Manila Gay Guy
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May isang reader tayo na gustong humingi ng tulong sa mga mambabasa ng MGG. Heto ang liham niya. Kayo na muna ang magbigay ng inyong kuru-kuro, habang si MGG ay naglalakbay pabalik ng Pilipinas (flight in a few hours).

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May problem po ako. Di ako lumalapit sa bading. Kasi baka matuluyan akong maging bading. Kaya sa mga straight guys ako sumasama.Kapag straight guys kasama ko Nakakalimutan ko na yung mga bagay na kabadingan. Kasi naimpluwensyahan na nila ako. Nanliligaw, nagkaka-gf, nagdo-dota, nagba-basketball at nagkukwentohan about sa mga guy things. Sanay na akong nahihipuan, tinitigan at ino-offeran pa ng pera ng mga bading. Pero parati akong umiiwas para maayos ko yung sarili ko .Kahit guapo pa. Ang problema ko ngayon pati mga straight na kabarkada ko nagpaparamdam sa akin. Yung isa dinidikit yung t*t* nya sa likod ko. Sabi ko baka wala lang yun. Yung isa naman kapag kaming dalawa lang kinikindatan ako. Yung isa naman nung nalasing kami, sinama ako sa place nya tapos natulog ng nakahubad! Sa isang kama lang kami.. Sa isip ko normal lang yan. Pero nung marami kaming natulog sa bahay nya, nakadamit naman sya. Bakit ganun. Yung isa naman kapag nagbibiruan kami parati nyang sinasabi “reypin kita dyan eh!” Tapos pinaka masakit pa! eh ang gugwapo pa nila. Anu bang dapat kong gawin! Minsan di ko na ma-control yung feelings ko. Pero pinipilit kong magpakatatag.

– Juan

Comments (121)

  1. dunrey mark said on 28-11-2015

    para sa akin pare tama ang ginawa mo umiwas ka sa tukso..
    ang pagiging bading ay isang psychological disorder ito at nakukuha o naiimplowensyahan through sa type of nature ng pamumuhay meron ka. tayo ang pumipili ng landas na gusto mating tahakin.
    ang maipapayo ko lang ay wag kang maglaladlad masakit ang katutuhanan pero Kay langan mong mamuhay kung among kasarian meron.. pare sabi ko kasarian Hindi ung nararamdaman. 😉
    be happy and enjoy life ;)t

  2. Eriq said on 03-10-2012

    Kaya lang naman takot magpakaBeki ang mga beki dito sa Pinas dahil we only see bekis in one dimension, na dapat pag beki ka, naglilipstick ka, dapat pagirl ka. Pero di ganun yun.

    Mag-out ka na teh. Go lang tayo. haha

  3. rheymer said on 10-08-2012

    😀 problema ba yan?

  4. piola said on 31-03-2012

    Dyos ko dhay..magladlad kna kx…bka naman kx feminine ka gumalaw o mgsalita d mo naman namamalayan e na bumubigay ka ng mga ilang segundo xempre lalake tunay mga un matinik ang pandama at pang amoy kng katabi nila amoy malansa tyak maaamoy un….ay naku bading ka nga kung ako yan sau isaisahin ko na cla chiuchupain khit pa sabay sabay cla iinumin ko mga tamodz nila tsarap naman hmmmm….

  5. - hunter said on 02-02-2012

    huhmm.. im started din somehow sa mga ganyan.. pero since then yung straight na tropa ko nag aya.. just to jerk off with me once…twice.. until one of us goes down only to find out na were both bisexual.. its hard to admitt that you are belong to them but still when it comes…. malalaman mo rin

  6. pikk009 said on 21-11-2010

    @juan
    cguro parehas tau ng pinagdadaanan ngaun ang payo ko lng wag ka lumantad kc aq nsa role confusion pdin eh kya d ko p alam tamang payo.basta halos same tau ng problem 19y/o gwapo din sabi nila.. haha
    pro prang sa sitwasyon mo parang alam na nila n may pag ka gay ka kasi aq ginagawa ko din yan dun sa kakilala ko n prang gay din hinaharot ko pro d sex ah ung tipong hawak n my lambing, hawak n mahigpit mga ganung tipo b. pro wala lng trip ko lng..
    or siguro pra skin gay din ung friend mo kasi prang d namn gagawin ng str8 yan maliban nlng kung super dikit talaga kaung mg friend or ikaw lng tlga ngbibigay ng malisya..
    un lng..

  7. drifter said on 17-11-2010

    @carl, bongga talaga mga comments mo, idol kita

    Juan, panoorin mo na lang Brokeback Mountain para matauhan ka

  8. ngengotaq@yahoo.com said on 10-10-2010

    i2 lng masa2bi q sumakit mata ko s ka2basa s mga commentz nyo,lol

  9. ian said on 21-09-2010

    Hi juan, Alam mo hindi mo kailangan magtanong kung bakit ganon trato nila sa iyo, ang dapat mo lang gawin ay kilalanin mo ang sarili mo, timbangin mo ang mga bagay bagay na nagpapaligaya sa iyo at dun mo makikilala ang sarili mo, hindi mo pwede itago ang pagkatao at katauhan mo sa ibang tao, magiging masaya ka lang kung ganap mo ng tanggap at kilala ang sarili mo, just be yourself at yung trato nila sa iyo ipakita mo na dapat ka pa ring igalang at ang importante eh wala kang nasasaktang tao.

  10. keneth said on 11-08-2010

    D naman ksE kau nagdaan sa sitwasyon lalake ka pero inlove ka sa lalake.. nkakaramdam k din sa babae.. pero d mo msyadong makuha antensyon mo sa kanila,, alam mo juan nangyayari saken yan ngaun.. oo gwapo ako sabi nya saken cute daw ako tapos ganyan ganyan,, i love you daw kahit may kaharap na iba,, pag talagang hndi mo ayang sakyan ang mga biro ng iba mahuhulog ka agad sa kanyan lam mo bang 17 yrs old lan ako mahirap talaga pero ang sarap pakinggan un mga biro na un.. minsan iniicp mo “SYA NLANG KAYA” puro nlang ba tayo imagine sana maging matatag tayo lahat na nangyayari tong sitwasyon.. nilikha tayong lalake kaya panindigan natin…. aixt ? so sad talaga ang buhay ng ganito..

  11. geek-o said on 08-07-2010

    achecheng, ansaya ng predicament na to, panalo ahahaha

    anyway, kung saan ka tlaga kuya, umayos ka… hehe
    if you feel like you really wanted to become straight, go live a straight life… it is a matter of choice at kung ganu natin mapaninindigan ung choice na yun, ayt?
    so, kung ayaw mo sa mga kabarkda mo, ipasa mo lang sakin ha, more than willing to make salo for you, lol…

  12. brent said on 20-05-2010

    juan..ako c C___, yung isang friend mo..
    k lang bro, type din kita..

  13. OLFU NURCING :) said on 01-04-2010

    NDE NILA GAGAWEN UNG MGA BAGAY NA GANUN KUNG ALAM NILANG STRAIGHT KA. MAYBE ALAM NLANG MY TNATAGO KA SKANILA KYA IKAW ANG PINAG IINTERESAN NILA 🙂 FOR ME KAUSAPEN MO CLA FACE TO FACE.

  14. Jazzper said on 12-03-2010

    alam mo dude, nakakarelate ako sa experience mo sa totoo lang.. email me up dude..

    hatememore123@gmail.com

  15. ken said on 13-02-2010

    Hello Juan.. My name is ken Working as one of the Medical Team in hosital.. hehe Juan diko alam kung bakit ako nag comment sa Blog mo or what!.. natutuwa lang siguro ako sa mga nag bibigay ng kanilang mga payo sayo.. well wala ngang masama kung Gay or Bi or lesbian ang Isang tao as well wala kang ginagawang masama at walang sinasagasaang tao, just be your self and happy even me nagkaganyan din ako naging maligaya din ako sa mga Straight friends ko nasasayo kasi siguro kung papaano mo sila ititreat.. aswel na wala namang masama sa ginagawa mo gawin mo mo ung gusto mong gawin na naayon sa sarili mo wag kang gumagawa ng mga bagay na puro ka PLASTIKAN lang act what do you feel matatangap kadin nila ako nahirapan nga ako sa kanila pero ng nag pahiwatig ako sa kanila tinawanan lang nila ako and take note mga kaybigan ko padin sila.. minsan sila a ang mag lalambing sayo kahit ako naiilang sa ginagawa nila sakin pero enienjoy ko lang at wag mong bibigyan ng kahulugan ung ginagawa nila.. sa mga Guys talaga eh wala lang un.. kahit ako eh niyayaos ng mga un at umaakbay pa wala lang un basta malins ang kunsensya mo.. hehe…

    n_n

  16. ewan said on 04-02-2010

    i have a feeling na gay din ang mga kabarkada mo… pare-parehas lng kayo ng ugali.. mga pretender…
    sorry for the harsh words but that’s how i see it…

    baka mas magaling pa silang maghada kesa sayo e! kaya kung ako sayo, sabi nga nila, spread your wings and fly butterfly… anover??? napagiiwanan ka na ng panahon!

    ^_^

  17. sweet_mirmo@yahoo.com said on 04-01-2010

    siguro medyo mag laylo ka muna!!!
    pag isipan mo muna ang mga bagay bagay!!
    di mo kailangang gawin ang isang bagay na alam mong mali o di ka sigurado kung dapat mo bang gawin!!! pag bulaybulayin mo ang mga pang yayari!!! para mas lalong makatulong sayo!!! mag basa ka ng scriptures, mag pray ka, at ituon sa mahahalagang bagay ang oras!!!!
    alam ko JUAN na mahal ka ng ama natin sa langit at alam ko na ang mga nangyayari ngayon sayo ay mga pagsubok lang ni satan, kaya wag kang bibigay, if you have faith in your god, our god!! alam ko malalagpasanmo yan!!! being gay is not in our heart, nasa isip lang natin yan! pero if we put god in our mind, heart, and soul. magiging strong tayo at malalabanan natin ang mga temptation ni satan sa atin!!! goodluck JUAN!!! if you need a friend just mail me!! OK!!
    goodluck and GOD bless!!

  18. helios said on 27-12-2009

    I’m not sure if I am echoing a previous comment here (as I, unfortunately, haven’t got the time to read all 101 of them. But being in the company of “straight” people as a means of hampering who you are could only do so much. Sooner or later you would have to deal with the realities, the discoveries and the experiences and your straight friends would not be able to do anything about it. Baka nga naman walang ibang ibig sabihin yung mga bagay na ginagawa ng mga kaibigan mo pero nabibigyan mo lang ng ibang kahulugan kasi yun ang totoo mong nararamdaman. You don’t really have to detach yourself from your straight friends. If they are indeed real friends, tatanggapin ka nila kahit anong mangyari. More importantly, do not detach yourself from who you truly are. All the best!

  19. zergyzerg said on 26-12-2009

    unang una.. hindi lang pang -straight ang DOTA..

    ikalawa.. eh baka naman yang “Straight” na friends mo mga closeted din.. kaya nag hihintayan lang kayo.. unang bumigay talo (or panalo. depends on how you look at it.)

    ikatlo.. baka naman alam na nila at ikaw na lang ang ayaw umamin na bading ka kaya hinuhuli ka nila.

    in the end nasa iyo yan.. kung ayaw mo eh di huwag.

  20. Rickz said on 23-12-2009

    take ur time juan.. Lalabas din yan himut0k na meron ka.. In fact nakakainggit ang sitwasyon m0..

  21. Winterking said on 22-12-2009

    Wag kasing magbigay ng malisya. the more you interpret it the more you will be confuse

  22. officemate said on 20-12-2009

    Guys like to fool around with others in their circle(of friends) or close barkadas. One of their favourite pranks is acting like they’re gay or closeted gay. The others would then play along and treat this guy as such. But this is just fooling around. It makes their existence and bond much more thrilling and fun to a certain point. But one ever really knows, huh? There would be times when deep in the mind of a guy there lurks thoughts of longing and craving for true physical connection with another guy. Then they would start seeking it out because it gives them this feelings of arousal. No one else has to know it of course. To divulge it would be a betrayal of the brotherhood and shooting down the manflirting game. For guys the real fun lies mostly in the chase. So, Juan, go ahead and flirt with them. That’s the nature of guys, or didn’t you know?

  23. Slutguy said on 19-12-2009

    May bahid ka din ng kabadingan,Juan..alam mo yan. Amp! Ka!

  24. Juan said on 17-12-2009

    Kahapon nagkasabay kami nung isa sa c.r. Tapos nagkwentuhan habang nagsasalamin. Tapos sinabi nya nami-miss na nya magpa-bj sabay kindat! Sabi ko “di ba yung syota mo wild” . Tapos di sya sumagot at nagpapungay pa ng mata. Sabi ko Hoy! bingi! Narinig mo ba yung sinabi ko? Di sya sumagot. Wala akong naisip o naramdaman na kakaiba. bigla ulit syang kumindat .Tapos nakaisip ako ng kalokohan. Sabi tara! dito na tayo . hinawakan ko yung butones ng pantalon nya. Aba! Di pumapalag. Sabi ko willing ka naman! Tapos tinawan ko sya ng matagal hanggang sa di ako makahinga. Tapos tumawa na rin sya. Ngayon sila ang napaisip. Ngayon wala na sa akin yung mga ganung bagay ,ngayon kapag kinindatan nila ako kikindat ko din sila.Wala na rin akong ibang naiisip o malisya sa kanila. Salamat dun sa mga advice nyo.

    Thank you!
    Juan

  25. Get It From Boy! said on 16-12-2009

    MGG bonggang bongga ang blog mo! a must read for all gay guys!

    @juan
    be true to yourself. don’t live your life on how you perceive, others will want you to lead your own life. we only pass once in this world, so make the most out of it. don’t be too consumed with being confused too, mag aral ka na lang. but remember, we make our own lives. you are the master of your faith and the captain of your soul.There’s NOTHING WRONG with being gay. INVICTUS.

  26. Candy said on 15-12-2009

    nakakapanilim ka ng paningin… layas…

  27. Jasper Cortez said on 15-12-2009

    Manalamin ka muna Juan! Baka nakabalandra na sa buong katawan mo ang kabadingan mo pero in denial ka pa rin.

  28. andrei said on 15-12-2009

    te’ d kaya bading din ang mga kabarkada mo?
    hehehe

  29. mistah said on 15-12-2009

    guys, tanggap naman niya na may posibilidad na bading siya o na bading siya talaga.. confused lang siya kung ang pagpapakalalaki niya in front of straight friends is ok para ma-maintain yung closeness or not ok..

  30. reyn said on 14-12-2009

    for sure na sense na ng mga friends mo na medyo malamya ka at para mapatunayan yun sila sila na mismo ang nag initiate ng mga situation kung bibigay ka…….parang nagpupustahan sila kung sino sa kanila ang makakapagpaladlad sa kapa mo kasi base sa story mo almost lahat ng friends mo nagbibigay ng motibo…….di mo man lang na sense yun na somethings goin’ on with your friends

  31. carmen ghuia said on 14-12-2009

    but, i also admire your self-control. in the end, it’s really up to you. come out to friends, or hide what you are feeling. i like ace leon’s advice. think it through, think it through…

  32. carmen ghuia said on 14-12-2009

    you’re even lucky that men want to “rape” you. you had the chance when your friend slept with you naked! pag bigyan mo na sila! go! they want you to come out, obviously.

  33. Juan said on 14-12-2009

    Jax I-type mo sa google yung word na “confused” makikita mo yung recent post nya agad sa list. Ngayon ko nga lang nalaman na ang daming readers nito. Pero ok lang yun.

  34. jAx said on 14-12-2009

    sa tingin ko bading ka na talaga kasi dito ka napadpad sa site na to’ kaya go go go!!!

  35. Ace Leon said on 14-12-2009

    Alam mo, swerte mo nga e, kung sakaling sa mga ganung pangyayari e hindi ka bumigay at biglang ma tempt na hawakan ang nakahubad na friend mo.. Meaning isa kang bi-curious person or isa kang gay in denial. And the good side is, kaya mong mag control unlike some…

    Advise… wag ka makipagsex sa mga guys na kakilala mo, baka ipagkalat nila. Error ko yun at ayoko maulit sa ibang gustong magtago for all eternity sa closet nila. Mas safe kung nakita mo lang siya somewhere and nagkataon na you like to fuck him immediately.

    Hindi kita pipiliting uminom ng sprite, or magpalock sa loob ng closet mo, kasi choice mo nga na wag na e… ayaw mo. Try to be a normal guy then. Pero don’t tell me that no person in this blog warned you sa mga side effect niyan pag tumanda ka then dun ka lang nag-out (low ang sales value mo…etc…etc..)

  36. papakarl said on 14-12-2009

    juan, juan, juan…. the mere fact na ganyan ang paghingi mo ng advise is proof that you’re like us. i admire your control, bihira yan, unless you’re super in the closet and conversing with some paranormal eklat over there hahaha. one piece of advice: observe how they treat gay men. if you think you can handle what they’re doing to them, then it’s time to open the closet and reveal to them what you truly are. thank you, bow.

  37. Narda said on 14-12-2009

    Hayop Ka! Ganda mo! Nangiingit ka lang… Kung totoo lahat ng sinabi mo, aba swerte ang tawag dun at di problema noh! P.I. ka!!. Bahagian mo naman ako ng swerte mo.

  38. Pipo said on 14-12-2009

    san banda dun yung problema?

    ay yun na ba yun? akala ko nangiingit ka lang. lol

  39. didi said on 13-12-2009

    ..ang tawag dyan PANTASYA!!! isang malaking PANTASYA!!!!

  40. ding said on 13-12-2009

    baka napansin na nila yung tinatago mong lihim… baka pinapakagat ka lang nila para mapatunayan nila na totoo hinala nila..

    mas ok pag nagpakatotoo ka sa sarili mo pero pag isipan mo nalang muna kung anu ang gusto mo talaga kc depende din yun sa sitwasyon and be ready to take on the challenge..

  41. supergay said on 13-12-2009

    habang kaya mo, hold on to it. alam ko na its really difficult lalo na pag yummy kasama mo, pero you have no choice. They’re your friends. Just dont bite their advances.
    Kasi may mga boys naman na feminine kumilos pero they are real boys.

  42. din said on 13-12-2009

    pag ako ikaw…

    ILALANDI KO SILANG LAHAT NG BONGGANG BONGGA! 😀

  43. Lloyd said on 13-12-2009

    Katulad mo, confused pa din ako. And katulad mo, i have a lot of straight friends, and i enjoy their company. Ang mahirap intindihin sa mga comment nila sa taas, karamihan grab-the-opportunity-to-have-sex-with-them ang patutunguhan.

    kaya siguro hindi ka nila maintindihan.

    i understand u. Confused ka lang.
    and i guess wala ka naman talagang “sexual” motive sa kanila dibah?

    Like u, meron akong isang straight friend, my gf siya, and close kaming tatlo. the problem is, suggestive din ang mga kilos nya. Hindi ko na lang pinapatulan kc hindi naman ako “sexually-attracted ” sa knya. mahal ko siya, OO, pero walang lust na kasama. i treat him special, and he treats me the same way.

    ang problema lang siguro sau, baka umaasa kang may something sa mga actions nila. mejo nag-fee-feeling kang gusto ka nila. but i tell u this, — WALA LANG YUN SA KANILA.

    wag mong isiping gusto nilang ipunta to the next level ang friendship nyu. kaw na rin nagsabi, baka ma-develop ang “pther” side mo.

    kung gusto mo talagang malaman ang totoo, why dont you ask them? tanungin mo lang sila. wag kang manghula ng mga sagot kasi lalo lang bibigat yang loob mo..

  44. carl said on 13-12-2009

    hi, may problem din po ako, di ako lumalapit sa mga straight kasi kung sasama ako sa kanila baka maging straight po ako ulit, e since naka-churva ako ng kapwa ko menthol e sobrang naging divah na ako, kaya po sa mga bading lang ako sumasama… kasi mas masaya po sila kasama, lalo na yung mga paminta at gwapong bading, masarap poh sila sa kama, I mean kasama… at ayaw ko na bumalik sa pagiging boring na straight, ang problema ko po ay masyado ako maganda at nagiinarte, saka naiimber poh ako sa mga klosetang bading na nagjujumilit na magpakalalaki dahil feeling po nila ay kabawasan ang pagiging bading!!! tulungan nyo po ako dahil kung di ako makapagpigil baka masamapal ko ng nota ang mga feeling straight na bading na yan. pinipilit ko lang po magpakatatag at magpakatotoo,

    -Nuaj…

  45. ton said on 13-12-2009

    iam like that before… lagi ako nag t-take advantage sa isip ko! dahil ang laging na sa issip ko noon katulad ko din sila kaya parang maxado ako nagiging affected sa mga actions nila! ok lang yan pero mahirap talaga mag tago sa sariling anino pare!

  46. mancrush said on 13-12-2009

    Hi again, Juan. Hey, how old are you? I’m guessing, since you’re still in school, maybe you’re in your late teens or early twenties. Anyway, we guys mature really late, haha, emotionally that is, and yeah, even socially. And this is precisely the age where you get bombarded by all these confused states, blah blah blah. Blame it on raging hormones. I’m suspecting you haven’t been with your current group of guy friends for long, huh? And, most certainly, you haven’t been with this kind of group before. Am I right? Different dynamics are involved there as compared to one-on-one friendships, especially among males. Because I noticed, with the girls, how they behave to one of their girlfriends is almost indistinguishable when they’re in company. They’re like a bunch of kittens. We guys, we’re like a pack of wolves. More rough, much more raw. The jokes we like to throw around could make anyone blush and turn heads in public places. Girls are much more refined and hushed. Having cited that difference, boy groups are generally deemed lagging behind when it comes to carrying on with finesse bonding together with their buddies. It takes some time they say, that is if they don’t part ways before long. But after school, that’s when you all go your separate ways and form other friendships. For the time being, though, it’s business as usual. You just have to face up to it -that your friends'(well, some of them as you said) behaviours are how it’s supposed to be. You are one of the guys, so just suck up to it. You’re never too sure, maybe they treat the others like they treat you as well. Don’t you think so? Just enjoy it while it lasts. OK. You know what(?), you’re just maybe experiencing a mancrush. That’s okay. It happens all the time. It’s when you take your imagination further and actually fantasise about what’s behind their jockstraps -then that definitely takes it to another ballgame. So, do you? Well, you could answers that to yourself. But as I mentioned in my previous post, if you’re so curious about this whole gay thing, try and find out in the bluntest of ways which is to simply have sex with another guy, although with someone you like, of course. That’s so easy now -these days. No hassles. Provided you’re willing to go through that sort of thing -if not,. then forget about it and just be happy with the way things are. Be more accepting. Being gay is not really that big a deal anymore. Believe me, when you finish school and start looking for a job, all your confusion regarding this matter will pale in comparison with what you’ll have to face up to. Sexuality between men will always remain a touchy yet highy intoxicating thing. It’s fun! Until, if ever, you’ll fall in love(or lust) with a girl. Take care, man.

  47. RandallPhilippe said on 13-12-2009

    Para sa akin, ang mga straight guys ay hindi talaga ganun ka-sensitive. How will i qualify the word sensitive? Hindi sila sensitive in a sense na they dont mind their penis being felt by their frieds kapag naghaharutan. Yung unintentional ba. Yung akbay akbay, talaga naman mahigpit ang akbay ng mga lalaki especially kapag close ka nila. Sa kanila, wala lang yun. Alam mo, feeling ko, gay ka nga Juan, kasi ako, may mga pinsan ako na na straight tapos kung magharutan sila ng mga straight din na pinsan ko as in may involvment ng touching of genitals pero for fun lang yun. One time nga inakbayan ako ng pinsan ko. Tapos kung ano na tumakbo sa utak ko na baka bading nga siya or not. Feeling ko, ganun lang talaga ang mga closeted or not yet discovered gaiety in us. We tend to give meaning sa actions ng guys when in fact their action is just PLAIN actions. Yung pagtulog ng nakahubad na kayong dalawa lang tapos nang marami na kayo hindi na siya nakahubad. Para sa akin, wala lang iyon. Close kasi kayo kaya ganun. Kung baga, hindi siya nagbibigay ng malisya kung makita mo naman ang penis niya kasi ang alam niya meron ka rin nun at higit sa lahat alam niyang “straight ” ka rin. Siguro sasabihin mo rin na ka-close niya rin yun iba, hello, hindi rin naman pare-pareho ang closeness natin sa friends natin kahit na close tayo sa kanila, do you get my point? Saka kung mapapansin mo, kunwari may nakakita sa genitals ng isang guy, parang sa kanila, hindi sila magdedwell dun over and over na parang nawala na ang puri nila. Sa girls ang gays lang yun.

    Sa tingin ko, you gave too much meaning sa mga action nila. In my case, kapag nasa labas ako, naguguluhan din ako kasi marami talaga akong nahuhuli na guys (i dont know kung straight nga sila or magaling silang mag act straightly) na nakatingin sa akin while walking sa labas. And it boiled down to 2 things: ang guys kasi napaptingin sa ibang guys hindi dahil type nila kundi tinitignan nila kung mas maganda yung porma at yung isa naman ay kung pareho nga kayo ng dugo. Ganito lang yan e. Kapag may nakasalubong ka na “guy” tapos nagkalampasan na kayo then pag lumingon ka tapos lumingon din siya malaki ang chancena gay din siya pero kapag hindi, malamang hindi talaga. Parang napatingin lang talaga siya. Yun. Marami talagang ambiguous na actions sa gay world.

    Masasabi ko na maswerte ka kasi dahil you get the chance to interact with them. See their you know. Hehe. Their body. And all.

    Dont reveal yourself na you are in confusion. Just go on with the flow. Huwag na huwag kang mag-initiate ng something. Let them (kung ganun nga sila). Hayaan mo na sa kanila manggaling na gusto nila makipag-sex sa iyo. Kung hindi, hindi talaga. Meaning, yung sinasabi mong motivating action ay just plain actions lang pala for them. Ikaw pa ang nahulog sa saril mong patibong.

    Ingat ka. Just enjoy what you have. Saka, bibihira na lang yung gay tapos ang friends mo ay straight (kung straight nga talaga). Sana nakatulong yung comment ko sa situation mo.

    Ingat ka!

  48. Taekopenk said on 13-12-2009

    HI JUAN, at hi mga gurlz, ako uli, nagbabalik.. Tadaa

    Ganito na lang, while you’re still confused, at habang kaya mo pa.. Sino gusto mong maging pagtanda mo-
    1. Si Boy Abunda, Shalala, etc.. OUT and GAY, nakakachupa ng walang humpay.
    2. Si Ogie Diaz, Jun Encarnacion (SLN) mga Super bading na may Pamilya. Active sa kabaklaan. Active sa pamilya
    3. Si Eric Quizon, Rowell Santiago, Roderick Paulate. Piolo Pascual, Discreet, down low, nakakatikim, Mga forever singol.
    4. O mga kagaya nina Edu Manzano, Dave Celdran, Kiko Pangilinan, Mar Roxas, etc, may mga pamilya, pero nachichismis na bading., Bading man sila o hinde, chinuchupa man nila mga friends nila, nasasaktan man nila pamilya nila, malay ko at pakelam ko.

    Gusto mong uminom ng Sprite at magpakatotoo, maging OUT, then choose 1. Gusto mong maging closeted choose 3 and 4. Gusto mong maging OUT pero ayaw mong mapag-isa, choose 2 at gayahin si Ogie Diaz.

    Gusto mong maging 100% str8? Ayyy,, Punta ka sa Maguindanao, andun ang elixir, pagnahanap mo na, tirhan mo ko ng tatlong patak =p

    O ayan, Pili na.

  49. silent expectator said on 13-12-2009

    Ate,

    Maganda ka na…wag na mag-maganda pa

  50. hi juan said on 13-12-2009

    hi juan, email mo ko para matulungan ka, globesuckg@yahoo.com

  51. Juan said on 13-12-2009

    Di ako galit o nandidiri sa mga gay. Im just trying na umiwas sa kanila. But in a good way. Kapag lumapit sila Kinakausap ko rin sila gaya ng iba. Ako lang ang lumalayo. Kasi for me baka maging way yun para madevelop yung other side ko. Lalo na confused pa ako. I always use internet to my research and study, but lately naisip ko baka meron akong kaparerong situation.Nagsurf ako sa net about “confused guy” nabasa ko yung isang letter dito sa MMG. So sinubukan ko rin mag-send ng letter.

  52. Lester said on 13-12-2009

    that should not be a problem!!! Stop pretending sister, and just live comfortably with the fact of your gayness!! You don’t have to cross dress or wear make up in public if that is not your gig. But please learn to accept yourself as you are. There is nothing wrong with you. You are just a man who falls in love with another man. Period. Don’t strain yourself to be a man falling for a girl. That is simply not you. Right now your straight friends are suspecting, and they are right believing that you are gay. You cannot hide it. It is just in your skin. It will show no matter what you do. You can be honest with them about your sexual orientation and still be friends. Live the authentic life, and believe me the man for you will come soon. It happened to me, and it happened to all of us gays. We’ve all been there. Cheer up. Enjoy the advent.

  53. Jek Jek said on 13-12-2009

    of course… truth will set you free Mr. Juan… you don’t necessarily have to tell your friends if you found yourself gay… you have to be true to yourself first, kaya ka nagkakaroon ng identity crisis…

    you are living in fear of truth, kaya ini-iwasan mo ang mga bading… which I think will destroy you bit by bit…

    my only guess is some of your friends only testing you by means of sexual innuendos… but don’t over react on it… don’t go deeper…
    my advise to you… tell them the truth… it takes a lot of gulp of courage… but it’s the only way, dear… after all, your still man enough to do that… kung iwasan ka ng iba, then that’s your lost.. but if among them lead your footsteps… then show them the way…

    you’re just in a middle of nowhere… you have to find it.. don’t doubt your newfound sexuality but follow it wherever your heart is…

  54. carl said on 13-12-2009

    nakakapagtaka lang, for someone who wrote a letter to a gay blog site tulad nito, parang napaka-1980’s naman ng impression mo Juan on being gay, I mean, when you said na di ka lumalapit sa bading dahil baka maging bading ka rin, di ko alam kung saan mo nakuha yang idea na yon… kasi as far as I have read sa mga previous comments dito, parang ang daming makabago at intelligent views ang mga nabasa ko na dito about being gay, kaya nakakatawa lang and nakakainis at the same time, na nakarating ka sa blog site na to na ganyan kakitid ang pagiisip mo towards homosexuality… and hindi problema ang situation mo, ikaw lang ang gumagawa ng sarili mong problema dahil masama at madumi ang tingin mo sa pagiging bading, kaya gusto mo ISISI sa mga friends mo ang nararamdaman mong attraction sa kanila, kesyo sila ang nagbibigay ng motibo!!! di lahat ng bading e magulo ang buhay, at di lahat ng straight ay maayos ang situation, it all boils down to the individual!!! kung maayos na bading ka ba, o maayos na straight ka ba!!! besides, nasa 21st century na tayo iha, being gay is not bad, but being an irresponsible individual is, at sa ginagawa mo you’re being iresponsible with your words, in a way you’re discriminating against gays for the fear na baka mahawa ka sa kanila, di sakit ang pagiging bading no, ok?!!! alam mo, baguhin mo ang tingin mo sa mga bading kasi baka nakakalimutan mo, ANG MGA BADING NA INIIWASAN MO AY SIYA RING MGA BADING NA HINIHINGAN MO NG PAYO NGAYON!!!

  55. the_man said on 13-12-2009

    @imladris: i totally second your comment. kasi kung hindi, magpapakamatay na ako at hindi sa akin nangyayari ang mga ganito. hahahaha!

    but juan, if what you say is totally true – i apologize. tapos sampalin kita kasi, hello, magtu-2010 na. working towards our own happiness shouldn’t be too hard.

  56. matt said on 13-12-2009

    cguro … di ba nga sabi mo lahat cla guwapo? xempre khit paano my gusto ka sa kanila hndi b? ika nga “kpag gusto mo ang isang tao, lahat ng bagay na ginagawa niya ay binibigyan mo ng kahulugan”. update mo samin kung wat mgiging result ha =]

  57. kimjunhwa said on 12-12-2009

    Well, i think, gaya nga ng sabi ng iba, alam na rin ng mga kabarkada mo ang tunay mong anyo… na isa kang marinara. i think magpakatotoo ka na lang. kasi based on my personal experience, mas maganda yung habang maaga pa lang, nire-reveal mo na ang totoo mong pagkatao sa iba kesa yung pinaguusapan ka pa behind your back.

    I second the motion to others’ insights: with the way you think about the gestures and actions of your barkada, feeling ko may idea na rin sila about sa iyong true color.

    Personally, I have been close to my boy classmates recently lang. And okay naman silang kasama. Alam na alam nilang bading ako since first year pa lang kami and were now already graduating. Hindi naman nila ako tinataboy. Parang normal lang din. Nalalandi ko pa sila minsan. Tawag nila saken “Badeng”… since nag-iisa akong “prinsesa” sa classroom namin. Well, with these, I just wanna say na it’s better na maging totoo kesa pinag-uusapan ka ng iba. At to the fact na bulgar kang tao, wala na silang dahilan para pagchismisan ka.

  58. hebe said on 12-12-2009

    @mancrush:

    Well said…

  59. guyrony said on 12-12-2009

    Juan, I truly understand what you’re going through and that’s perfectly fine. Confusion is still going on especially if you are still worried about criticism that might come out of people’s mouth whether close to you or not. The important thing is that you respect yourself for your decisions. Don’t let anyone hinder you in your goals. Coming out is a tough job but a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do. In the meantime don’t ponder about it too much,it will give you tons of headache.

    P.S. Migs, Party time na!!! Woohoo!!! 🙂

  60. hebe said on 12-12-2009

    I think my situation is somewhat similar with yours. We were 5 best mates. where classmates in college. It’s during our junior years when they started showing extraspecial interest in me. They have their own way of seducing me (if i may say so). Now, the big difference between you and me is that; I know myself in heart that am GAY. So, to make the story short. I did have sexual relationship with 3 of them except for one, which is not my type not that his not good looking. Until now, where still best mates even they have their own family.
    CHEEROO!!!

  61. Joe said on 12-12-2009

    Dear Juan,

    Ang ganda ng KWENTO mo… pure imagination…

  62. mancrush said on 12-12-2009

    Hi Juan,
    The fact that you wouldn’t divulge your real name says a lot about your wanting to come out of this with your integrity intact . It’s good that you’re an observant person, a trait you could fully use to your own advantage. [from yourself: “Itutuloy ko na lang yung ginagawa ko. kasi mahirap talaga mabuhay bilang Gay dito sa bansa natin.”] The majority of the population is still self-avowed heterosexual, gay numbers are still marginal. The group representing the majority definitely would advocate their own kind, leaving the rest in the fringes of society. You’re right. If you ultimately choose to be openly gay, then you’re aware of the consequences. It’s easy for the other bloggers here to say otherwise -whatever they say is based largely on their own life situations, how they developed and eventually came to terms on who they think they really are. But the people around you(your family, your acquaintances, your friends) play a very big role in shaping who you’ll be in the long run. From what you’ve written here, it’s obvious that you haven’t associated with openly gay persons that much, hence the reluctance -and add to that the still-prevalent societal stigma on being gay(due more to what’s generally perceived they do behind the scenes w/c is wanton engagement in promiscuity). Let’s face it, openly gay people are stereotyped this way. And the heterosexual community’s reservations when it comes to recognised homosexual lifestyles are easily understandable from preservation-of-the species point of view. A person’s thoughts(that includes his feelings) are indicative of who he is. Although, that’s still a highly subjective matter -because, regardless, different people will still view you differently. [from iino: “it’s just a matter of choice. either you stick to forcing yourself to be straight, or give in to temptations.”] Perhaps what this advice is implying is: just be true to yourself, what you really feel. But always remember -you are responsible for your actions. Many a life had been ruined just for giving in to a momentary weakness. If you’re really curious about your full-on reaction to being gay, you could try it out -but discreetly. That’s the only sure way to find out. But don’t do this one with any of your friends. You might only end up regretting that, seeing as to how conflicted you are with the whole shebang. Try it elsewhere. It’s alright -you don’t have to like it. You said so yourself that you go out w/ girls, right? Yeah, they’re nice company, especially if they have a crush on you. It’s just natural. Whereas, the unwarranted intimations from some of your friends are probably nothing but innocuous incidents. They happen. To everyone. You can’t be giving meaning to every nuance a person makes. We’re all spontaneous by default when we’re around our closest buddies, I guess. Unless, of course, you feel otherwise. Anyway, you seem to enjoy being around your friends. That’s fine. Your doubts are probably just influenced by the things you see around you -and there’s a lot of that in the Philippines! -but may be entirely unfounded. But going back, by all means, try it with another man and see how it goes. Provided you’re not scared shitless of what might happen -of what it might entail. I read it somewhere: “If you’re straight, sleep with a man at least once and if you’re gay, don’t go through life without sleeping with a woman. Either way, you might be surprised at how natural it will feel -if you can get past the mind-fuck of stereotypes. In the end, it’s just another person that you are relating to in a physical way.” But have you tried it with a girl yet? Just asking. How did it feel? Even if you have, there’s really no way of comparing it to the other since you haven’t gone that other way yet. So, it all comes down to what you’d like yourself to do. But, please, don’t take some of the other blogger’s comments as gospel truth. If you want to live your life as a ‘straight’ guy -don’t you think this is hardly the place to be seeking advice? Most of what you’ll get here is plain “Go for it girl!”. I could just imagine you squirming at such quips. Haha. But seriously, looking at a thing from all angles would aid you in making the wisest decision. Life is not all about the unrelenting pursuit of anything remotely sexual anyway. It’s about a lot of other things as well. Things that doesn’t involve a person’s midsection. Life-affirming things, y’know. Respect your friends. They could be more helpful to you in ways other than whether you could actually get it on with them sexually or not. Focus on your studies instead. The camaraderie you have with your friends is a wonderful thing. Don’t jeopardise it just because you got curious. There’s more to life than a few drops of spilt cum. And if you truly enjoy it with the girls, what’s the problem then? And that part where you relate about ‘suggestive’ gestures from your friends. Simple: you’re not used to such things. I live in a country where hugging another man or even kissing him on the cheek upon greeting is commonplace. My male buddies, we’ve done the craziest of things like up to almost wrestling each other naked. But that’s just for the fun of it. Doing it for the laughs. Being close to another person, another man, in a platonic non-threatening way is something you shouldn’t shy away from. Don’t take it the wrong way -not because you accidentaly brushed against someone’s penis while showering together or someone else nonchalantly put his arms around your shoulder, that you’re already in a gay situation. It’s when someone would try to seriouly hump you from behind that you’d have to think twice. [grins] These gestures from your friends are most likely nothing more than buddying up -a testament to how close they regard you. Would you rather have it that they treat you like you have the swineflu and keep their distance from you even if you think you’re okay to them as a friend? Learn how to reciprocate them in their rapport with you. That, in itself, is enjoyable, too. Bond with them more. Closeness, trust, reciprocity -are foremost.

  63. Juan said on 12-12-2009

    Anim kami, Tatlo lang sa kabarkada ko ang gumagawa nun. sila yung mga chickboy sa grupo namen, yung easy go lucky. Parang lahat ng gusto nakukuha. Yung tatlo na yun di masyado close. Kaya malabo na “bitag” yun. At tsaka di sabay sabay yung time na nangyari yun.

  64. Rome said on 12-12-2009

    Nakakaloka ka! Hindi yan problema hijo. Ang tawag diyan ay BLESSINGS. Isa kang pinagpalang nilalang. Go! Go! Go!

  65. joey said on 12-12-2009

    tini TEST ka lang ng mga yun. Malaki na ang duda nila sa pagka-iba mo.

    its your decision my dear. ikaw ang mas nakaka alam sa plus factors and even sa consequences pag pumatol ka.

    or baka naman pare-pareho lang kayo lahat na nagko-kunwari!

  66. dl_emperor said on 12-12-2009

    seryoso ba yang letter sender na yan?

    hindi yan totoo… nag-trip lang yan.

    pwede ba…

  67. NickSam said on 12-12-2009

    Sounds like you are in a titillating and exciting situation. Palit na lang tayo ng scenario gusto mo? Ang tukso talaga, kung kelan ka nagpapakatatag eh saka ka naman nilalapitan. My suggestion to you is don’t fight the inevitable. What’s the inevitable? That your down the road to the gay-kingdom.

  68. yosef rasul said on 12-12-2009

    its good to be totoo, wag kang plastic

  69. Lasher said on 12-12-2009

    Hmmm…Too good to be true! Classic. Sana totoo ‘to and if it is…I’d feel for you, Juan. Malaking dilemma nga yan! Sobra. Wish u all the best of love and luck na lng cguro. May the best friend win, I guess. 😉

  70. zoo said on 12-12-2009

    SPRITE ang katapat mo! Magpakatotoo ka sister!

    actually … isa-isahin mo na sila! in the end ikaw ang wagi kasi nahada mo silang lahat! yay!

  71. roel said on 12-12-2009

    juan,

    its not about just being true to yourself but i think its your timing. maybe your friends are getting mix signals from you or vice versa. being OUT is the best feeling of being gay but it comes with a PRICe. i feel sorry for some people in here who donttake this seriously, if its that easy, who needs ones opinion? anyway, whatever you come up with, may it make you the happiest coz we all deserve to be worry free.
    GOD BLESS u.

  72. Dennis said on 12-12-2009

    edi lahat kayo paminta.

  73. Judas said on 12-12-2009

    wala lang yun. walang meaning lahat ng yun. ang kabaklaan mo lang ang nagbibigay ng meaning dun dahil wishing ka. umaasa. tsk.

  74. korbel said on 12-12-2009

    isa-isahin mo sila. pero pasecret pa rin. o diba kunyari kayo lng dalawa may alam pero kuha mo na sila lahat. go juan. huwag maging tamad.

  75. Lokaret said on 12-12-2009

    May choices pa. Si lola Swarding at lola Germs.

  76. jay said on 12-12-2009

    omg, i love carl’s comments (#5), haha 😀

  77. Nympho said on 12-12-2009

    Comment number 19…wala na bang pwedeng i compare na bading kundi si lolo alfie at tito boy…at excuse me hindi porke old na bading mahirap na…marami din naman ang happy…ang importante…juana…is to be free and of course to be happy…..lonely and gay……lets hope not.

  78. cholo said on 11-12-2009

    baka naman kasi sa tingin nila bading ka talaga. there is no point in hiding your identity sister kung naamoy nila ang lansa mo. go girl, magpakabongga ka!

  79. Edgar said on 11-12-2009

    ay naku gurl, ibig sabihin nyan nahahalata ka ng mga str8 friends mo na bading ka kaya ka nila pinatri-tripan okay? kasi never nilang gagawin iyan sa isang katropa na wala silang hint or clue na bading siya. it’s either naaamoy ka nila, or tini-tease ka lang nila para malaman kung bibigay ka ba o hindi okay? malay mo may agreement yang mga yan para subukin ka di ba. kasi nga nalalansahan na sila sayo he he he.
    ngayon nasasaiyo kung pagbibigyan mo ba sila o hindi. it’s your choice kung patuloy ka bang magpapakaipokrita o gi-give in ka na sa pleasure na naghihintay sa iyo.
    kung ako sa iyo, go na girl, at tigilan na ang pandaraya para masaya ha ha ha ha.

  80. bertbaltazar said on 11-12-2009

    Bumigay ka na ngayon. Bata ka, matatag … pero pag tumanda ka, ganon ka pa katatag? I am 43, I was a late bloomer, started out in my 30s – and I have no regrets. Its not easy being gay, in the Philippines or anywhere in the world.

    Kaso, dami kong nakikilala – papakasal, magkaka anak, may apo, at sa pag edad, BIBIGAY DIN! Aba, eh di mas maraming nadamay, nasaktan, kasi nagka pamilya ka na… kaya bumigay ka na, if you enjoy and like it, stay out.. if you dont, go straight.. but then you do know the answer…

  81. dave_davao said on 11-12-2009

    girl! haba nang hair mo…un lang…

  82. dom13 said on 11-12-2009

    LET IT OUT GIRL! ano ba, girl? nanjan na sila sa harap mo pipili ka na lang… sige ka pag kaw na ang may gusto ayaw na nila.. naku.. baka kumulot ang bangs mo, girl! yun na!

  83. neon said on 11-12-2009

    pare, subukan mo kaya mag jakol kasama nila? para malaman mo naman ang katatagan mo. ‘pag wala kang naramdaman, straight ka pre, pag meron tuloy mo lang. normal lang yan !

  84. bluelightninglad said on 11-12-2009

    Juan, ganyan talaga ang guy friends.

  85. ming said on 11-12-2009

    sumisikip na ang kloseta!

  86. Juan said on 11-12-2009

    Sa comment nila. Siguro ide-deny ko na lang, tapos i-ignore at iba-block ko na lang yung mga bagay na ganun . Itutuloy ko na lang yung ginagawa ko. kasi mahirap talaga mabuhay bilang Gay dito sa bansa natin.

  87. royo said on 11-12-2009

    naku mag-out kana sa kanila for sure titigil mga yan:D

  88. Lola said on 11-12-2009

    Ano b ang kaladalasang ending ng ganyan?

  89. vinz said on 11-12-2009

    well para saio iho/iha!!!?what ever.. laos na ang drama na ganyan ang suggest ko saio is MAGPAKATOTOO KA SA SARILE MO! SIMPLE AS THAT!!.U.

  90. Juan said on 11-12-2009

    Ang daming time na nangyayari sa amin. Tulad ng body contact sa basketball habang topless sila at pawisan. Sa p.E. sabay sabay kami nagpapalit ng uniform. Kapag nag-aakbayan kami. Minsan pa nung nagswimming kami naligo kami ng sabay sabay ng nakahubad. Di naman aq nakakaramdam ng init. Pero yung mga sitwasyon na sobrang halata yung mga signs nila. Nalilito na ako. Minsan nga nagshare kmi sa payong nung isa “sobrang cheezzy” ng pagkakaakbay sa akin. As in iparamdam ba yung katawan. Lahat naman kami may mga syota. Pero 100% sure ako. Hindi sila bading.

  91. Andrew said on 11-12-2009

    GAGA KA! SWERTE MO NGA E! lol

  92. boy abundat said on 11-12-2009

    UNAWARE/IN DENIAL ka lang…that’s the bottom line.

    instances like:
    pwd nating sabihin na super gwapo ka…kaya nababading cla sayo o ung mga guy na yun ay tlagang bading.

    & u’r too feminine, that’ s y the’yre eyeing on you…

    if ur claiming ur a st8…then magpaka TOP ka. cla ang bottom….again that’s the BOTTOM line.

  93. taekopenk said on 11-12-2009

    Tuloy mo na ayusin ang buhay mo teh kung kaya mo naman. Mahirap ang maging bading, lalo kpag tumanda na. Gusto mo bang maging Alfie Lorenzo? o kaya Boy abunda? LOL

  94. albertmartin said on 11-12-2009

    let go and be happy..

  95. boo said on 11-12-2009

    malamang naaamoy na ng mga friends mo na may pagka-girl ka kaya pinagtitripan ka ng ganyan.

    let go. ang ganda mo kaya Juan, at sila na mismo ang nagpaparamdam sa yo. there’s nothing wrong with being gay.

  96. loloy said on 11-12-2009

    stand up, kneel down, and bend over for love na teh
    habang may resources in close ka pa. hindi nman sa kabastosan, pero from how they treated you.. ewan ko lang if you have to be set discretion pa..

  97. Blue said on 11-12-2009

    totoo ba ito or nagpapatawa ka lang???

    bading ano ba? baklush ka ok??? kahit anong gawin mong iwas or ano mang kaartehan mo, sumisigaw yang kaluluwa mo na vaklush ka day! yung mga barkada mo vaklush din lahat! magsama-sama kayo mga vaklush leche! nakakainit ng ulo!!!

    halika chupain kita para matapos na yang kagagahan mo!

  98. rollane12 said on 11-12-2009

    pagsure anak. babae ka ..sinusubukan ka na ng friends mo para malaman nila kung bakla ka talaga. eh kung sinusubukan ka nila, eh hayaan mo. pagbigyan mo sila isa-isa. gow nah. kumagat sa pain nilang lahat. okey. =)) hahaha. i bless you all the love in the world.

  99. deranged said on 11-12-2009

    hahaha funny… i have lots of straight friends as compared to gay friends only a few but mas marami akong close na straight guy friends. at first tama lang ang pakisamahan namin although they have doubts or know that i am gay never nila akong priness or tinanong sa sexuality ko. ako ilang at first kasi sa isip ko pag nag out ako sa kanila baka umiwas sila sa akin. so nawala ako ng matagal at nagkita kita ulit kami ng tropa kong straight nag out ako sa kanila.. after that naging close kami nagbibiruan kami naghaharutan some of them crushie ko majority gwapo but after nilang nalaman nawala yung pagkakaroon ko ng crush sa kanila kasi after that mas naging maganda ang relationship namin at mas naging comfortable kami they are so protective of me nga eh. juan eto lang ang masasabi ko 1. magiging comfortable ang tao sa paligid mo pag comfortable ka sa sarili mo. kung nag out ka sa kanila at di ka nila natanggap ok lang yun ibig sabihin di mo sila tunay na kaibigan. 2. bading ka this is who you really are but that’s only a part of yourself it doesnt define you as a whole…. 3. its better to come out to them to know what their real intensions are, maaring nanghuhuli lang sila mabuti nang unahan mo if they still hit on you aba aba kung trip mo y not? eh di you both have something in common diba? 4. to come out or to stay in the closet is your choice, is it for my best interest? or is it going to make me happy? it’s still a decision for you to make. been there and i do understand that confusion (denial, resistance and hopefully acceptance) my experience might be different from yours… basta ikaw lang ang makakaalam what’s best for you.

  100. Juan said on 11-12-2009

    Di juan ang real name ko. Med student ako. Meron din akong mga classmate na babae. Siguro nga alam na nila. Pero alam naman nila na babae ung gusto ko. Pati kapag magkakasama kami cel. No. ko ung kinukuha ng mga babae. Nai-invite kami sa mga party dahil sa akin. Napakadaling makakuha ng babae para sa akin. Masaya ako sa sitwasyon ko ngayon. Sa atensyon na binibigay sa akin ng mga babae at bading maliban sa mga kabarkada ko. Bakit ganun kung sino pa yung umiiwas siya pa yung nilalapitan. Sa bus, Sa mall kahit di ko kakilala. Iniisip ko na lang “baka wala lang yun” .Madalas yung mga kasama ko pa ang nakakapansin dahil malabo yung mata ko. Siguro iniisip ng ibang readers nagpafantasya lang ako. Ano ba? Lalayo na lang ako sa kanila. Idi-deny ko. Hayaan ko na lang.

  101. gentle boy said on 11-12-2009

    i had same problems as you before. nagsisisi lang ako at naging late bloomer ako. dapat siguro noon ko pa tinanggap ang tunay kong pagkatao dahil marami akong pinalipas. doon din sa pagiging bading or bi ang punta mo. pwede ka namang maging discreet. kung totoo friends mo yan at marunong kang makisama, tatanggapin ka nila whoever you are. baka maging syota at matikman mo pa buong barkada mo pag nagkataon so enjoy hanggang bata ka pa.

  102. Ronnie said on 11-12-2009

    I concur on Ayesha’s statement. =)

  103. imladris said on 11-12-2009

    I have a sinking feeling this might be a bogus letter.

  104. dynonel said on 11-12-2009

    hay naku. nakaka inggit man basahin at isipin pero MR. JUAN, magpaka tatag ka. MAGPAKA LALAKI ka kasi madami ng bading sa mundo. please

  105. Boyz said on 11-12-2009

    Ahhhmmm eto tlga serious na ha…. Hula ko may alam na sila sa tunay mong pagkatao, maybe hinuhuli k na lng nila at maybe lhat tlga cla, im not sure, ay may gusto din sayo… hhmmm gamitin mo n lng ung pkramdam mo, kpg naramdaman mong nag usap2 cla pra hulihin ka edi layuan mo n cla kase prang pinaglalaruan ka na kpg ganun… then kpg nramdaman mong gusto ka din pla nilang lhat edi masaya…

  106. Boyz said on 11-12-2009

    GO GO GO…. Lucky mo kaya…. Hehehe TANGA DI MO BA HALATA NA NAHAHALATA KA NA NILA =]

  107. herbs said on 11-12-2009

    oh shit. i cant stop but giggle at this post hahahaha

  108. herbs said on 11-12-2009

    go lang ng go! 😀

  109. diosdaddy said on 11-12-2009

    Parehas tayo, I used to be that but when I opened up with my straight friends 9 years ago(barkada ko sila since high school), pinagtawanan lang ako. Sabi nila alam namin, we just like you so much that u treated urself as one of the boys so we did the same. Moreover, since walang krimen nangyayari kaya until now magbarkada pa rin kami.

    Tell them, and see kung gaano kabigat pala ng dinadala mo tapos wala na man palang malaking issue

  110. dekadek said on 11-12-2009

    lam mo, magpakatotoo ka na lang. para di ka nahihirapan. agree guys? apir!!!

  111. jam said on 11-12-2009

    I laughed a bit when I read this…

    And medyo nag “wishful thinking” na sana ako na lng nasa katayuan ni Juan… hihihii

    Kidding aside, my advice for you Juan is: “Just let go….”

    and

    “Spread your wings and fly… Butterfly…” ;p

  112. Plutocopy said on 11-12-2009

    tama c carl…i think it would be much better if you will tell them nalang sa totoo…pag d ka nagtapat sa kanila, hindi ka talaga ma release, it depends on them if mattangap ka nila or hindi, have been there done that…regarding din sa mga nagparamdam sayo, just be stiff, pag wala kang planung lumantad, eh d e rebuke mu cla pero if gusto kang makalaya sa guilt then, it depends on you on how youre going to control things…its all up to u but if im on your shoes, i will go for it, patulan mu cla…seriously …y not? right? yan ay pag gusto mu clang maka sex partner pero pag hindi, eh d huwag mu pilitin sarili mu …no matter how hard you tried to change yourself, you can really feel that weird feeling sa kapwa lalaki…u cant escape it…face the reality…

  113. Nympho said on 11-12-2009

    teh,,,ang haba nang hair mo

  114. pacer150 said on 11-12-2009

    ei naku juan, kung juan nga pangalan mo which i doubt.sumasama ka nga sa straight, eh di ba kabadingan pa rin nasa isip mo kasi pinagnanasaan mo sila.patulan mo na lang lahat ng papatol sa yo.kahit anong gawin mo bading ka talaga.take it from me kasi naexperience ko maging confused,i enjoyed sex with women but i enjoy it more with men.at sa men ako naiinlove ng todo.kung ako sayo, wag ka ng tumulad sa akin na late na nag out.sa mga bakla, lalo na pag nasa abroad ka, pagdating mo ng 30 hindi ka na mabenta.so go out at wag na yang pa straight straight kuno na yan.pero kung gusto mo magpa ka discreet, ok rin lang.i respect you for that.ang pagiging bading is not a choice.it’s a choice if you wanna be out or not.so you better decide.the bottom line is, it’s very hard to pretend to be the person that you are not.ingats!!

  115. carl said on 11-12-2009

    gaga!!! matagal ng alam ng “straight” friends mo kung ano ka talaga!!! hahaha!!! alam mo? walang straight ang magbibiro ng ganun sa kapwa nya straight, unless may hinala sila na bading yun!!! ganyan kaya ginagawa namin dun sa barkada namin na iniisip namin na bading!!! at di dahil sumasama ka sa straight guys e magiging straight ka na rin!!! para kang tanga!!! di kung ganun, sumama ka na lang sa mga straight na babae para maging gurl ka na rin!!! kaasar ka!!! dapat sa yo pinapalo sa pwet ng matauhan ka!!!

    • john said on 09-08-2011

      this is so true,, i agree on this. i was asking my straight friend as well way back hs why he is touching my crotch and his answer was to test me, and til now he is not aware im gay. so he told me that honestly.

  116. iino said on 11-12-2009

    it’s just a matter of choice. either you stick to forcing yourself to be straight, or give in to temptations.

    pero kung ako…. gow na gurl! wag palagpasin ang chance! -chos!

  117. pot said on 11-12-2009

    stay strong…. don’t let your guard down, ika nga.
    it seems to me now that, well, they’re like us…. pero you can never be too sure. baka kasi in the end ikaw ang gumawa ng wrong move and poof…. koko krunch.
    i have questions though…
    ….
    galing ka ba sa isang all-boys school?

    and, do you think you like them? or at least one of them? kasi if you do, at gumagawa xa ng move, why not di ba? joke. ;p

  118. migz receno said on 11-12-2009

    nakakaloka!!! go for the gold! joke! haha

  119. Ayesha said on 11-12-2009

    You are already gay, darling. You are just denying it. Those signs would not be even an issue to you if you don’t have a hint of homosexuality.

    On the other hand, your friends might have already sensed your diva personality that is why, they want to catch you flapping your wings.

    It’s either, you flap them out for the world to see or you cut them altogether.

    Tingnan natin sino ang masasaktan, loka

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