On this question — I am aware I’m very biased. I’m good friends with all my ex’s. From what I hear among my friends, this is not the case for many. This is, in summary, what our model-reader friend here is asking in his letter. Read on and share your thoughts. (I’ll keep quiet this time, as my answer’s quite obvious.)
Im 23, around 5â€™7. I just recently broke up with my boyfriend of 4 months.
the thing is, I have been single for 4 years before I met him.
yep, 4 years. yes, I would go on dates, i have M.Uâ€™s.
suffice to say, in that 4 years, there were a lot of people I dated and there were a couple who almost made me commit. but i never did. because i never commit half baked.
Iâ€™m a part time model, during one taping for a tv series, I met this other model, relatively younger than me. Iâ€™m 23, he was 20.
I thought we were just going to be friends, he will be handled by star magic soon (at that time he was with viva) so i never thought that he would be into guys.
then we started texting until we became a couple.
it was his first time with me. I would like to believe that heâ€™s bisexual but he keeps telling me —
â€œryan, kasalanan tong ginagawa naten, pero mahal kita. mahal na mahal kitaâ€. to the point that he cries when he says that he loves me.
yes, we do it. we have sex. but we take it one step at a time. but he enjoys being the receiver which caught me by surprise.
he was very sweet, and everything that was lacking with my previous dates, my previous relationships with men, he was able to fulfill.
i was very happy. but as with this industry,
we cant be an item publicly.
so i think that’s the main problem, when the agency and his classmates started speculating he got scared.
he really has big dreams of becoming an actor. so big are his dreams that he chose to do a fashion shoot for a women’s magazine instead of celebrating our monthsary.
as a model, i understand that work is work. when you get a big break, you take it.
but i started feeling something different. i dont know how to put this, but he became cold.
im not stupid, i kinda knew he was having a hard time hiding our relationships from everyone else.
and just like that, after his class, while i was in the gym, he texted me â€œit’s over, this is what’s best for us, you’ll understand me in timeâ€.
i did not cry. because boys dont cry! haha
but i was sad, but not devastated. i kind of saw it coming.
it’s just painful for me. i took a chance with him. i was so guarded for 4 years and i thought we would last. i was willing to hide our relationship forever.
if other models can do it, i’m sure we can.
but he gave up so easily. i guess he was also pressured with school plus his modelling career.
it just feels so unfair. i’m also busy as hell but i always have time for him. i never denied him my time.
if i have a go-see, a meeting with a manager, i would tell them i’m not available just to see him.
but i guess i have to be strong.
i still have a shoot to do which i consider my biggest break.
i still have my friends with me.
but i will not deny that i miss him.
it’s crazy, i can’t believe we even made out so many times in a tv network’s restroom during taping breaks!
i tried to fix things with him, but we just ended up fighting.
i asked him one last time, do you want me back?
he said no. i said, that’s your decision.
now here’s my real problem:
he broke up with me right?
but he wants to remain friends?
i mean, fuck off man! that’s just really unfair right?
i mean, he doesn’t want the commitment with me, but he wants the convenience of having me around without the commitment.
i said, â€œi will not let you use meâ€
“iâ€™d rather be out of your life than be used by youâ€.
so that’s what i did.
DO YOU THINK I MADE THE RIGHT DECISION?