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Here’s a series of letters I received from someone who calls himself “ILoveAlec” a Pinoy gay guy in Malaysia.

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Hi Migs,

I’m a big fan of your site. I always read whatever you put there. I’m the guy that hates drama hehehehe. I’ve been wanting to write you for the longest time but can’t find good story to share until yesterday Nov 8, 2008.

I’m currently in Malaysia for a short visit. Yesterday I went to see the Petronas out of curiosity because I’ve been hearing a lot of good words from people who see it and also from the movies.

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Dear Migs,

Let me start by saying how confused I am right now. Just call me Boy. I admit that I have learned to accept who I am years ago, so I thought. I’m a straight-acting bisexual, In fact, meron din akong circle of gay and bi friends and as far as I recall, minsan ginagawa akong escort ng mga gay friends ko, kunwari boyfriend nila ako, just for the sake of fun. I’ve had previous relationships with the same sex too, but as years passed by deep inside, I realize that that was not what I wanted or something like that. Then I guess that was the start of a struggle, an inner struggle, which I find most difficult to cope with. Suddenly may fear ako naramdaman, fear of discrimination, fear na mapahiya because sa mundo ginagalawan ko presently hindi declared my other side. Why I didn’t tell them in the first place? I really don’t know…

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Hi Migs,

I’ve been reading your blog for almost three years and im so happy dahil maraming humihingi ng advice syo. Anyway just call me Macky, I just wanna share my story or should I say a problem. I’m a straight acting bi, walang nakakaalam kung ano ang tunay na feelings ko. Very discreet sabi nga nila. Nagwowork ako sa isang amusement company as operations manager for almost a decade, then minsan naaassign ako sa malayong lugar. Right now 6 months na ako sa Mindanao.

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If there’s one thing this past week that made me stop and think, ponder and reflect, it was Charlie’s letter.

I’m Charlie, turning 27 in a couple of months. I’d like to share my story with your readers… I found out about my condition (…) last year. I’m HIV positive.

His was the third I received this August, talking about being HIV-positive. His letter simply rendered me without anything to say, at least temporarily. I didn’t know how to react. It was overwhelming. I thought, if I fire off sweet, encouraging words, will that really help? Will that really make Charlie feel better about his condition? If I start playing the role of a cold jaundiced preacher, lecturing on lessons learned from Charlie’s experience and perhaps advocate “safe sex” till the cows come home, will it really make a difference? I don’t know.

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Thank you, thank you, thank you to all who have sent in their messages to my mobile (+63-915-869-2229). I apologize for not being able to reply via text — I hope you understand. Rest assured I’m reading all your text messages. In fact I’m publishing some of those I received so far. Again thank you, nakatataba ng puso ang mga messages ninyo. Keep `em coming! Mwah! World Peace!

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Lea Salonga’s introductory song in the phenomenal Miss Saigon reverberated in my mind as I read the first line of Stan’s letter below. “I’m 17, and I’m new here today…” Kuyang-kuya ang feeling ko sa isang ito, hahaha! As older gay brothers, we might get tempted to abbreviate our suggestion to, “wala yan, bata ka pa kasi, move on.” But really, would that help him? Just like in situations where we help or coach someone, we always seek to understand the other party first. Seek first to understand and hold off the naturally autobiographical response. My challenge to you guys is to express your brotherly love to our dear 17-year-old co-MGG habitue, by reading his letter below and leaving a comment here that would hopefully help him help himself…

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kuya migs,

i’m only 17 and i’m a follower of your blog for quite sometime. i’ve been somehow acquainted with the LGBT lifestyle with the past 4 years of my life. i recently put up a blogsite and i know for a moment you have already checked it out. i don’t even know where and how to begin. as of now, i cannot say i’m gay coz i still find women attractive. i even make love to them. i’ve had 6 girlfriends before but now, i classify my self as a discreet bisexual. but without even understanding the whole meaning of it. since elem, i never doubted with what my sexuality is. i was soft spoken and some how clumsy compared to other guys my age during those times but that doesn’t bother me at all. though sometimes, my guy friends would shun me the word “silahis” which my innocence didn’t care. all i know is that nobody have the rights of questioning how i am. my looks, the way i act and all. it was all nothing big deal for me. this scene became consistent not until my 4th year in highschool came.

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Do you like straight men? Have you at any point in your life been attracted and actually “chased” a straight man? Here’s an exciting story from one of our regular MGG readers. Read on, get titillated, and join in the comments festival! (Kembot!)

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Hi Migs,

Let me start off by saying that I am an avid reader of your blog. Love the photos of men, the articles, the letters and most especially the comments that people give! Ang saya saya ng comments ng mga utaw at very lively ito (kung paminsan, eh ang mga commenters ang mismo nag-ookrayan). Gusto ko sanang i-share sa iyo ang aking istorya at sigurado ako na maraming bading ang makaka-relate. I have always been an active guy. Mahilig ako sa outdoors, sports activities, adventures at all-around good-natured trippings but I have a guilty pleasure. I go after straight men. Ika nga ng mga ka-tropa ko eto ang “market” ko. Mind you, I don’t go exclusively after straight men. I’ve had very long-term and rewarding relationships with other gay men, pero getting straight men is the spice in my life.

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Late bloomer – that’s the term we usually use to describe those people who explored their homosexuality a little later than usual. This is the case of JC, our letter sender for today. JC is set to get married to his girlfriend of 4 years early next year, when he recently met the to-be-wife’s gorgeous hunky cousin Daryl. In short, Daryl turned JC’s world upside down, and the to-be-husband is naturally confused. The question: should he risk his wedding plans to give himself a chance to explore his dormant homosexual tendencies? Or should he shut the feelings up, and go straight on with his heterosexual plans?

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Hi Migs,

I chance upon your site while surfing today. Wonderful site for gay people. I feel so comfortable with your site. I was able to read the letter of fatboyslim and some of the advices that were given to him by your readers (some are rude) that I decided to share to you my problem and hopefully I will be able to get some advice from you and your readers.

I am John, friends call me JC, 29 years old and currently connected with a call center here in Ortigas. I have a girlfriend for 4 years now, and we’re planning to get married early next year. I love her for God knows how long, (we’ve been together since high school) and I know she will be the one I want to spend the rest of my life with.

The problem started last December.

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MIRC, one boring weekend.

ASL?

20 m qc.

I hesitated for a while. Bagets. Too young. But what the heck.

You okay with an older guy?

Tito? Kuya? Hehehe. Pic pls.

And the customary photo swap transpired.

Hmmm, I told myself. Cute guy. Tall. Muscular but not bulky. Most of all, a moreno pretty face. Alluring smile. May potential.

I was aggressive. Wanna meet?

He showered me with questions. When? Where? What do you want to do? Then it came down to, QC ako eh. Malayo.

I brushed his issue aside, may kotse ako. I can pick you up in QC.

In a few minutes, I was ready to go. Susunduin ko nga ang bata. Hatid Sundo. Sundo’t Hatid, I wished, hahaha!

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Nutella, our featured reader-lettersender, asks Migs if it is okay to have a boypren-boyprenan, a trophy boyfriend, someone to help one get by emotionally, mentally, and physically while waiting for Mr. Right. The naturally conservative guy in me shouts “noooo!” as the idea violates the sanctity of a relationship based on true love, and therefore (in my mind), exclusivity brought about not by unbridled selfishness but by the soul’s innate need for a unique and singular focus from the other party. But because I have a healthy skepticism of my own opinion, I’d let you dear MGG readers share your own, perhaps contrary, opinion.

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Hi Migs,

Greetings of love and world peace! Let me start by saying that I’m a big fan of your blog. Through it, I have gained more knowledge and a better understanding of what it’s like to be a gay man. I can safely say that I’m a well-experienced gay man myself. By well-experienced, I mean that I have, at least once in my life, tried most of the things that gay men can only imagine (or dream of) doing.

Inspite of and despite my experiences, I still consider myself a lonely man. I have been through a lot and after my promiscuity stage and 3 failed relationships, I now belong to the Tribe of the Jaded. And this is where I come to you to seek advice and ideas from you and your readers about my current state of mind.

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