Writing you this letter was actually a decision I had to make. Not that it’s hard to do but maybe I just thought of asking for a little help from you.

My name is Robert and I have been an avid reader of your blog for a long time now. I found out about your blog while I was scanning a certain magazine. And from then on, I got interested in reading your articles. The reason why I’m writing you this letter it’s because I’m having this “difficulty”, a situation where I don’t know what to do. I have never talked to anybody about this yet and hopefully I could get some piece of opinion from you.

Geo and I have been friends since early last year. We work at the same place but now we work in different departments as I recently got a promotion about a month ago. We recently just became quite close because of one sad event. Geo just broke up 3 weeks ago with his long time girlfriend, Kris, who happens to be one of my closest friends as well.. When they were still together, I always look up to these two guys since they are always the first ones to save my butt at work and their one of the reasons why I got the promotion I wanted. And, yes, their break-up greatly affected me as well. After that sad event, Geo had suddenly started texting me, asking me if there were any plans of going on a night out to drink with some friends which was very unusual. Geo is the type of guy who doesn’t really like going out to get some drink. From then on, we suddenly got closer than before. We never talked about how sad the break up was or whatever happened between him and Kris, instead we just drink the night away and have fun while talking about a lot of stuff. Yes, it made me wonder why Geo chose me as his company. First, he knows I’m gay (although I don’t look like one); Second, he knows I like him; and Third? I don’t know… I really don’t know. But a few days after, he answered my question when one of our friends noticed our sudden closeness.

“Parehas kasi kami ng mga hilig eh. Isa pa di naman to mahirap kausap lalo na pag inuman ang usapan…”

Yup, he says we have the same interests (apart from girls that is) which I then noticed as time passed by. And by the tone of his voice, I could say he really needed me just to be there for him in his saddest.

Here is where the problem starts. The more we get closer, the more my feelings start to develop. I tried denying it at first but I figured out I can’t. I suddenly noticed that everytime I’m having a chat with friends, I never forget to mention his name every time. When we’re not together, I sometimes think about me and him getting together (which I thought was very absurd). Yes, my thoughts were pleasant and alarming at the same time. Why alarming? Because people know for a fact that I am close to both him and his ex-gf. That’s the reason why I said I haven’t told anyone about this yet. I don’t want them to think that I’m that gay slut between Geo and Kris.. When I got to watch MMK last night, I told myself ayokong mangyari to sakin. Although there were no evidences, or chances so to speak, of them getting back, people still want them to reconcile and continue their 4-year relationship. And to say, I am actually one of those people who’d want to see them back together.
One time, when Geo and I ate somewhere with a friend after drinking the whole night, the conversation struck me.

Friend: “ba’t parati na kayong magkasama? Baka magkatuluyan na kayo ha!”
Me: “bakit naman hindi?” I jokingly answered.

It was at that moment when I heard him answer “why not?” at the same time. We just laughed about it while I was thinking ba’t nga naman talaga hindi? It wasn’t the first time he joked about liking me or about us being together. There was even one time when he joked around and told our friend malay mo, baka ang type ko na ay si… Robert??

They say jokes are half meant, well, 3/4s meant for some. I kinda understand why he’s so at ease with fooling people about what’s going on between us. Maybe it’s because he trusts me enough knowing that I won’t humiliate him in front of friends. That’s why I could say love gets too confusing because you know you’re about to fall but you also know you can’t because you’re not supposed to. I can’t blame myself for liking, or should I say falling for him because physically, Geo is very attractive. Tall and bald, just the way I like it. Personality wise, he’s such a gentleman, he’s very intelligent, he has such a great humor, he sings well and maybe the list still goes on.

I don’t wanna compromise the friendship that we have right now just because of my unbalanced thoughts. I enjoy every moment I have with him because I can never tell when’s this friendship gonna end. I know there are a lot of people talking behind me and I’m afraid Geo would start listening to them someday. I also wouldn’t want to look like the big slut who took away Geo from Kris. I know I’m a slut but maybe now’s not a good time.

I really hope you could respond to this personally or in whichever way you can. I just needed to vent this out to somebody just to make sure my mind is still in its sane state. I wanna know if continuing this friendship with him is still healthy for both of us or not. Well, thanks for taking time in reading this crap.

xoxo
Much Love
Robert

Dear Robert,

What a timely letter you sent me. Thank you. I feel that a lot of our experiences are both common (shared and similar) and unique (not exactly the same as anything else). I can identify with you, yet I know your situation is also very unique because of the people involved. So let me share my thoughts freely, and I’ll let you pick what you feel is useful, and leave others that are not behind.

Seems to me that your dilemma is about getting clarity about your relationship with Geo. Kasi naman, ang sarap ng feeling being with him di ba? Nakakakilig lalo na yang mga jokes (half or three-quarters meant) na parang may laman, mga bonding times together, etc. I can feel from the way you wrote your letter that you enjoy this thing that you have with Geo. Savor it, Robert. I say live with the present, savor every emotion, every breath, every moment you are with him; make the most of each meeting, each drinking session, enjoy the friendship as if it will end the next moment. Ngunit imbis na panggigilan mo, subukan mong maging mas payapa. Dahil sa pagiging mas payapa mas malalasap mo ang tamis ng inyong pagiging magkasama. Darating ang panahon na hindi mo na makakayanan ang bugso ng iyong damdamin, at kailangan mo ng magdesisyon — magbubukas ka ba ng iyong kalooban kay Geo tungkol sa tunay na nararamdaman mo o hindi. When that time comes, if you’ve truly been paying attention to the wonderful “stituationship” you’ve so far enjoyed with Geo, you will never go wrong. Be open to him, and feel what he truly wants for himself as well. But also, be open to yourself. Honor your feelings, they are telling you something. However your story goes, proceeds, or ends, I wish you feel gratitude for what the universe has offered you. Such a beautiful friendship. Whether you open up or not, whether you get rejected or bring the relationship to a higher level, know that you’ve received much. Be well.

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At first I thought that I’ll just feature him here, and his advocacy, and that’s it. But I thought of something more fabulous! Since it is year-end anyway, I decided to honor him, his team, and his advocacy with an award I concocted myself: the MGG World Peace Award, which I would like to give to people, teams, projects, or initiatives that embody passion for promoting optimism, hope and positive attitude amidst all the negatives and craziness of this world.

To Cholo and everyone behind “Positivism” I salute you, and honor you with the very first MGG World Peace Award. I sincerely wish for more people to embrace the same advocacy. Migs the Manila Gay Guy embraces positivism. Mabuhay kayo! Mabuhay tayong lahat!

The Article by Cholo Hidalgo Laurel

I was in a café in Saigon during one of my shoots when this word first came to me. I recall the sunlight directly piercing through the trees and blinding my eyes as if to signify a coming epiphany. I felt a need but I didn’t know what I needed. I wondered if something was wrong with my life that I was not seeing. Defensively, I spoke to my self, “On the contrary, considering all that I had gone through in life, this is feeling like harvest time! I’m in a good relationship with a wonderful partner; 4 lovely children, respected by our peers. Ano pa ba ang hihilingin diba?” But the piercing sun was persistent. The emptiness was still there. It was making me sigh. Suddenly I just whispered to myself, “ God, I need to do something…no…not for myself. I need to do something… for you.

Before this starts to sound like college existentialist angst, I will have to admit that this soul searching comes from a natural tendency, My tendency to dig deep when I am sick and tired of something. Ok, confession, I was, at that point, getting very weary of advertising productions. Twelve years of tiptoeing around people’s egos, witnessing the most evil power plays known to man, often compromising standards and never really feeling creatively fulfilled was just eating my soul up. Ergo, This happy man was not a very contented man. This man wanted to start doing things that meant something. Gets?

After a few more sips (or was it cups) of coffee, the thought of an old acquaintance SHOLA LUNA crossed my mind. The thought lingered and I took it as a cue so I traced back. I had seen Shola a few weeks prior in a hospital near my home. I was having my annual check up and she was working as a health counselor of sorts and that was stunningly surprising for me because the Shola I once knew in Malate was the rebel of all rebels, not at all the angel that I had seen that day. But what was remarkable about meeting her again?… the fact that she’s HIV positive? That doesn’t stun me one bit…and then I thought of the word POSITIVE and found it amusing that a person with a viral strain would be popularly called POSITIVE. God must have some poetry behind that and I was about to find out.

POSITIVISM…hmm…I liked the sound of it.

Back in Manila a few weeks later, I intentionally paid Shola a visit in the same hospital to learn more of the world of POSITIVES and being the obsessive person that I can be, I even asked her to bring some of her positive friends over for dinner at my place just to get a deeper insight into an underworld of human beings who, as I discovered, are trying to rise above the heavy weight of stigma. They talked about their journeys from the darkness into light…from negative to positive…from near death to new life. They talked about how lonely it’s been but how hopeful they are for themselves and for the world, that world may awaken to realize that they deserve the name positive. I met gay as well as straight positive men and women and after many hours of hard laughter and tears, my heart found its mission. I focused into a vision… and I knew.

All this time the word POSITIVISM had already stuck to my subconscious mind. I didn’t know what it really meant but to me it meant POSITIVE ACTIVISM – activism for hiv positive people – to eradicate the apparent ignorance, kill the stigma and encourage love and understanding….kewl.

I penciled this in as part of the agenda for the next meetings with my creative team. Being like-hearted people, The HOTBOX team was quick to embrace the advocacy and so we set out for the most creatively fulfilling, heart-warming, soul-feeding journey – To make a web campaign that will help the Filipino deeply understand the HIV POSITIVE phenomenon.

God’s power is amazing, from one person (myself), ten more joined, then a small production house supported, a young director agreed to make a short, I sought help from colleagues and friends – THE Wig Tysman volunteered to shoot the cover, THE Tor Torre gave his make-up services, THE Mitch Amurao did the voices and THE Doctora Dytangko of the Research Institute for tropical medicine backed us up with the facts. Four months later, today, we’ve all grown up immensely and have learned so much about life, love and hope.

This Christmas, as we, the HOTBOX DESIGN STUDIO and our POSITIVISM friends launch this campaign; these are our arms wide open to all of you with all our love and hope. Help us spread the word in order to give hearts cheer, save lives, and spur hope in the hearts of many who need it.

Pay it forward; ask your loved ones to check it out. You will save lives and give hope to those who are deprived of hope.

Maligayang Pasko Pilipinas.

Please visit: http://www.positivism.ph

View more articles in MGG related to HIV.

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A gay friend gave me a gift today. (Thanks Madam!) It was the DVD featuring Paolo Rivero and Paolo Serrano, entitled “M2M 3: Versus.” It says on the back cover of the DVD jacket:

Versus is a tale of two male hunks undergoing the different stages of realization and of falling in and out of love. Their story reels off in their minds and is carried out in a rather sensual and provocative manner. What actually goes on…? And what are the complexities in the process of carrying out, staying in and moving on from this kind of relationship?

Masterfully crafted as the previous M2M features- this video shows the intricacies and dynamics of male to male relationship.

More photos of the two Paolos after the jump.

(Photos are screencaps of the “Gallery” portion of the DVD.)

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Let me start by saying how confused I am right now. Just call me Boy. I admit that I have learned to accept who I am years ago, so I thought. I’m a straight-acting bisexual, In fact, meron din akong circle of gay and bi friends and as far as I recall, minsan ginagawa akong escort ng mga gay friends ko, kunwari boyfriend nila ako, just for the sake of fun. I’ve had previous relationships with the same sex too, but as years passed by deep inside, I realize that that was not what I wanted or something like that. Then I guess that was the start of a struggle, an inner struggle, which I find most difficult to cope with. Suddenly may fear ako naramdaman, fear of discrimination, fear na mapahiya because sa mundo ginagalawan ko presently hindi declared my other side. Why I didn�t tell them in the first place? I really don�t know�

I thought at first ok lang yun na di nila malaman, sa family, sa work,etc. I told myself na hindi big deal yun sa akin pero later on I’ve realized parang meron spike pag naiiisip ko na what if mag-cross path yung mga gay friends and my straight friends. During one instance, my gay friend called me and told me na one of our common straight friend was inquiring if I was gay kase there were rumors na ganun.

That�s where the spike came� bakit may rumors? Then deep inside naapektuhan ako talaga ako. I thought bakit nung early 20�s ko ok lang na tangapin ko sa sarili ko na ganun ako , in fact, like what ive said before, nagkaroon din ako ng relationship sa kapwa lalake ko, and I have learned to love, to feel happiness and be hurt, just the norms pero bakit ngayon takot ako na malaman ng buong mundo kung sino ako. Migs I wrote this letter not as a viewer of your blog but as a friend seeking advice or someone I can talk to without inhibitions or who would just simply listen to my voice.

Thanks Migs and more power.
Boy

Hello Boy,

Sometime ago when we were younger, perhaps in your case, it was in your 20s, we felt POWERFUL. You were powerful enough to jump and accept yourself at that age. You felt powerful enough to have even thought that you can control the events of your life and the happenings in this world such that no one will know about your “deep, dark little secret.”

Now that you have matured a little bit more, you are realizing that there really are certain things that you cannot control — and I’m specifically referring to the one you cited, the rumors milling around about your sexuality. You are not LESS powerful now than before — you are just more honest and realistic, you are just more aware.

Knowing that other people are talking behind your back is indeed unsettling. I can totally understand it when you said “takot ako na malaman ng buong mundo kung sino ako.” Many of us have felt this way, including myself. I invite you to reflect more and deepen your awareness on why you feel this way, why you feel scared about people knowing the TRUTH about yourself. It seems to me that them knowing you are gay or bi is not really what scares you — perhaps it’s what you imagine they take as next steps that scare you: the rejection? the jeering? the discrimination? But let me underline what I just said. What you are scared of is what you IMAGINE they do after knowing who you really are. Take a step back and ponder on these.

In the end I hope you realize that you are still that powerful individual who took the jump and accepted yourself sometime in your 20s. I would even say that after going through this, now, you are even MORE powerful — you are more accepting of yourself and others, you are more aware of yourself and of the things around you, and as a result, you are more grounded.

And so if after all your reflection, what should you do if you are still bothered by the “spike”? One word: KEBS. You are powerful, you can “KEBS”. (If you do not know what KEBS means, just ask any friendly gay guy. KEBS is the shortened form of KEBER.”)

You are powerful, Boy.

Migs

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I’ve been reading your blog for almost three years and im so happy dahil maraming humihingi ng advice syo. Anyway just call me Macky, I just wanna share my story or should I say a problem. I’m a straight acting bi, walang nakakaalam kung ano ang tunay na feelings ko. Very discreet sabi nga nila. Nagwowork ako sa isang amusement company as operations manager for almost a decade, then minsan naaassign ako sa malayong lugar. Right now 6 months na ako sa Mindanao.

Nung pagdating ko dito, ipinakilala agad sa akin ng boss ko ang magiging assistant ko. Let’s just call him Dave. 28 years old , from Davao, married with 1 child. Siguro sa itsura nya masasabi ko na malakas ang dating nya sa mga girls at gay, kumbaga sa unang tingin mo pa lang may mararamdaman kang pitik sa katawan mo. Isang bahay lang ang inuuwian namin ni Dave at iisang kwarto din ang tinutulugan namin dahil company provided naman yun. By the way nasa abroad ang wife ni dave, ang baby naman nya ay nsa mga in-laws nya.

First few weeks pa lang kami magkasama sa work, nakapag-established agad kami ng good relationship, lagi nya akong niyayaya sa gimikan. Alam nya kasi na mahilig ako sa disco at inuman, minsan pinapasyal nya ako sa ibat ibang lugar.

Sa araw araw na magkasama kami sa work at bahay nakakadama ako ng kasiyahan na hindi ko pa naranasan sa buong buhay ko. Mararamdaman mo sa kanya ang mga pag-aalala pag nawawala ako sa paningin nya, tatawagan agad ako sa celphone at pupuntahan ako kung san man ako naroroon. Pag nararamdaman nya na naho-home sick ako tatanungin nya ako kung ano ang gusto ko para lang mapasaya ako. Pag pressured ako sa trabaho lagi sya naka-alalay sa lahat ng kelangan ko. Busog na busog ako sa sa time and effort na binibigay nya sa akin. Kung iisipin nga ng malisyosong tao, iisipin nila na may relasyon kami ni Dave.

Kala ko nun wala na katapusan ang lahat until one day niyaya nya akong gumimik, pumunta kami nun sa beerhouse. Since na discreet ako, nagkunwari ako na gusto ko talaga pumunta sa lugar na yun. Nagtable kami pareho ng babae, dahil sinabi nya na type daw nya yung isa. so sabi ko ok lang naman. Natapos ang gabi na yun na pareho kaming nalasing, hindi ko na alam kung paano ako nakauwi nun. Nagising na lang ako na magkayakap kami ni dave, bigla akong natauhan nun. nawala ang pagkalasing ko dahil naisip ko kaagad ang trabaho namin. Masama ang loob ko nun dahil parang may barrier na pumipigil sa akin para masabi ko or magawa ko ang gusto ko sa kanya, nararamdaman ko na alam nya kung ano ang nararamdaman ko para sa kanya. Nahulog ako sa kanya Migs, hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko.

One time around 11pm na ng gabi, lumabas siya ng bahay. Hindi nagpaalam sa akin kung san siya pupunta, I was so worried at hindi ako makatulog. Inabot ako ng umaga sa kahihintay sa kanya. Dumating cya ng office on time at tinanong ko sa kanya kung san sya galing kagabi, hindi ako nagpahalata na galit ako at masama ang loob ko sa kanya. Sinabi nya na pinuntahan nya yung Girl na naka-table nya nung gumimik kami nung nakaraan, kinuwento nya sa akin ng walang pag-aalinlangan kung ano ang ginawa nila at kung ilang ulit nila ginawa ang mga bagay na yun. Tatawa tawa lang ako habang nakikinig sa kanya, pero hindi nya alam na parang sinasaksak ako ng matinding selos. Ilang gabi na hindi na sya natutulog sa inuuwian namin, habang ilang gabi na din na hirap na hirap ang kalooban ko sa tuwing hindi sa uuwi at magigising ako na wala sya sa higaan nya. Minsan sa sobrang sama ng loob ko uminom ako mag-isa, nilunod ko ang sarili ko sa alak sa kagustuhan ko lang na makalimutan ang sama ng loob ko sa kanya. Pagdating ko sa bahay ng hatinggabi hinihintay nya pala ako sa labas. Tinanong nya ako kung san ako nanggaling sabi ko sabi ko may nagyaya lang sa akin habang nakangiti, hindi ko namamalayan na tumutulo na pala ang luha ko. Kahit anong pigil at iwas ang gawin ko patuloy ang pag-agos ng luha ko, tinanong nya ako kung may problema ako sumagot lang ako ng wala.

Siguro sa sobrang awa nya sa akin noon ay niyakap nya ako at sinabi nya sa akin kung ano ang problema ko ay handa naman siyang tumulong, kung ano man daw ang kelangan ko ay handa nya ibigay. Hanggang sa nakatulog ako sa kalasingan na nasa tabi ko sya habang nakayap sa akin. Hirap na hirap ako Migs, para siyang isang masarap na ulam na hindi pwede kainin or isang mansanas na hindi pwede pitasin.

Marami akong gustong sabihin sa kanya pero hindi ko magawa. Gusto ko sabihin na mahal ko siya pero pinipigil ako ng takot na baka hindi maging maganda ang resulta at baka masira ang relasyon namin sa trabaho. Mahal ko ang trabaho ko at hindi ko ito kayang isakripisyo pero mahal ko din si Dave at wala akong pwedeng gawin kundi umasa isang araw na maayos din ang lahat. Sa ngayon pinipilit ko na maging pormal at propesyonal sa harap ni Dave pero ang tanong ko sa sarili ko kung hanggang saan ba ang itatagal ko..

Thanks to you migs and more power!! God bless!!

Macky

Hello Macky,

Three things I want you to consider:

1. “Don’t shit where you eat.”
2. He’s your subordinate — don’t even dare think about it.
3. Open your eyes to the wide, wild world of bi/gay men. Andami, dami, dami mong choices.

Best of luck!

Migs

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I can remember when Pooh first came out to me. I was shaking, nervous, and anxious. My palms were sweaty and I couldn’t look him in the eye. I was surprised and didn’t know what to say. How could my straight best friend of 2 years suddenly tell me that he’s gay? Deep inside I knew that I felt that way because I had a crush on him all this time but knew that nothing could ever come of it because he was straight. It’s a strange feeling to finally come to terms and accept the fact that it could never happen, then suddenly, in an instant, a door opens. A door of opportunity seemed to have magically appeared out of nowhere. The question would seem to be – Do I rush right in before that door suddenly closes? Do I enter with caution? Or do I do nothing?

Continue Reading at Tiggah’s blog

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Interestingly, soon after that feature, I actually met Mikko in a bar in QC, not unknown as hangout for people like us. He struck me as ‘guapo’ in person, although I did feel my gaydar twitch, considering where I met him. Oh but I’m sure he was just having fun with his like-minded model-friends.

A year-and-a-half later, a mysterious email comes to my inbox, from an excited MGG reader (who curiously calls himself “Michael Untalasco”), asking for the following photos to be featured here in my blog. Nothing fantastic, but it wouldn’t hurt naman if I show you some of his more updated photos. So here. Enjoy, dear MGG habitues… once again, Mikko Untalasco.

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Just wanted to commend on the success of your blog, Im one of the regular readers and comfortable reading your entries and comments and personally waiting again for you to buzzed me again when you�re in my area (San Francisco). I never thought that one day I will write to ask for an advice.

I joined a Christian community to a thought that I can be change, not�.. though im trying. Just when I thought I will live a straight life when I met in the community Mac-Mac just a regular guy and not my usual type as I described him to my friends. But the guy is oozing with sex appeal. Then I remember a saying that you will never find your ideal person but instead you will be given the opposite of it and I think he is the one. Not my ideal but yet i like the person. Now the catch� he is straight again straight!

We first met and introduced in a sports bar January this year, and first topic that we are talking our girls from the other side of the pool table. Well I have a fair share of stories and gigs when it comes to girls. Then what bonded as most is a common hobby of ours, photography. One day I was surprised when I received an instant message on my messenger from him. Since then we will exchange IM�s all day we will chat anything as in anything under the sun. We will talk about our ex gfs, he even introduced me to one of his ex GF in LA. Then voice chats from the time I step in my office down to the time I will be off we are talking. We even have a pet name for each other (which instead of calling �pare�, �dude� or �bro�) we had created one for us.

There are 7 guys in our group (barkada) it is usually you have a favorite friend among the group. One day he teases me that I was always linked with the other boys (its our internal joke) then I joke back saying �so nag seselos ka?� then he bluntly said �no� then I fired him back �meron ka naman roy � (roy one of our barkada) he didn�t say anything.

As we go along, our friendship become closer and closer we will fight with simple things, he will let me know when he feels discomfort physically and emotionally, from saying goodbye and ingat when we are departing. Our friends are noticing it because when we have misunderstanding they will notice that we are not talking to each other and they would joke us that we are having LQ. One of the guys described it as (Hindi na lang kayo mag papansinan bigla pag katapos naman para kayong mag syota pag nag kabati) we will just laugh around.

The mixed signals, im not sure if im interpreting the signals wrong but I know I can differentiate regular buddies body language from those with a meaning. He always complain about me of having short attention with things then I joked by saying �hayaan mo pag nagging tyo ull have my undivided attention� then we just both laughed. Then few days after that he asked me �can I have your undivided attention� then I asked him �bakit tayo na ba?� then he said �no� I replied �binu-busted mo ako?� then he laughed and proceed to his question. We have a lots of incidence that are really mind boggling and it can go long with this email.

Migs, I had played this game with other straight guys and prove that they are bi and others just died down and stayed as friends. Im starting to like wait let me say LOVE mac-mac. Day by day its growing, the pressure is building up here in my heart, I want to tell him my feelings but im afraid that it will be turn down and worst we wont be friends and what will our friends will say when they found out and the community that are totally against same sex relationship.

Hope you or your readers (if you choose to post this) can share their point of view on these.

Thanks!
Supladong Pogi

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The grand finals of Wild, Wild, Wet, “The Extreme Edition” is going to be on Tuesday, November 11, 2008 at Bar Uno’s new location (Hollywood Square, West Avenue — just beside the new “Mister Kabab”). For more info, you may call them at 0921-4888884.

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Why was “Walang Kawala” such a hit? I think the promo photos did it. And the buzz about Marco Morales‘ two-time frontal exposure. The movie itself was palatable enough, in fact Emilio Garcia as the contravida had really funny scenes, such a welcome comic relief to the suspense/thriller that the film was suposed to be.

Overall, the movie is worth watching. What struck me the most was the openness with which the gay lover protagonists, Joaquin (Polo Ravales) and Waldo (Joseph Bitangcol), express their feelings to each other. “Mahal kita, mahal na mahal kita.” It was nothing lyrical, nothing poetic, really. But seeing two men express their love for each other onscreen, physically and verbally, somehow struck me, resonated with me. I was asking myself, maybe I have not seen such open verbal expression of gay love in any other movie I watched? Or it was such a familiar reality but it was my first time to see it shown in film? I’m not sure. What I’m sure of is that it was the most striking feature of the film for me — even more than Marco Morales’ dangling phallus (and it was alive! — sing with me now, “it’s alive, awake, alert, enthusiastic!” hehehe!) Lastly, I’d say Polo Ravales delivered quite a good performance. Too bad I couldn’t say the same for Joseph Bitangcol.

“Walang Kawala” opens on November 12 at the following theaters: Robinsons Galleria, Robinsons Ermita, Gateway Mall, Cinerama Isetann and New Cinema Theater (Cebu City).

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