Manila Gay Guy
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[ Part 1 here. ]

2 AM – chat sa Grindr.
“O, you’re still online.”
“Yeah.”
“Malalim na ang gabi, gising ka pa.”
“Ikaw, ba’t gising ka pa rin?”
“Kadarating ko lang sa bahay, I drove for a friend.”
“Wow ambait. Can you drive for me too?”
“I can drive you… crazy.”
“LOL. Serious. As in now.”
“Sure. San mo gusto pumunta?”
“I don’t know.”
“Sige ako bahala.”
“But I’m sleepy.”
“I promise to drive you back to your hotel kapag inantok ka habang kasama ako. Ano, game?”
“Hmmm… we can, but I can’t promise I won’t sleep on you.”
“Hmmmm… sleep on me? Double meaning, I like that.”
“Ay, sorry, mali yata ang English ko.”

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Dear Migs!

Just wanted to commend on the success of your blog, Im one of the regular readers and comfortable reading your entries and comments and personally waiting again for you to buzzed me again when you’re in my area (San Francisco). I never thought that one day I will write to ask for an advice.

I joined a Christian community to a thought that I can be change, not….. though im trying. Just when I thought I will live a straight life when I met in the community Mac-Mac just a regular guy and not my usual type as I described him to my friends. But the guy is oozing with sex appeal. Then I remember a saying that you will never find your ideal person but instead you will be given the opposite of it and I think he is the one. Not my ideal but yet i like the person. Now the catch… he is straight again straight!

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Hello Migs. I have been a subscriber for a couple of years – in fact, when you started your chat box, we got to chat for a bit. I’m from the Bay Area, you told me you lived here for a while. Well, I finally have reason to write you a letter – the title says it all.

Yes, I have been partnered with “Dee” for 10 years now. He’s an American, a lawyer, divorced twice (he thought he was bisexual, but finally came out gay and wouldn’t have anything more to do with women), and have been told that he has Richard Gere looks. I agree. We met when I was still living in Manila and he was visiting for a conference. It was love at first sight, a la Miss Saigon. But like Chris leaving Kim, he left too – only, he came back a year later.

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Hi Migs,

I’m Bashful, 27, and a reader of your blog for about two years now. I am writing to ask for your opinion about a taboo matter: exhibitionism.

I know, my nickname indicates otherwise, but aside from the risk of being exposed to the rest of the world–especially on the web–I have no problem showing my “baby anaconda” to other guys who are simply horny peeping toms. Blame it on today’s technology; in this decade almost everyone has a digicam, web cam, camera phone, etc. I am not a street flasher, but I have masturbated (or appeared with a hard-on) in internet chat rooms, and in public places such as school, public transport, malls, workplace, etc.

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[Here’s a letter / contribution of Coffee Boy]

“Hey, just wanted to ask, are you gay, bisexual or something?” then I replied, “that… I’m not particularly sure of… I have a gf, but to be honest, I enjoy ‘it’ with men. No labels. Ikaw?” – then I got cold silence as a reply.

* * *

It was the 30th day of my birthday month, though still in the middle of the week, the following day was the end of Ramadan and thus was declared a holiday. I got nothing to do that payday afternoon and so I decided to just hang around. Walking along Timog / Tomas Morato area with no one and with literally nothing to do, I decided to go to one of my favorite spa places and pamper myself with an hour and a half long massage.

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Hi Migs. Call me Ethan. This is the first time I’m writing your site, but have been an avid reader of yours since 2006. It has been a source of comfort and relief for me, knowing that I’m not alone in my struggles in this world. Anyway, the reason I’m writing is because I too have a problem. I think I’m in love, for the first time in my life. Let me explain.

It started almost two weeks ago. I ‘met’ him, of all places, in a porn site. He saw my profile, messaged me, asked me for my MSN, and the rest, as they say, is history. At first, we chatted irregularly, once every few days or so. On 17 August, however, everything took a turn for the better. We started messaging each other more; sometimes we’d last anywhere from 3 to 4 hours, just sitting and sending each other messages. I became enamored with him; everything about him was perfect! We had the same interests: history, politics, books, and all this for a guy who was 18 (I’m 19). We even shared some interesting commonalities; he and I are both altar boys, we both come from big families, and we are both firmly planted in the closet. In no time at all, I think we became too sweet to each other — and we’ve never even met!

The trouble started a few days ago.

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How do you rekindle a slowly dying flame? Read on and share your thoughts on Baz’s predicament below.

* * *

hi migs,

i’ve just been recently hooked on your site.. i am online most of the time and one night when i was bored i came across your site.. i think destiny brought me here. you see. i’m not out to anyone… maybe forever.. i’ve got my family, career, and reputation to protect.. not that i don’t respect anyone who has been out, but i just can’t deny the fact that we are still living in a very narrow-minded world.

i have a husband… we’ve been together for so long now. for me he is perfect, the kind of person who would compliment me in every way.. i am so, in my most simple term ‘maldito’ , in more ways than one, he can talk sense out of me. we are each other’s rock.. we love each other dearly and our trust for each other was never broken or threatened in any way.. when we are together, we have our own world, it coexists with the ones around us..which i think is great knowing that we are growing as a couple and as individuals.. we have hot sex all the time.. he’s my ultimate hunk.. very goodlooking. tall and most of all intelligent.. not boasting, but i am too, i just want to say it straight to be able to gain answers clearly which brings me to my predicament…

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MIRC, one boring weekend.

ASL?

20 m qc.

I hesitated for a while. Bagets. Too young. But what the heck.

You okay with an older guy?

Tito? Kuya? Hehehe. Pic pls.

And the customary photo swap transpired.

Hmmm, I told myself. Cute guy. Tall. Muscular but not bulky. Most of all, a moreno pretty face. Alluring smile. May potential.

I was aggressive. Wanna meet?

He showered me with questions. When? Where? What do you want to do? Then it came down to, QC ako eh. Malayo.

I brushed his issue aside, may kotse ako. I can pick you up in QC.

In a few minutes, I was ready to go. Susunduin ko nga ang bata. Hatid Sundo. Sundo’t Hatid, I wished, hahaha!

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candle to perfidy A week ago, sometime around midnight, I was driving along Roxas Boulevard with my friends, and while I forget the topic of our animated, energetic conversation that time, I remember I was searching for this word in my mind. Nasa dulo ng dila ko. It escaped me at that moment, and I thought it was the most appropriate word to use for whatever my friends and I were talking about. Now I remember it: Perfidy.

Perfidy [pur-fi-dee]: (noun) deliberate breach of faith or trust; faithlessness; treachery.

Today it suddenly struck me again, and this time, I remembered the word. Not only do I remember the word but I remember the concept. I lived it several years ago. That time I had a partner and he was my first. It started out pretty well, until I did some naughty things.

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