I love Enchong Dee!
Let me start by saying that you are an inspiration. It’s my first time reading through your blog and i must say you are a great guru to us ‘gays’. I admit that it’s hard for me to enter the word gay in this email and associate it with me. I may sound like the typical closeted/in-denial/straight-acting guy but i believe i myself is a story that should be told.
My name is paul and im 26, i grew up in a very big family with 22 cousins, 10 uncles and aunties combined, 3 older sisters and we all live together in a big family compound (an apartment complex owned by my grandparents).
Growing up in that kind of environment leaves no space for oddliness or abnormality. We were always compared to each other within the same age group. Achivements, be it sports or academics, my relatives always has a way of making us feel that we kids back then are in a competition with not only ourselves but with each other.
So for me, i can’t act differently as i act as a younger brother and an elder brother to my boy cousins. They look up to me because i have exceptional academics and i excel in sports. From the time that i was in highschool, i already had a hint of what i may become but i tried so hard to suppress that thought of becoming someone that my family wouldn’t want me to be. It was really hard for me as i was enrolled in an exclusive school for boys then. I already had boy crushes but never physically leak it to others. I made friends with the athletes, the rich kids and those who are popular in their own ways. I was part of a group that was respected and feared in and out of our school.
â€Ž”When you stand and share your story in an empowering way, your story will heal you and your story will heal somebody else.” â€” Iyanla Vanzant
Below is the first email I received today. It’s from my friend Dennis (not his real name). He was a fuck buddy for a short time. Then we became good friends. When I became quite active in the HIV advocacy he was one of the first folks I tried to persuade to take the test. It took a while for him to agree. It turned out he was positive. He promised to write about being a person living with HIV. Today, he sent me this. Read on.
Magiisang taon na nang malaman kong HIV positive ako, pero hindi pa rin ako naiyak. Hindi ko naman pinipigilan, kung tutuusin nga ay pinipilit ko pa dahil yun ang dapat. Kaya ako nagsusulat ngayon para maiyak, at sana pag natapos ko to, gusto ko humahagulgol na ko. Hanggang ngayon, wala akong pinagsabihan nito, ayoko silang malungkot para sakin.
Siguro dahil ako yung tipo ng taong madaling tanggapin ang mga bagay na hindi ko na kayang baguhin. Lumaki akong positibo ang pananaw sa buhay, at lagi kong napapatunayan na ang mga hindi magandang pangyayari ay may magandang dahilan.
One thing I’m so thankful for, being in almost constant company of other gay men, is that I can enjoy so-called “music for the culturati” and find others enjoying the same, getting even just a bit giddy over the same song otherwise unappreciated by my straight friends. Oh, I love my gay friends!
I would just like to tell you of an unbelievable misfortune that befell me. It happened to me because I was gay, It happened to me because I wanted love, It happened to me because there are so many heartless people in the world, and so many naive people (like me).
I am young and inexperienced, I have been a closeted gay guy all my life. Never had a BF (or GF), never kissed anyone, never dated anyone. My youth was completely love-less. Which is an irony because I am an extremely loving person.
I am a fresh college graduate, and I come from a considerably privileged background. I’ve had my hands in the stock market and I have made significant money for myself in my first year after college. In addition, I have concluded a big real-eastate deal as a sales agent earning a large commission. I had been both a stock market Investor and a real-estate agent in my first year after college.
I’ve made 200k on my own, on my first year after college.
It was 9 months ago from now that my unbelievable misfortune started. I was lazily browsing through a male escort blog admiring the possibilities. I’ve never had any experience, so the mere thought of seeing a guy shirtless in person fascinated me. Yeah… I was that deprived.
I recognized one guy, not because I was attracted, there was absolutely no attraction, but I recognized him… from a bikini contest album I saw on facebook. Believing most of the guys in this blog are fake, I contacted this one guy to ask him if he’s the same person from the contest. If he is genuine and a real person.
I recall him to be rude, not even entertaining my offer of a free lunch. Feeling the weight of my pocket, I irresponsibly thought of offering him 1k free goodwill money. But before I could type that, I received a text from him saying his rate was 3k. I was stunned how expensive this ‘rate’ is. But feeling dumb and bold, I told him i’d match that 3k as a goodwill money, free money, I want no service in return just his goodwill towards me. I sent the money first thing the next morning.
I’ll be in Cebu on September 22, 2012 to provide an initial briefing to potential volunteers of Love Yourself. It will be the first area of expansion of Love Yourself (TLY) outside Metro Manila. I would like to encourage those who are willing to help our gay/bisexual community to please join us and be among the pioneering members of TLY-Cebu. The only hard requirement is a big heart who wants to help — no need for previous volunteer work experience. Just the heart, that’s enough!
Join us, register here: http://www.loveyourself.ph/p/join.html
We restart the discussion with Jason, our dear idealistic peanut gallery member, challenging the “open relationship” setup of Joel & Dan — “are you not enough for each other?”
And for the rest of the fabcast, we continue building up on our collective but quite diverse understanding of gay relationships. Come join the discussion!
â€œLove Me For A Reasonâ€ by Boyzone
â€œLove Is For Singingâ€ by the Apo Hiking Society
â€œTurn Up The Radioâ€ by Madonna
â€œA Different Point Of Viewâ€ by the Pet Shop Boys
All Fabcasters have jowa at this moment and we discuss issues swirling about being “in a relationship” — this first part tackle’s McVie and Dan’s being in an open relationship. Keri ninyo bang makipag-do sa iba kahit na may jowa ka? Pakinggan!