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I received this message from a gay man, not any ordinary gay man, but a deaf gay man. I publish it here without editing. Let us try to understand him, and help him with his situation.

* * *

Migs, good day!
I am sad because I am ugly and chubby. Somebody don’t like me chubby and ugly as daddy.
I am single forever. Before I was ten ex-boyfriend. I realized that ex-boyfriend. I don’t like fool lover. Because of miscommunication.

I am Deaf with sign language. I graduates De La Salle-College of St. Benilde. Tonite, I am working professor for the deaf college.
I am so glad with friend and gimick of gay/lesbian but nothing fall in love. Very patience my life. Never leave with friend.

Last Saturday, I visited Faheritt, Q.C. I observation many guys in F’s. The Cute and Cute guys is treat sex but not same old man. They though don’t like old man.
I learn from them. Hindi kasama sex tayo. My friend went to again sex. but for me “zero-sex”. Its is meaning of walang sex tayos.
I feel sad and lonely. I never experience serious relationship. I have many reason of serious relationship is very sensitive.
I don’t just serious relationship.

Ask you think many cute and handsome don’t like old man? Why you interest romance vs relationship?

– JPS

Comments (26)

  1. JP said on 31-03-2011

    Hi! I am really I make exaggerates.

  2. Adi said on 05-07-2010

    Ahahahaha. Thank you, but no, JP. I’m all Benilde’ed out.

    Thank you for dropping by, sa blog ko. More power, to you. =)

  3. jp said on 28-06-2010

    Adi, interest enroll sign language in Benilde?

  4. Adi said on 23-06-2010

    I agree with palma tayona. I have a friend who’s currently studying at the SDEAS Benilde (that’s the School for the Deaf). Whilw she isn’t deaf, she would like to learn sign language in an effort to understand a cousin, who is.

    One of the things she told me is that deaf people do not sign like we talk (or write). Andaming shortcuts. Pati mga articles (A, An. The) nawawala na.

    My heart goes to JPS. Oo nga, ang hirap siguro para sa kanila ano..?

    Just… hang in there. If ever you need someone to talk to, andito naman ako.

    Anyways I also attended Benilde, years back. La lang. Sharing.

  5. jp said on 31-05-2010

    Jake, Don’t worry I can do something. Every Saturday I talkative in gateway. Sometime I saw many bisexual and gay is hearing groups. I can’t be join to hearing why because I feel not well close the hearing bisexual and gay.
    I saw someone is very nice and cute. I like him but they did not type me. I feel happy with deaf groups.
    My deaf friend told me many reason eyeball in gateway. I don’t know what happen to us.
    I just adviser him. Don’t think of them. Bahala ka…
    Huwag ikaw takot. Masaya tayo!

  6. jake said on 31-05-2010

    maybe its deaf grammar english, (I believe there is such if you get my point) anyway, it would be healthier if you’d be able join group such as mggff, you dont have to go through this alone, you just need a channel to broaden your horizon.

  7. jp said on 25-05-2010

    Sorry,
    I read website. I am sad and depression about structure English grammar.
    I will apply English Grammar.
    I don’t think risk of life.

  8. jp said on 25-05-2010

    Hi! Everyone…
    I read online news. Im really I am deaf. I experience many times happen on my life.
    I never leave with friend.

  9. RonTab said on 24-05-2010

    Sus, nagpapaliwanag pa , e talagang ang lupit ninyo. Parang ang sasama ng mga nag comment, nalait pati propesyon nya. Kakagigil pero hanggang dito na lang pagpatol ko sa inyo.
    To you dear letter sender, di ka nagiisa. Sa maraming bagay, pantay lang tayo.
    Let’s keep supporting each other with open mindedness.

  10. Edgar Portalan said on 23-05-2010

    Hurrah and thank you Migs for enlightening us about this topic…I agree with you 100 percent….I must admit I have become somewhat judgmental…sensya na tao lang….eh kasi wala pa naman kaming nakakasamang mga ganyang klase ng tao kaya we don’t know the difference….but then I beg to disagree sa sinabi ni maximo and let me quote, “when you have nothing good to say, say nothing” …..and yet sinegundahan pa ni palma tayona…..eh kung hindi ako nagsalita at nag-comment paano namin malalaman ang katotohanan debah?…..if I just say nothing at what seems to be wrong…..at least nagkaruon ng explanation….at para saan pa ang comment section ni Migs kung hindi ka rin lang maglalabas ng saloobin mo debah?….it’s a free for all comment……and mga sisters, may positive din sa pagda-doubt…..hindi lang ito negative…..lalo na kapag may hinala ka sa isang panloloko o panlalamang…..at least kapag may doubt ka,gagawa ka ng paraan para mag-imbestiga, right?…..hindi yung oo ka lang ng oo…dahil baka hindi mo alam eh niloloko ka na pala di ka pa rin nagda-doubt debah……because aminin natin….sa gusto mo man o hindi…may mga tao talaga ngayon na nanloloko lang o nanlalamang sa kanyang kapwa….and you better arm yourself with a doubting attitude para di ka malamangan tama?…..di laging agree ka sa sasabihin ng kapwa mo okay?……peace tayo mga sisters……comment lang ito he he he he…….

  11. Fritz said on 23-05-2010

    Salamat doon sa mga nag-explain kung bakit ganoon yung construction ng letter. Now I know why.

    Pasensya na kung may na-offend man ako… in my defense, I was stupid 😛

    To JP, good luck and I hope you find your partner in the future 🙂

  12. ares in uae said on 22-05-2010

    SAPAKAN NA LANG!

  13. erik said on 21-05-2010

    i like this one! let’s face it..one of the most lamentable landscape of gay life is its over emphasis on beauty, youth and wealth. and to be fair..hindi lang naman tlga sa gay society sya prevailing..it’s a harsh reality..

    tungkol naman sa grammar..ang alam ko nga is my iba silang set of rules and manner of speaking..ganyan po tlga sila magsulat..my sister who’s born with cerebral palsy used to attend a special school for disabled and dun ko siya natutuhan..

    to JP, pray ka lang..actually hindi lang ikaw ang nakakaranas ng problema sa pag-ibig. even those people you would refer to as “normal” are having the same dilemma like myself. am turning 23 next month and never pa din ako nagkaron ng boyfriend or partner. maybe you’re looking in a wrong direction. just wait..and kung wla mang dumating..life goes on! ikaw pa din yan. the same JP. not havng a boyfriend or partner does not make you any less of a person. love yourself. kasi madaming nagmamahal sa yo. GOD BLESS JP!

  14. migs said on 21-05-2010

    This discussion is rich, I like it a lot. Let me clarify though that the letter is authentic. JPS, the letter sender, is a regular here at MGG, and is also a Facebook friend of mine. I tend to like the suggestion from Maximo. Wouldn’t it be much healthier for all of us to see through the form (grammar, “disability”, etc.) and recognize the human being behind the letter, asking for help and compassion? I wonder how differently we would react if the same message is articulated in impeccable english grammar. I would also like to say that we do not need to condemn those who questioned the letter or the letter sender. We all have our moments of doubt, moments when we get misaligned with our naturally good and well-meaning nature. I like this discussion here because we are all learning from each other.

  15. palma tayona said on 21-05-2010

    On the topic of being Deaf:
    I just finished working on a book about being deaf and of the Deaf community, please allow me to copy-paste here 8 points to UNDERSTAND THE DEAF COMMUNITY from that publication:
    1. From the medical point of view, deafness is a disability but Deaf people see themselves as belonging to a community with its own UNIQUE LANGUAGE and CULTURE.
    2. While there are Deaf families, this is very rare. In fact, 9 out of 10 Deaf people are born to hearing parents.
    3. Most people think that the proper term to refer to Deaf people is “hearing-impaired.” However, Deaf people would rather be called “Deaf” since they do not feel they are impaired as human beings, nor are they mute and definitely not dumb.
    4. Lipreading is a skill that Deaf people have to train in. Unless one is trained in this skill, lipreading is difficult.
    5. Deaf people can’t hear but they have voices. Their vocal chords are intact, thus they can produce sounds such as when they laugh. Deaf people just choose not to use their voices since they can’t hear themselves anyway and worry that they may sound funny.
    6. Deaf people feel as normal as any other person even if they can’t hear. More often than not, it is the hearing person who feels sorry for the Deaf because he or she thinks Deaf people are “lacking” or “impaired” (compared to them).
    7. Signing by Deaf Filipinos or Filipino Sign Language (FSL) is DIFFERENT FROM SPOKEN Filipino or English. It is a language that is not based on sound and uses the hands, face and body to communicate.
    8. Deaf people have their own stories, poems, jokes and folklore. These are referred to as Deaf Literature, Sign Literature or Visual Literature because it is in their language.
    ————-
    On the point of some individuals above criticizing the ability of the Deaf individual who wrote his message, please… DO NOT USE spoken Language or Grammar AS REFERENCE to correct written communication with the Deaf. It is like saying Japanese should be written, read and/or spoken using the rules of English. It just doesn’t work that way.

    ————-

    about the writer’s concern on being a ‘misfit’, about being ‘sad and lonely’ and ‘never experience(ing) a serious relationship’… dude, at this day and age, there’s a solution to your dilemma. it’s what all people in the business of marketing know and it’s called ‘finding one’s proper market niche’. Go to places and/or connect with people who share the same values as you. if you say you are ‘chubby’, go to those groups of chubby-chasers. if you say you’re a ‘mature daddy’, there are groups of people who like older guys (talk to Fritz).

    It’s all simply about finding the right group to swing in, with or above. 🙂

    cheers!

    ——–

    To all Gay men or boys: be kind to those who are different than you. For every person who snickers and points a finger at another he sees as less than him, there’s also someone else who snickers and points back.

    Like what Maximo, said: when you have nothing good to say, say nothing.

  16. maximo katakutan said on 21-05-2010

    @edgar portalan: i can’t explain why. probably they don’t want to change their grammar in writing, so as not to affect their grammar in sign language. i am too shy to ask deaf people why their grammar is – for the lack of word – strange.

    besides, he’s a professor for the deaf college. probably he teaches sign language. he’s probably really good in teaching sign language, but not the english language.

    when i was working abroad, i have met several deaf people and their grammar is consistent with my friend and cousin – also with this guy.

    i say, drop the topic, it’s not going anywhere. the guy has something to say. look beyond the grammar and him being a professor, and provide positive feedback about his concern, instead of being too negative about him – yes, doubt is a negative attitude.

    growing up, i always believe in – when you have nothing good to say, say nothing.

  17. Edgar Portalan said on 21-05-2010

    Hmmmmm…if that’s the case,how can he become a good professor if mali mali ang pag construct niya ng sentence di ba?…….I’m not against deaf gay man…I’m just saying there’s something wrong here….siguro kung waiter siya o salesman o designer puwede pa…pero kung professor ka at ganyan ka magsulat …..woohhh…..debah? peace….

    • PJ said on 20-04-2012

      hehe… you’re telling a word peace yet you are saying those words… such a prejudice… be mature enough to be a man…

  18. maximo katakutan said on 21-05-2010

    i have a friend and a cousin who are deaf. the way they construct their sentences is way different than what people who can speak does.

    Just by comparing emails from my deaf cousin and deaf friend, i’d say that this is indeed written by a deaf person.

    their grammar is how they speak in sign language.

  19. Edgar Portalan said on 21-05-2010

    tama ka Fritz..this letter seems a fake…a graduate of De La Salle and a professor pa mandin pero hmmmmm….I don’t think na kapag deaf ka eh apektado na rin ang grammar mo at wisdom….there’s something odd about this letter.

  20. Jedd said on 21-05-2010

    You can’t change how others look at you. You can only change how you look at yourself. Exercise, watch what you eat, and take better care of yourself. Not only will that take care of the ‘chubby’ part, it’ll make you live longer and look a few years younger as well.

    How old are you? 40? 50? If you’re that old hanging out at bathhouses should be the last thing on your mind. You won’t find relationships and romance there for crying out loud!

  21. Fritz said on 20-05-2010

    *makes you feel safe when you’re with them.

  22. Fritz said on 20-05-2010

    First, his letter is very interesting. Hindi naman sa pagiging jerk o ano, pero according to him he graduated from De La Salle- College of St. Benilde and he’s a professor but his communication skills are very problematic. I know he’s deaf but his grammar shouldn’t be impaired by not being able to hear… which makes me think if this letter is legit.

    Second, there are guys out there who like older guys. Sabi nga ng mga Fabcasters in one of their Fabcasts, it’s just a matter of finding your market (o yan Migs, may natutunan ako dito hehe). I’m 21 and I’m attracted to guys older than me. There’s just something about an older guy that makes you feel self when you’re with them.

  23. mingmeows said on 20-05-2010

    nacurious ako kung paano nya natype ito. parang hindi mano-mano eh.
    worry don’t dude coz we’re here. sali ka sa mggff or better yet sali ka sa mga geb with miggs.

  24. jrc said on 20-05-2010

    deaf man……..love nurse tau un!heheheh
    pm me k break ko lng usap tau..

  25. vince said on 20-05-2010

    It is most unfortunate & a sad reality that youth & beauty precede all other factors in determining one’s desirability within the gay community.

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