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Hi Migs,

I was deeply attracted and had feelings for a close friend of mine who is straight but is bisexual at times. I am bisexual. me and him have been intimate with each other numerous of times but I started falling for him hard so I stopped hanging with him and talking to him for awhile and wasn’t having sex with him. well I decided to move back in at his house a couple months ago and we started back messin around here and there and now I’ve kinda caught feelings for him again. I try to shake those feelings as much as I can and try to push them to the side but it makes me want him even more. he is cool messin around from time to time but said he would never date a guy and I would love to be in a relationship with him. I don’t know what to do. I need some serious advice.

– M.N.

 

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Hi Migs!

I know your blog generally tackles mostly LBGTQ issues and concerns. I am a heterosexual woman. Nonetheless, I felt that I could share this concern with you.

I thought of writing you because I fell in love with this male massage therapist whom I came across through your blog. Long story short, I saw your blogs about him and I got infatuated with him, so much so that I decided to get a massage from him.

The decision to get a massage from him was out-of-character to say the least because I am not entirely comfortable with the idea of having a masseur touch me, much less caress me, especially given that the massage the Spa offers is more than the usual massage I get from my regular spas.

When I finally got the massage, it was more than the usual routine. Without me asking for it, he gave me the “extra service” I only ever heard about from my gay friends. He was ever the gentleman and ensured my comfort all throughout.

After the massage, he started texting me. Given my infatuation, I entertained him. He eventually asked me out on a date. My friends, especially my gay friends, cautioned me against getting into something serious with him considering our circumstances. They warned me that there is always the danger of being made a sugar mommy and of the therapist taking advantage of me for material reasons. I told them that I am a big girl and I can handle it. I was wrong.

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Yesterday at the Pride March, the usual “fundis” (Christian Fundamentalists) were there to make sure we, the marchers, knew we’re going straight to hell if we, well, don’t straighten up. Just when our part of the march was approaching the Nakpil-Orosa corner where the march was to end, I saw one march participant and one of the fundis, at one corner, engaged in an almost brawl: they were shouting at each other tonsil-to-tonsil!

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After almost 8 years of being together, having enjoyed that simple life with the one he loves, Paul felt different. People in relationships actually change. He says, “I think I needed to grow, I have to assert who I am, maybe I lost myself in the relationship.” This is how we start this fourth part of this podcast series on the story of Sam and Paul. If Part 3 is the OMG episode of the series because the Fabcasters themselves were continually shocked with details of the revelations, here in this part, they calm down a bit–yet the shocking revelations didn’t stop coming. We’ve been desensitized! You will hear about sexual infidelities, “puwede naman ang dalawang ka-relasyon, di ba?,” tatluhan, apatan, limahan, and more. Yet underneath it all, listen for what really is happening between the two as they whirl around all the many eventualities and issues in the relationship.

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It was a beautiful Monday morning. The previous evening she called me. She’s in town only for 3 days, and I was here for just the weekend plus 2 days — what a serendipitous thing for 2 “OFWs” to be in Manila at the same time. So we decided to do breakfast together that beautiful Monday morning.

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We’ve been Facebook friends for some time now. She added me, and I was just too happy to be her online friend. It was awkward at first, but soon enough we were exchanging messages like we’re good ol’ friends. Finally that Monday morning, we would meet, in person, for the very first time.
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I arrived at the restaurant early, so I decided to read the papers while waiting. I barely finished scanning the front page when a beautiful woman came in. It was her. I immediately stood up, walked to her, and we introduced ourselves to each other with a big warm hug. It felt good.
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The ensuing conversation was non-stop. The breakfast was just an excuse, we met really to connect with each other. And connect we did. She was chatty, I was too, and except for that one time she whipped out her SLR to capture the moment, we were on to gabfest galore, talking about the littlest things. Until one subject came up. Her brother. Her brother is our connection. He is SAGG. The guy I dated some 3 years ago. The guy who loved me like I was the only man in the world. The guy who treated me like I was his universe. Sadly, I never reciprocated.
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She was in tears. “Honestly, there was a time I hated you for what you did to him. But I also love you for what you did. You’re the only guy who made him that happy, and the only one who made him that sad. He loves you until now. Don’t tell him I told you.” She continued, now with a broken voice, “but I really just want my brother to be happy.” I knew what she meant, even if her words did not say it. I held her hand. By this time, her beautiful face was drenched with tears. And yet I knew the best thing to do is to just be with her. Not to rush and fix. To sit with her as she expressed her pain. Not to run and make the pain fade away.
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She is just 22. I thought to myself, when she experiences more of life and more of love, she will understand why not reciprocating can be the most loving thing to do.

“May nagtatagal bang gay relationships?”

This special-edition fabcast answers this question. Meron. We present to you a handsome gay couple, the goodlooking Sam and cute-but-hot Paul, who tell us how their relationship (now on its 8th year) started and flourished.

Listen and learn!

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If I burn–no, when I burn— I want to burn with you. We’ll fuel each other’s flare, spark a blaze that will incinerate our grimy pasts, and beam a burning light to each our throbbing hearts, where no desire is fiercer than generously giving, and no passion is known except that of you and me loving, from fire and coal, to ember and ash.

Galing sa pugon ng Maynila kung saan talaga namang bubula ang kili-kili mo sa init ng panahon, eh masayang lumarga ang inyong lingkod pabalik ng Amerika. (Oo, sa mga huli na sa balita, si Migs eh dito na sa isteyts nakatira.) Paglapag na paglapag ko sa paliparan ng San Francisco, ramdam na ramdam ko ang ginhawa ng maaliwalas at malamig na hangin. Sarap, shet. Problema lang, kumukulo ang tiyan ko. May nakain akong di maganda; yun yata yung Siomai-Mami na tinira ko sa NAIA. Luma na yata at pinatambling ang sikmura ko.

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Dear Migs,

I finally got the guts to write you a letter. It has been almost two years since the first time I read on your blog. Since then, I took inspiration, courage and the will to embrace the life I choose and share my story. Call me Roger, I’m 23 and already a college professor. I must admit that gay university instructors are not new, except for me. I’m closeted. I started to teach just last June 2009. Each time, I hold classes I make it a point that I could deliver the subject in the most ‘straight’ way possible. Every single day is a struggle especially if I get interested and attracted to students. This is my greatest fear what if I get hooked on a student? I can’t risk my job, neither my student’s future.

Until I met Joshua. He’s 17 and a freshman.

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Hi Migs,

I never thought that the day would come that I would be the one writing to you. I enjoy reading your posts and appreciate your views on different dilemmas sent to you by your viewers. I need some sort of advice regarding my case. Just call me John, 22 years old, hurting and sad. My story just happened recently so everything is fresh from my memory. One day (to be exact February 13,2010), this guy (let’s just call him Renz, 29 years old) called me up. I knew where he got my number but I won’t mention it here anymore. He was a stranger. We talked for a very short time only because I was about to go somewhere. After our conversation, we exchanged a few text messages. When I got home, he called again. We talked for a very long time. I felt at ease talking to him. We exchanged infos about ourselves, our likes and dislikes, our funny stories etc. It felt really good just talking to him.

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