sexual harassment and mga acts of lasciviousness. Hindi naman dahil sa tingin natin eh trip niya din yun eh hindi na sexual harassment yun. Bakit? ALAM MO BA NA GUSTO NGA NIYA YUN?
suki_mo at Apr 26, 09 at 8:54 pm
Based on studies, people who harass are people who have been harased. It’s a vicious cycle. Larz is definitely a victim of harassment when he was younger. As a victim, he has tendencies to become the perpetrator of a crime.
John was definitely a victim of harassment at his young age. Confusion is definitely apparent since things are not clear until now. He was a willing victim who could have easily stopped all advances or just gullible to allow these things to happen. It could have been worse.
Since I was a big guy in high school, I could pass as an 18 year old kid. One time when I was 14 or 15 years old, I entered an almost empty theater showing an R18 film. A gay guy entered the theater and sat beside me. He tried befriending me and started to touch my thigh and crotch. I never got excited. In fact, I literally froze with what he was doing to me. When I came to my senses, I stood by immediately and ran home.
A similar incident happened to my older brother but during his first or second year in college. A gay guy befriended him to and started to touch him. Before the gay guy could move to farther, my brother got his ballpen and hit the guy on his leg and ran out of the theater. Ouch!
Bong at Apr 26, 09 at 9:10 pm
Sorry for the typos and lapses. I didn’t re-read and edit. Hehehe!
Bong at Apr 26, 09 at 9:14 pm
Nang matuklasan ko ang aking sarili
Sa tayog ng araw, ako’y nagmuni-muni
Nangarap, nag-isip, at nagtanong
Paano haharapin ang bagyong sumalubong
Naalala ko pa noong aking kabataan
Ako’y naglalakad patungo sa bahay ng kaibigan
Hinatak ako ni Kuya sa malambot na higaan
Sa aki’y may hinawakan na hindi ko inaasahan
Mula noon, ako’y nagduda, ako’y napipi
Saan ako napapabilang? Babae o lalaki?
Sa tuwing hinahagkan ang aking sapantaha
Akin nang nararamdaman, pagluha sa mga mata
Isang araw, nagdesisyong mag-obserba
Sa mga kapwa ko lalaki, ako’y nagtaka
Ang mga kilos nila, bakit kakaiba?
Ang nakagawian, bakit hindi tulad sa kanila?
May mga panahon na lalaki ang hanap ng mga mata
Pilit na pinipikit paa makaiwas at di makita
Pero ang mukha at ang mukha nila
Mga nagbubulag-bulagang mata, pandikit na yata.
Minsan, tumawag ang makatubig na kalikasan
Dali-daling inilabas ang pahabang kayamanan
Sa isang tabi, ako’y di na lubusang mapakali
Sinisipat ko na pala ang kanilang pagkalalaki
Sa bus, hanap-hanap ay siksikan
Ang mga lalaki, dikit-dikit ang mga katawan
Tumatalikod ako, walang harang sa aking likuran
Para maramdaman ko ang maigas nilang yaman
Kapag nakaupo naman, sinisiksik ang sarili
Sa maskulado nilang katawan, ako’y nawiwiwli
Unti-unting nilalagay ang siko sa kanilang tiyan
Para aking maramdaman ang natutulog nilang Juan
Kapag ako’y naglalakad sa daan
Mga lalaking nakakasalubong, aking tinitignan
Hinahanap ko agad ang natatagong umbok
Kapag nakita na, ako’y bulkang sumasabog.
Randall at Apr 26, 09 at 10:34 pm
randall, thanks for the poem…ladino ka rin pala!
jimg29 at Apr 27, 09 at 4:21 am
grabe, based on most responses here, I can safely say sobrang middle class ang bloggers dito hahaha pinagpiyestahan ang English ni John Paulo S. Trinidad!!!
JP, u r d best!!!
George at Apr 27, 09 at 9:37 am
palma tayoma to me has the BEST answer…
George at Apr 27, 09 at 9:41 am
harrasment my ass. dun sa unang attempt pa lang nung larz, kung d mo typ ginawa nya, e di nilayasan mo sana. nahipuan ka, inimbita mo pa sa kuarto, nagpakita pa ng porn collection. lahat ng actions nya, ginagawan mo ng rason: showing his pubes-because lar’s is his idol kaya ok lang. Mga porn sa cellphone,- ok lang str8 porn naman e. Inimbita mo sa room – typical filipino trait. Whatdapak! sarap mo murahin. pero ok lang, i understand you. It’s actually part of the metamorphosis. Ayan o, look at you now.
Siguro if larz had been more discreet and subtle, malamang first boyfriend mo sya. lol
r. baruto at Apr 27, 09 at 1:49 pm
i am “john”.
a lot of MGG readers are fucking idiots.
whoever said i wasn’t resisting when he was reaching for my crotch? he didn’t even touch my bulge coz i was folding my left leg inwards for him to not be able to reach it, while holding the phone he is showing me
you think i’m drooling over this gay TV personality now? come on. i’ll bring him down.
fuck all these famous people who take advantage of fans.
a lot of MGG readers here tend to judge like smart-asses, forcing others to “get real” when there’s nothing to get real about.
i didn’t want what happened, and i wouldn’t want it to happen again, and certainly i wouldnt want to do it to other people.
and maybe you guys are too low-minded to understand my psychological situation at that time. being invited by a seemingly straight tv personality, being a fan, confused between idolatry and suspicions of sexual harrassment (which i have never experienced before), etc. a lot here are too simplistic in their judgments.
not all people are as sex-addicted as you guys. i’m not a desperate, yagit, kanto, low-profile guy who would make up stories.
thanks migs for sharing my story. i think we both have foreseen that my story indeed is hard to understand if they have not spoken to me face to face. apologies though, i’m just sick of smart-asses, of whatever kind, gay or not.
and thanks Bong for your comment.
john at Apr 27, 09 at 1:50 pm
I love the poem randall…”parang bading atah yung speaker?”…wahahaha..i-klaru bah?..pakopyah ha?…
mellicious at Apr 27, 09 at 9:06 pm
seventeen – what u experienced was ’sexual abuse” from ur uncle…
anyway, same thing happened to me..i met a guy thru friendster (he was a singer in Pinas). He invited me to see a movie with his friend. Pag upo pa lng sa cne, binuksan na zipper ko and he started jerking me off with his friend watching. I was caught unaware, part of me wants to stop him kc nagulat ako aggressive pla sya, and the other part of me says, ang sarap nman, besides celebrity e2ng jumajakol sa aken, so cge lang. He didnt stop til i came…he invited me to spend the nyt sa haus nila and to meet again the next week. I did not get in touch with him after that incident. Altho i admit nasarapan ako, di namn ako ipokrito,I felt i was also violated that night.
demonyito at Apr 28, 09 at 3:59 am
Ako. naharass. Way way back
I was still a student , and no sexual experiences and ’str8′. This happened at Carlo Reyes Salon, corner Morayta Espanya, sa may overpass. Yung baklang mangugupit dun. At the end of the hair cut, he started combing my hair, then alternately used his hands, then comb, then hands. He slowly started caressing. Di na siguro makapagpigil ang bakla, niromansa na talaga ang ulo ko gamit ang kamay nya (head po, hindi ulo sa baba), at dinidikit ang likod ng ulo ko sa crotch nya. Mahirap i describe pano. Pero i was not dumb, He was molesting my head. His hands were even on my face. Konti lang tao that time, i looked around for help, and for him to stop. I was so terrified, i hurriedly stood up. Isipin nyo na lang as i stood up from the chair and tried to get away, he was still holding my head and wont let go. and (ito pinakamatindi) i handed that bakla a tip (normally i dont, estudyante lang ako) sa takot ko. Stupid right? Panic mode ako nun, never had i experienced such. I abhor Carlo Reyes Salon from then on. Ang logo pa lang. PUTAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!
Fast forward, many years later, I went back to that salon again. I was there for vengeance, and remission and whathaveyou, gusto ko talaga gumanti! Kahit wala na ang baklang yun, subukan lang ng iba pang mga bakla dun na mangharass, magbabasag talaga ako ng mukha. Buti naman at special case lang ung may fetish sa ulo..
for sometime i was homophobic, dahil sa incident na ito, at kahit papano pag napapadaan ako ng morayta, nababawasan na rin galit ko, di na ko nagmumura.
bisayang tisoy at Apr 28, 09 at 4:10 am
? respect lang ang opinion ng iba. iba man ang interpretasyon ng mga readers ng MGG sa nangyare sa interpretasyon mo, respect lang. they are entitled to have their own opinion. and tinanong ni Migs kung ano pa ang ibang interpretasyon nila sa kwento mo.
peace po. relax lang. wag masyadong hot.
laddie at Apr 28, 09 at 10:39 am
Dear John,
I could emphatize with you because I have several similar (actually worse) experiences when I was in my growing up years. The worst happened when I stayed in the province away from my parents when I was probably 6 years old. Sorry but I don’t feel like “publicly” discussing the details here. It means that the theater incident I mentioned earlier in my post was not the first harassment experience I had. One experience included a verbal sexual harassment from a female church worker in a province in northern Luzon. I was probably an easy prey because I am a fair-skinned Chinese mentizo, was shy, and commuted in tricycles, jeepneys and buses.
Anyhow, I tried sharing the incident when I was a small boy to some people so I could just ventilate my pent up emotions and get their thoughts about it. To my surprise, I got almost the same reaction similar to what were posted here. Some were judgmental. Others were apathetic. I don’t think people really understand what happens to a minor at the point of harassment unless they were victims themselves. And even in my succeding experiences, I never learned how to deal with harassment. When it happened to me in the theater, I just literally froze and didn’t know what to do! DAMN THAT EXPERIENCE!
When I was in second year in college and became more matured, I somehow learned how to discern possible harassment. A gay talent agent “courted” me for weeks to become a model. Hahaha! I found this funny because I do not find myself goodlooking or a model type– I was just a Chinese mestizo– that’s all. He wanted me to report in their office in Makati during night time because the day time was reserved for the girls. I found this fishy. I have to say NO to the agent.
Although damage has been done, there can still be healing although it may take some time.
I wish you the best in your journey.
Best regards,
Bong
Bong at Apr 28, 09 at 12:36 pm
hey john, there’s no need for hostility, we gave our views based on how your story was presented, and if that’s really how it happened, then I’d say it was kinda loopy.
You said you resisted when he tried to reach for your crotch, maybe you did, but why the hell didn’t you excuse yourself and just leave? and if you were that uncomfortable with his gestures while you were still in public, why would you invite him in the privacy of your room? because he’s your idol? man, you were 16 or 17, not stupid… are you?
someone also mentioned that you being a minor means you don’t have the same capacity to ward off offenders as that of an adult, yeah, maybe, but he failed to see that in that age, you already have a “porn” collection, and not just that, you have the “kadiri” kind of porn that even me, at thirty has never seen anything like that. Its easy to play the “you’re young and confused” part because of your age, but I’m not buying it, for you to have that amount of porn, means you’re not as naive as you were trying to make yourself look. you may not be an adult, but you’re not a child either, besides, a minor can also be guilty of a crime…
You said we may be low minded to understand your psychological state at that time, I disagree, cause you’re the one making it difficult as there were lots of contradictions in your story, even now you’re contradicting yourself, you said you’re not someone desparate, a yagit, kanto, low-profile guy, so clearly, you’re saying that you have the capacity to say no, even to a celebrity, but you didn’t. why? and you may not be a sex addict but man, owning pornography show’s that you are quite sexual. my point is, if you really have it in you, then you could have put a stop to it right there in the beginning.
you may be the victim here, but you should learn to accept that in what happened to you, there were instances where you seem responsible as to why it did. people have boundaries, even a child knows when he/she is being violated. My advice, stop whining and move-on, your story is making you look the more stupid, if its meant to educate, well you’re doing a poor job, if you want sympathy, sorry, I don’t feel any for you. and if some of the comments here are affecting you so negatively already, wait till you get cross-examined in court if you decide to make this a criminal case.
sorry for being blunt but you’re giving way too much sh*t over this, its not like you were raped or was robbed of your innocence or something, you were harassed, yes, it was aggravating, yes, but this sh*t happened to me, and to most of us, its not something that would require you to get therapy just to get over it! or is it? haha!
anyway, you had your chance to show your disgust and stand up against his’ advances but you didn’t, now its too late man, no matter how many times you tell your story, it won’t change the fact that you allowed it to happen! so for now, pray that he finds someone who’ll have the b*lls to retaliate and put him in his God darn place. oki? peace out.
carl at Apr 28, 09 at 5:33 pm
carl, carl, carl hmmmm…u r not making sense my man..John was only 16 or 17 that time…however you may call it, he was still a MINOR at that age…do u know the meaning of MINOR???
U even said, i quote , ” even a child knows when he/she is violated” … damn dude..where do u get all these stuff?? u said it there..a child, for heaven’s sake…
U r a 30 year old man, carl..you shd know better, u shd know the differences of the mental capacities of a CHILD, a MINOR ( that is somebody below 18 ) and A GROWN ASS MAN OF 30 YEARS like you!!
drake at Apr 29, 09 at 12:37 am
absolutely pure unadulterated ENTERTAINMENT!!!!!
paging Mr. JOHN PAULO S. TRINIDAD, please post a retort!!! we’re all waiting here
Ivan Abarrasturi at Apr 29, 09 at 8:15 am
OMG!!! I was also harassed several times! And I totally LOVED IT… because it was with consent, anyway! Hahaha! XD
Loved It! at Apr 29, 09 at 9:06 am
not yet! enjoy ba?
rodier at Apr 29, 09 at 10:17 am
Has anybody seen or does anybody remember the movie of Demi Moore and Michael Douglas entitled, DISCLOSURE? Sexual harassment is when one party has the POWER over the other … ie, in the case of the movie, Demi Moore was the superior of M Douglas. I think this is just a case of being to overly friendly, pa buddy buddy. Of course, di rin natin alam kung baka naman ang John ay medyo nahalatang bading nung isa at yung isa naman may gusto din.
Mggf at Apr 29, 09 at 11:11 am
carl, you are a simplistic faggot.
do you know the difference between having a “porn” collection of naked aging women being fed feces, or ladies being pissed at in the mouth while blowjobbing men with diarrhea-spawned goo on the dicks? do those stimulate you sexually? huh?
you’re just an idiot trying to make sense.
i don’t buy it.
you’re probaby a sexual “harasser” ergo your point of view. how can i have clues about being sexually harassed if it’s the fucking first time it happened?
THINK man, think.
idiots.
john at Apr 29, 09 at 12:39 pm
OT:
guys! i think John Paulo S. Trinidad is deaf kaya medyo ASL ang pagkaka construct ng comment niya…lolz xenxa na sumakit ulo ko dun sa comment nya e na disturb tuloy ako. waheeheheh
peace!
bryan at Apr 29, 09 at 8:01 pm
To John
Fucking Idiots to those who don’t buy your story? Your story is full of shit.
I agree with Carl. Harassment my arse.
Pinaalis mo after too much touching and teasing. And now you’re gay. Ok happy ending. Next story please.
taekopink at Apr 30, 09 at 12:28 am
So here I am again still enjoying reading your contributions people.
well john, I know how difficult it is to be in that situation. I was once in a somewhat similar case. A time I felt violated sexually by someone where I felt over-powered somehow.
I am in my early twenty now and I had the incident when I was naive and young. Before I felt like I was tainted by that experience. Like I can never get over it. But somehow I did when I finally realized all my hypocrisy. It is something that is difficult to figure-out. You’re probably harbouring with the feeling of being abused yet you can’t accept the fact that at one point you are somehow willing. It took me 5 years to openly accept and say that. Wondering about my sexually maybe, well i dont swing to that and still prefer intimacy with my girl. She help me figure things out… one bright understanding light.
I still remember I was in my Second year in college then. The sem was done and I’m heading home in the province. I was still on budget trips then and it happened there on that day in broad daylight in the bus. I still recall that man, likes his on his thirty in a casual corporate look. I was watching the movie on the bus’ monitor when he commented how good looking a male star shown on TV. I said may be half true. and then he said I was good looking as well. I said Thanks but I said it was a lie. Frankly am not that good looking, just normal, and I was a bit skinny then. He tried to befriend me and I just felt that time that he looks trustworthy so I entertained some questions. He even ask my school then and commented that people from my school are very deviant and open-minded which I agreed. As time passes, i just realiazed that he is starting to be physical and already placed his hand on my thighs and somehow caressing it. I stopped him and try move away from him. I counldn’t change seat since its summer and the bus is full.Got tired of his suggestive touching and trying to evade them I fell asleep only. I was awaken by a sudden warm sensation later on like I’m being heated. I open my eyes only to find-out that he got my thinggy already in his hand straking it well. I was shocked and couldn’t move. A lot of things rushed through me including a senario that I can punch his air out of his body or yell-out for help, but I realized it would be something scandalous and I didn’t know what should I do. I just couldn’t move and I felt helpless… to cut it short, he made me cum right there. I can’t understand why I still cummed even though I know I was harrassed.
One thing I realized after a couple of years from now is that that moment was scary and tragic yet ecstatic for me as well. simply I also enjoyed it.
It is always difficult to accept things that we are guilty of. I was depressed for months since that happened and I couldn’t tell anyone cause I’m afraid for others to know. For them to know that I cummed even amidst the abuse done.
When I finnaly accepted the guilt I felt the same thing…ecstatic, and it didn’t took any part of my masculinity.
I believe that you were somehow abused by Larz but somehow you maybe, even unconciously, is willing to do it or at least experience it. we all pass that stage in life and you’ll get over it.
For the other comments, just respect them… everyones entitled to their own opinion anyway…
note: maybe you’ll find some errors here, sorry in advance, didn’t checked anymore…too lazy…just don’t want to be in JP’s shoe…
Jay at Apr 30, 09 at 1:17 am
Ayan na…dami nga mali…pasensya n po to all the grammar critics here… wrong punctuations, spelling and scattered ideas…
peace…
Jay at Apr 30, 09 at 1:27 am
yeah john, I know the diffrence, it means you’re a lot sicker than I thought. at 16 or 17, you find amusement over sick shit like that and you’re telling me you don’t know you’re being violated? beacuse it was the first time? huwaaat?!!! CRAZY!!! in how your story was told, “that incident” in the cr, made you feel very uncomfortable, if you don’t know you’re being harassed, why make a big deal out of it? I assume, as a guy, that’s not probably the first time you’ve seen some other guy’s dick, so what made the difference? because it is different! and you know you felt that there is malice in what he is doing to you, otherwise you wouldn’t feel uncomfortable moron!!! now, even for a 16 or 17 year old, isn’t that enough to make you stop and think for a second that maybe, hanging out with this celebrity isn’t a good idea after all? but in your case, NOOO! cause you stayed right there, sitting, waiting for yet another weird turn of event, this one though, ivolves touching inappropriately, which again, made you feel very uncomfortable, and yet again, made you do nothing, and instead, hitched a ride home and invited the fellah over the privacy of your bedroom to show how twisted you are by showing the dirtiest porn collection any person could have! now, are you telling me that its what a 16 or 17 year old will do in that given situation? a stupid 16 or 17 yr old perhaps!!! you make me puke john! and yet you’re calling me a sexual harasser when you dont even know shit about me? it’s way too easy for you to jump into conclusions and make stupid accusations, no wonder you’re making such a big fuzz over this! seems like you have this need to tell this story to just about anyone, why? to boost your ego? to make you feel more attractive because a “celebrity” made a pass on you? but nonetheless, Im not denying the fact that you were a victim(if this story ever happened!), Im just saying that you were a stupid one!
and drake, you probably went to the same school as john, as you two are quite similar in the way you express yourselves in writting. thats all.
carl at Apr 30, 09 at 2:02 am
hey jay, you made all the sense man, despite of all the “grammatical errors”(its not that important though), your comment showed sincerity and honesty. kudos to you for coming to terms with it, it was BRAVE of you to accept some responsibility over what happened, though I believe, in that circumstance, you are a real victim, its not your fault you reached orgasm, its something physiological, and Im sure at that age, being on a bus, you would never expect something like that could ever happen to you…
carl at Apr 30, 09 at 2:32 am
carl..u must have majored in astronomy as you have not a slightest knowledge of psychology..
i believe..as in ur stance..u r a predator urself..u must have molested or harassed a few and blamed it on them..lols!!
drake at Apr 30, 09 at 3:39 am
oh stop this already, in this new age of technology, we know how it is to be harrassed and how to avoid being a victim unless u live in the province but even there tv and all available stuffs for knowledge and power is already provided and easily accessible…kids and young adults are wiser now…everything in life is a lesson learned….lets all move to the next post…
butterflyrhai at Apr 30, 09 at 3:53 am
mawalang galang na po…
iba po ang kapasidad ng pag iisip ng mga bata sa mga matatanda,kaya wagpo ninyo iparehas ang dalawa sa pag cope sa sexual harassments or molestations.
Kaya nga mayrong mga BATAS na nangangalaga sa mga MENOR DE EDAD tungkol po sa mga bagay na yan.
Baket po naten pinipilit na kahit kids or minors e alam na ang ginagawa tungkol jan..Ang pinag uusapan dito ay ang maturity level po.
Ano ba yan, nakakahiya kayo…
NAG ARAL PO BA KAYO??
alfred at Apr 30, 09 at 6:34 am
john’s still gonna come out of his cage…he has lot of things to uncover and discover…
reader’s perception may vary due to different factors…
jed at Apr 30, 09 at 11:33 am
my elementary response–a thinking outside the box–to those who are trying to be legalese, although i am not a lawyer:
the country’s juvenile justice and welfare increased the age of criminal liability from nine to 15 years old.
the determination of the criminal liability, to quote the commission on human rights, is “hinged on the concept of discernment whereby the child can only be held accountable and responsible for his or her action if he or she knows the difference between right and wrong and understands the consequence of said action.”
certainly the law was not only for juvenile offenders but also for their welfare and protection. in john’s case, the supposed harassment happened when he was 16 or 17.
to follow the concept of discernment, he was a year over–at least–the age of discernment set by law, where he’s supposed to sift through things and old enough.
bananachoked at Apr 30, 09 at 12:23 pm
banana choked…
nag english ka pa..
criminal liability ang inupakan mo..that mostly pertains to “juvenile offenders” or minors committing criminal acts..
ang pinag uusapan dito ay about sexual harassment..
alfred at Apr 30, 09 at 12:34 pm
oh alfred, yes. sabi ko nga i was thinking outside the box and i think i made that statement clear. well, the title of the law says juvenile justice and welfare act. justice and welfare. they have pretty simple meanings.
the law can be used by a john the victim, john the offender or the john who needs protection.
and i was talking about discernment. the very concept that can be used for suspects and victims.
what i am saying is if one can discern bad from good, one can surely discern whether he is being abused or not. and john was how old that time? 16?
now alfred if u can discern that, not my problem.
bananachoked at Apr 30, 09 at 12:48 pm
D2 sa america, bananachoked, kahit ang 17 yr old na guy or girl na willing sumama or makipagsex or what have u sa mas nakakatanda sa knya,say 21 yrs old or older..i repeat kahit 21 yrs old lng…considered as FELONY na yan!!
ALFRED at Apr 30, 09 at 1:13 pm
and do u know what offense??
RAPE po ang ikakaso…
ALFRED at Apr 30, 09 at 1:17 pm
Statutory rape laws are based on the concept that a young person may desire sex but may lack the experience possessed by legal adults to make a mature decision as to whether or not to have sexual contact with a particular person. Thus, the law assumes, even if he or she willingly engages in sexual intercourse with a legal adult, his or her sex partner may well have used tactics of manipulation or deceit against which the younger person has not yet developed sufficient discernment or defense.[12]
Critics argue that a young teenager might possess enough social sense to make informed and mature decisions about sex, while some adults might never develop the ability to make mature choices about sex, as even many mentally healthy individuals remain naive and easily manipulated throughout their lives.[13]
Another rationale comes from the fact that minors are generally economically, socially, and legally unequal to adults. By making it illegal for an adult to have sex with a minor, statutory rape laws aim to give the minor some protection against adults in a position of power over the youth.[2]
demonyito at Apr 30, 09 at 1:20 pm
drake, i’d rather shop for shoes than engage in your bullshit…
carl at Apr 30, 09 at 1:33 pm
ay obviously, di mo nakuha ang point ko alfred. did i absolve larz of any criminal liability, if indeed the sexual harassment ever happened? i did not.
actually ang simple ng point ko after i sensed someone was playing innocent–that a 16-year old boy knows. and because he knows, putting a stop into it was not as difficult as he wants us to imagine it to be.
he could have easily put a stop into it and left us all not with a nagging thought that a clueless 16-year old was taken advantaged by sex-starved tv personality.
on the other hand, alfred, dito sa Pilipinas, kung saan may penchant ang gobyernong manggaya ng batas ang America–kung nasaan ka ngayon–maraming mga prostituted women and children–lalaki man o babae. At marami ring abused na women and children–lalaki man o babae.
At alam ko ring dyan sa America, kahit pa man may mga batas, ay marami ring prostituted women and children–lalaki man o babae. At marami ring abused na women and children–lalaki man o babae.
–now, takot na akong lumayo (sa topic man o kung ano man).
bananachoked at Apr 30, 09 at 1:55 pm
*taken advantage of by…
bananachoked at Apr 30, 09 at 2:03 pm
whether john’s a victim or not, at that age, he’s not too young to know what’s happening, and he proved it when he asked ‘larz’ to go and hit it. but in all the circumstances, I can think of a lot of ways where in he could’ve stopped it right there in the beginning. its not like he got trapped or put in a situation where he can’t say no, besides, there was no mention that ‘larz’ used force or intimidation, but rather just way too much flirting which crossed john’s boundaries, and the thing is, he’s also in an environment where he could’ve just walked away, but he didn’t. now tell me, for a 16 or 17 year old, is that situation really that tough? i’ve read a lot of stories wherein a child, has made heroic decisions or acted in a way that saved not only his own life but the life of other people, so please, don’t under estimate a child… those of you who say that they don’t have the capacity to help themselves in these situations, are only making them easy targets of these crimes…
carl at Apr 30, 09 at 2:15 pm
but carl, walking out of an awkward situation where your tv idol is trying to grab your crotch or bulge (btw, john’s term, which made me squirm) is an act that is perfectly an anti-thesis to heroism.
lols
bananachoked at Apr 30, 09 at 2:23 pm
haha, bananachoked, I know, which is why i find this very absurd, if a child can act on life or death situations, why can’t a 16 or 17 year old vehemently make a stance, on what is an apparent violation on his personal boundaries… whyyy?!!!
carl at Apr 30, 09 at 2:44 pm
Tipikal na mga pananaw ng molesters or child abusers ang sagot ng mga iba jan. Na minolestya nila ang mas nakakabata kasi pinayagan sila.
alfred at Apr 30, 09 at 9:51 pm
Tipikal na mga pananaw ng molesters or child abusers ang sagot ng mga iba jan. Na minolestya nila ang mas nakakabata kasi pinayagan sila.
alfred at Apr 30, 09 at 9:51 pm
Just reading the comments here alone, not considering the grammar, malalaman mo kung sinong mga bobo at hindi. haaayz
I agree with you Carl, maayos naman pagka explain mo. Bakit di naiintindihan ng iba? LOLL
taekopink at May 1, 09 at 2:59 am
the letter sender already has a conclusion on what really happened to him, he wont accept opinions and what he perceived happened to him and his opinions about it is the only thing that matters to him based on how he responds on some of the comments and posts here…the purpose for giving comments or suggestions is to educate, help cope up, and maybe learn to accept things easily, on a different perspective and point of view but thats not the case here so moving on, if he feels his just a victim period, then so be it….
butterflyrhai at May 1, 09 at 9:46 am
siguro abnormal lang ako pero i don’t find it harassing… i mean my guy friends tease each other by grabbing each other’s manhood…. and we too show our manhood to each other…. and we watch porn together… we even masturbate while watching… (good for me. lol). or maybe dahil friends kami kaya ayos lang. PERO KUNG AKO ANG NASA POSISYON NI JOHN NGA BA? HAHA. PAGBIBIGYAN KO NA SI LARZ!!!!! TAPOS AFTER NAMING MAG “DO” BIBITAWAN KO ANG MGA KATAGANG “I NEVER KNEW YOU WERE THAT CHEAP!” SABAY ESKAPO! WAHAHAHAHA!!! OHA OHA OHA!!!!
bloodberry at May 1, 09 at 10:29 am
he should have just said no. it’ll all be over.
john at May 1, 09 at 12:16 pm
John will definitely have a difficult time getting over the supposedly tragic experience he had. He could not even respect and keep an open mind to the different opinions here.
He only wants to hear what he likes.This is a forum for crying out loud.You have to be objective.
Now, am I a fucking idiot too?
rue at May 1, 09 at 6:31 pm
gusto ni john na paniwalaan siya at makisimpatya tayo sa knya dhil sya ang biktima, pero kahit biktima ginigisa muna sa korte bago paniwalaan, dapat niyang tanggapin na kahit anong salaysay ay dadaan pa rin sa masusing pag iimbiestiga at maraming tanong pa rin ang kailangan niyang sagutin. At sa istoryang ito, iisang tinig pa lang ang ating narinig, at ito ay ang kay john lamang. Maaaring iba ang kwento ni lars sa totoong nangyari sa pagitan nila ni john, at may karapatan din siyang isiwalat ang kanyang panig. Ang suspek ay dapat manatiling inosente sa paningin nino man hanggang sa mapatunayan na siya ay guilty, kaya john, payo lamang, kung may marinig kang kumento na hindi kaaya-aya sa iyong pandinig matuto kang rumespeto, kung ganyan ka sa asta at pananalita, nawawala ang pagiging biktima mo, sa halip mas nagmumukha ka pang masama. kung di ka marunong rumespeto, pano ka irerespeto ng iba?
crisostamod ibarra at May 1, 09 at 11:31 pm
Basta!
gumamit si john ng term na BULGE!
lols
bananachoked at May 2, 09 at 12:08 pm
yes, idiots.
so plenty of them here.
and im sure they have seduced younger people to their claws kaya ganyan sila makapagsalita.
im not against homosexuality, but a lot of faggots are irritating
may nagmamagaling pa diyan na nagsabing “those who don’t buy your story.”
bakit, nagkuwento ba ako? have you spoken to me? or are you just basing it on second hand info AKA migs’ post?
i am not against migs’ posting of my story, pero malalaman mo ang ka-nagmamagaling-an ng iba dito, akala mo kung sinong makapagsalita. Ni hindi nga style letter-sender ang post dito for you to conclude things na ganun ganun na lang basta. mga nyeta niyo.
may nagsabi pang tungkol sa “bulge.” I know what bulge is. What kindergarten-minded person in his 20s wouldnt know what a bulge is? UMBOK sa Tagalog. I have a conservative female friend who knows what a bulge is, too. My Mom would know what a bulge is. And when I was harrassed, I knew what a bulge is. I have a bulge. Or are you stupid?
Idiots, yun lang ang masasabi ko.
john at May 2, 09 at 11:31 pm
may nagsabi pa na “unless galing siyang probinsiya.”
e bakit ba? promdi naman talaga ako. and that was my first year to live alone in Quezon City dahil kakatransfer ko lang mula sa isang college sa probinsiya sa isang university sa Quezon City.
I didn’t know that faggotry was that severe in Quezon City, pardon my ignorance at that time.
Shet. Kakainit ng dugo.
john at May 2, 09 at 11:35 pm
ANG UMBOK.. -BOW!
IN ENGLISH, THE BULGE.. -BOW!
LOL
HAAY, BUHAY.. PARANG UMBOK (BULGE).. HAHAHA
matt at May 3, 09 at 1:19 am
no one can offend you, you choose to be offended. yun lang yun. if he was feeling uncomfortable, then he might have as well told larz (santiago???) that he felt that way. Good thing he did; he made him leave. Pero kung masarap naman yang larz na yan, virgingity out of the window.. hahaha!
magman at May 3, 09 at 11:06 am
bka nman he is trying jhon kung kakagat ba sa kanya…
hmmmpf?
bka nagustuhan din ni jhon..
hehehe.,.
=)
greenfeather at May 3, 09 at 4:48 pm
Sorry I read the blog and migs.
Sorry I m not perfect english
Hindi alam ako aral tagalog. but Ako use sign language.
I understand story of two men.
I help them because the purpose is important the gender safety personal.
What is Harassment? Its meaning of Touching and part of Body.
John Paulo S. Trinidad at May 3, 09 at 6:07 pm
@John Paulo S. Trinidad: I understand. I apologize for the comments of my readers. I hope you forgive them, they do not know your situation.
Guys, please be kind. World Peace!
migs at May 3, 09 at 6:24 pm
I m biggest understand and peace mind. I don’t be angry. FORGIVE THEM…
BIG SMILE…
FInish i read the article. I help them. But not wrong to doing.
BE PEACE WORLD…
John Paulo S. Trinidad at May 3, 09 at 8:34 pm
buti pa si John Paolo S. Trinidad kahit nilait na ang grammar, cool pa rin, yung isang “john” dito, akala mo kung sino kung makaasta, masyadong feeling, at kulang sa pansin(KSP), we couldn’t care less kung sino ka, if you think your story is not well presented, bakit ka sa mga nagkocomments nagagalit? sa yo na rin nanggaling na 2nd hand info lang ang basis ng comments namin, di ba mas dapat kang maging understanding? pero since di ka marunong umintindi, sino ngayun ang IDIOT? di ikaw!!! at sa kontrabida attitude mong yan, mas lalong mahirap paniwalaan na biktima ang isang tulad mo… alam mo, ang pikon ay laging TALO!!! kaya ka di maka-get-over kasi you’re harboring a lot of hatred, and di ka lang ke larz galit, galit ka rin sa sarili mo at lalo sa mga taong ayaw ka paniwalaan, thats why you need to hear the affirmation na biktima ka nga, coz maybe in your mind, you’re not even sure of whether you and you’re story make sense or not!!!
carl at May 4, 09 at 1:17 am
I again 100% agree with Carl !!!!
and
I ask apologies to John Paulo S. Trinidad. Even i didn’t make okray, I smirked upon reading his first comment. He was trying to help by posting his view, laughed at in return, and yet he retaliates with a big smile. Tunay na world peace in action. Waw.
Para kong binuhusan ng tubig na malameg.
taekopink at May 5, 09 at 1:17 am
agree din ako sa yo taekopink(interesting name… hehe) regarding JP, I was among those who laughed at and made fun of his comment, and for that I’m sorry too JP… sorry din Migs for using you blog to make fun of somebody like JP.
carl at May 5, 09 at 11:04 pm
A sign of a true gay: ang bilis manglait ng kapwa bading.
The movie “Disclosure” is a correct use of the term “sexual harassment.” It was set in the workplace. One was the superior of the other and used her position in a sexual manner to get something or force something out of a subordinate to her ends. Worse, the case of Anita Hill makes it even more complicated, but it still involved the workplace.
If it’s a case of an adult and the other is under 18 years old, then it SEXUAL MOLESTATION, like the case of those priests in Boston, or the head of the boy scouts, etc. If sex actually occurred between the two, then it’s STATUTORY RAPE. May lawyers ba dito who can shed light on this?
ethan at May 5, 09 at 11:20 pm
NAKU ETHAN…kahit i clarify mo pa yan sa mga “knowitalls” d2..nde nila iga grasp yang info na yan..ilang beses na ipinaliwanag sa knila yan.
nakatatak na sa isip nila na khit menor de edad ka (or if u r a subordinate), u r responsible for ur own actions, and there’s no one else to be blamed but urself if u do get into those situations.
kaya ung mga PREDATORS dyan..cge dali…mang harass kau ng mga menor de edad, tutal pag bumigay sa inyo, nde kayo responsible kahit mas mature and mas me isip kayo..kasi kasalanan un ng bata dahil pumayag sa mga advances nyo!!
DRAKE at May 6, 09 at 4:26 am
mali isipin na ang sexual harrassment ay tulad lang ng sa pelikulang disclosure. isa lang sa klase ng sexual harrassment ang kaso ng boss-employee, or someone superior over a subordinate, ang sexual harrassment ay pwede gawin ng sino man kanino man. as per definition, sexual harrassment is continued, unwanted sexual advances, i.e. for you to claim you were sexually harrassed, you have to prove first clearly na it was unwanted. I think yun lang ang naging basis ng comments ng karamihan dito, di naman kasi naestablish masyado ni john na unwanted nga yung sexual advances ni larz, kasi naman nakuha pa niyang imbitahin ang tao sa kwarto niya e.
di rin niya sinabi na underage siya nung time na nagyari yun, kung babasahin nyo ang huling comment niya, sinabi niya na nagtransfer lang siya from a college sa probinsya, therefore, hindi siya talaga freshman, and that would make him at least 18 yrs old, an adult.
sobra namang manghusga ang iba dito, porket di nag-agree sa istorya e, idiot ka na or sexual predator ka na agad, haays, at least yung iba dito feeling lawyer lang, e yung iba dyan e feeling judge.
crisostamod ibarra at May 6, 09 at 1:30 pm
grabe, mashadong involved ang mga readers ni migs. ang tataray!
hehehe.
World Peace mga ateh!
jedong at May 6, 09 at 1:56 pm
Signs of being a true gay:
Fan ni Asia’s Songbird (Regine Velasquez). At kapag medyo may edad na, Fan ni original Songbird, Barbra Streisand.
At kapag bata pa, Fan ni Asia’s Sisiw, Charice.
Ahihi. Kung mayroong True Gay, meron din bang False Gay? Confused na str8 siguro..
World peace
taekopink at May 7, 09 at 3:05 am
i think that john was not harrassed.. my college paper was all about harrassment and i had dicovered that sexual harrassment was only committed when the victim doesn’t want or is hessistant on the act done to him…i think (secretely) john also wanted what larz is doing… as he had said that he doesn’t still know his true feelings towards a man…
voltz at May 7, 09 at 6:12 pm
Obviously, John was not harassed as Larz do not possess any power over John. This is simply a case of an act of lasciviousness. Refer to statutory law and jurisprudence.
ron at May 8, 09 at 9:53 am
there are some instances na kahit menor de edad na lalaki (straight pero with identity crisis) na kapag hinawakan ng isang lalaki matanda sa kanya ang kanyang sariwang katawan, pag hindi nag react ang bata to the max, ibig sabihin lang nun, gusto nia ang ginagawa ng matanda at bakla siya. ganun lang un! tsaka kayong mga laitira sa grammar, pwede ba maging malawak nmn ang pang unawa nio…kasi khit kayo me pagkakamali rin…
amino_uae at Jun 17, 09 at 4:09 pm