Manila Gay Guy

[Here's a letter / contribution of Coffee Boy]

“Hey, just wanted to ask, are you gay, bisexual or something?” then I replied, “that… I’m not particularly sure of… I have a gf, but to be honest, I enjoy ‘it’ with men. No labels. Ikaw?” – then I got cold silence as a reply.

It was the 30th day of my birthday month, though still in the middle of the week, the following day was the end of Ramadan and thus was declared a holiday. I got nothing to do that payday afternoon and so I decided to just hang around. Walking along Timog / Tomas Morato area with no one and with literally nothing to do, I decided to go to one of my favorite spa places and pamper myself with an hour and a half long massage. (more…)

MGG reader Tom rants about how the word “bisexual” is being used and abused by some of our fellow beautiful people in the community. I agree with Tom in the sense that we really should call a spade a spade; I somewhat differ in the sense that we should sometimes give our fellow PLUs some slack — we ourselves know how difficult the process of coming to terms with one’s homosexuality can be, thus this temporary phase of “confusion” is forgivable.

What is unacceptable though is the idea of treating anyone as inferior because of any of these labels, just like what Tom said, which I paraphrase for accuracy: “Sad that some straight people look down upon us in disdain, sadder still that amongst ourselves, we do the same.”

And this goes as much for the out-and-about gay guys bashing the closetted and so-called straight-acting gay guys, as for the butch types bashing “effems.” Guys, let’s all grow up. And let’s help each other grow up as well. Bashing is bashing, and it is simply unacceptable behavior. Let’s open our hearts a bit, look at our brothers in the community peering through the visible outer shell of how they dress up (nakataas ang kuwelyo, ultra-fitting baby tees, naka-skinny jeans, etc.), or how they talk (modulated “tol!”, “pre!”, “bro!”, or the fabulousity of “chuva!” “chenes”, “chenelyn everlu”). Gay, boy, bakla, tomboy — we’re all human beings that deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. With this in mind, we will know how to conduct ourselves as respectable and dignified persons, and we will know too how to treat others appropriately, always observing the ethic of reciprocity, more popularly known as the Golden Rule — “treat others as you would like to be treated.”

Hi Migs,

I’ve been reading your blog for quite some time, and at first i have to admit, it was because of the half naked men. But after time, I’ve seen past that and now it’s the written content that matters (plus the half naked men). Anyway, I’ve decided to email you just so I can get a few things off my chest. Please forgive the foul language… as I said I am venting.

Gay… What Does It Mean?
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“I’m bisexual,” says a new friend while we were having dinner among other new friends. It got me to thinking how the concept and use of the term “bisexual” has, to say it bluntly, been bastardized as of late. (more…)

“Top, Bottom, Versa?” — every gay guy who has ever hooked up with a fellow gay guy knows this line by heart. For the uninitiated, top means the penetrator (in an@l sex), bottom means the penetrated, and versa means either (thus versatile), depending on the person’s partner or mood. (more…)

Once upon a time, when I was still calling myself bi, bi-curious, straight-tripper, confused, curious, and many more labels that just meant I was a man interested in other men, I spent literally loads of money to explore. I call it the cost of curiosity — curiosity in the gay context.

There was this one time when I was in Shanghai, on one of those business trips where my company sent me to manage some regional projects. I was billeted in Shangri-La Hotel in the Pudong-side of the bustling city, and on one weekend when I was not doing anything, I decided to chat via Yahoo. I “met” this one guy (more…)