Manila Gay Guy

I join you all in a silent prayer for those who were affected by Typhoon Ondoy.

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Pagkatapos ng isang napakahabang araw at gabi ng walang-tigil na pagbuhos ng ulan, nagising tayo ngayon na sumisikat ang araw. Parang walang nangyari.

Naisip ko lang, sana, ang buhay parang ganun din lang. Sana sa bawat unos, isang tulog lang ang katapat. Sana sa bawat sakuna, ipikit mo lang ang mga mata mo’t kusa itong mawawala. Sana sa bawat pagkabasag ng puso, ay sadyang magsasama-sama muli ang bawat nitong butil at bubog. Sana sa bawat gabi ng kadiliman at kasawian, pagkagising ay sumisikat na araw na ang haharap sa iyo. Parang walang nangyari.

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This is one of those few Fabcasts that got so many responses, and seems people have been waiting for this second part. So here it is!

Dear friend CC (CorpCloset) owns the opening lines to this second part, he says, “Focus na tayo kay McVie!” And indeed we did!

Dahil nga naman pagjo-jowa ang usapan, at dahil sa aming grupo, si Joel McVie na lamang ang hindi nakakaranas magkaroon ng jowa ever in his life, napagkaisahan na gawin siyang focus ng discussion. In the first part, we dished out generic recommendations on how to get hitched, in this episode, we went another level closer to reality by discussing McVie’s case. You will hear brutally honest suggestions peppered with okrays and laughters, the signature fabcast in its high energy, high volume form, for you to enjoy and really just laugh with.

LISTEN: (28 mins 48 sec)

Download this episode (right click and save – 27.65 MB)

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You likey? I likey!

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More of his pics here.

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1. Belated happy birthday to my dear, dear friend Gibbs Cadiz! Instead of expecting gifts, he is the one raffling off a brand-new Sony Ericsson cellphone! Check out his blog post here.

2. Last Monday, we recorded a new and exciting fabcast episode on gay men who have girlfriends. Nakapanggigigil na diskusyon (pero tawanan pa rin as usual)! Watch out for it! And for the part 2 of the “Paano Ba Magka-Jowa?” fabcast, I will be posting it this weekend. Abangan!

3. I’m leaving the country again for an extended business trip next week, and will be back in December pa. I will miss my friends here. Awwwww. Sabi nga ni McVie, “friends are the family of your choice.”

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Ipa-blood test mo kaya ako… (more…)

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hi migs,

just one of your silent reader, who’s now asking for another perspective.

call me mark, turned 33 years old this year, pretty much succesful and self-made. been in a relationship for 10 years with a guy who is 10 years my senior. we met when i was 23, got together and have made a life for ourselves. it wasn’t a perfect life, we’ve had our ups and downs and our share of heartaches and joys. ive always felt that my life with him was ok, God-sent and God-willing; I know I wouldnt be where i am right now without his support and his love.

In the course of the relationship, I had unconciously/subconciously gave up my friends; especially my single friends and the late-night lifestyle. instead, i embraced my partner’s preferred life and friends. At the time it seemed perfect.

Lately however, i saw some friends on facebook, browsed their pages and somehow i felt that these friends had the life, which to my mind, I would have had (or even I should have had) had I not embraced his life and lifestyle. dreaded what-ifs are starting to show in my head.

It’s not that I resent the choice I made to be with him and embrace the life we have. NOT AT ALL.
Resent is such a strong word for something that I know I had a hand in as well. Its just my mind wandering and wondering–what ifs? and what should i do now? do i insist on re-treading a different lifestyle? or do i stick with what i have and what has worked? mind you, i dont intend on giving the relationship up, only that I take on new friends of my own and breaking away from our couple-dom. and so where do i begin?

honestly, i dont even know if i have a question, but i guess i just need an outsider’s point of view, and another perspective.

thanks
mark

Hello Mark,

You are very blessed. I say that not only because you have a wonderful relationship with your partner of 10 years, but also because you are going through one of the most exciting times of your life. Your age, and the questions that are now floating in your mind strongly suggest that you are in a life transition. Some people call it midlife, as you yourself suggested, but I prefer to call it a life transition.

Mark, keep in mind that life transitions like yours are normal. This means that there is no need to panic, and I assure you, there is nothing wrong with you or with the questions you have been thinking about. This is precisely the time when, because of your years, you have already lived quite a full life, and have achieved certain things, that other parts of your life previously on the sidelines start to make themselves felt, front and center. While this is understandably quite unnerving at first, I assure you, it is very natural.

Your what ifs, what should i do now, and other similar inquiries are part of life’s natural course; you may think of them as invitations to live a fuller life, one that is lived with more self-awareness, and if you so choose, a journey to self-actualization. What I’m saying is, huwag kang mabahala.

You are blessed, and I say this again because it seems to me that you have been given a chance to be more conscious about your life transition. Some people, for whatever reason, go through transitions without them knowing it. They think that asking questions like yours is inappropriate, or even insane, and because of that, they fail to honor the natural course of things, leading to perhaps, not being able to reap the benefits of the phase. But you are blessed because you are going through your transition with a lot of self-awareness. You know that while you are asking these questions, there are certain things you value that will not change — your love for your partner, and your loyalty to the relationship you have nurtured these past 10 years.

Having said all of that — and because you asked “where do I begin?” — I would add that this is a time for a lot of internal work. By this term “internal work” I mean those things you imagine when I say the following words: reflection, prayer, retreat, pondering, silence, rethinking, reinvention, metamorphosis. Do it in whatever way you want to do it. Let the questions you ask help you dive deep into yourself in a more powerful way, to reevaluate your values, then figure out what you want to hold on to and let go of, what you then want to take on, and then move on. All these need a lot of internal work, and yes, a lot of energy. Think of it like the caterpillar’s cocooning phase. It’s that “dark period” when the caterpillar spins a pupa around itself, immobilizes itself, so that it can transform and metamorphose into something so different, yet ironically essentially the same organism.

During this cocooning phase, I suggest for you to be very open to your partner. Intensify your communication with him, in quantity and quality. He is your partner in whatever phase in your life. Tell him about what is happening to you. He can be a very big help.

Your question about taking on new friends is quite simple. Go, have fun and mingle, and take on new friends. But I suggest before venturing out, be clear on your intentions, and be clear on what you want to achieve. Is it to escape? (And, if so, escape what?) Or is it to experience things you miss given your current set of friends? Whatever your intentions are, that’s fine, as long as you have given enough thought to it and are clear.

Lastly, let me address one emotion that may be lurking in you now, or just around the corner, just because transitions naturally evoke this particular emotion: FEAR. I’ll address it with the following words, written by a good friend, as I think it captures the essence of what I want to convey to you:

… Fear is a cycle, a natural human instinct that prepares us and propels us into greatness. When we overcome our fears (and) arrive on the other side – only greatness can happen – really. Only greatness, because we have taken them on, dealt with them as best we could and regardless of how it turned out, we arrived on the other side much more knowledgeable than we ever were when we started.

What a wonderful gift from God – this FEAR.

It compels us to be present; to be our best; to show up; and to pay attention.

It has so much in common with LOVE – 4 letters, two vowels/two consonants, intermingled with emotion, the basic drivers of everything we do, and both are just so amazingly rewarding when we allow ourselves to experience them and live our lives through them.

Really.

You are blessed, Mark. I wish you all the best!

With love,

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Before getting serious about his workout, this is what Piolo’s personal trainer said about him: “He couldn’t do a single pull-up on the chin bar. I thought he was joking. He was soft. He had a flat chest and straight body, and a tricep injury from a stunt. His body was not V-shaped…” [Source]

Today, he’s got a physique that rivals the best among his straight counterparts Inspiring, right? Tara na sa gym!

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Mike Acuna is one of my favorite models featured in the soon-to-be-released video, “Summer Boys.” I saw a video clip where Mike is showing off his Muay Thai skills. I also had an opportunity to meet Mike in person. He seems to be a nice guy, and most notably, he’s really hot in person. Wishing you all the best, Mike!

More of Mike’s smoldering photos here.

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