Manila Gay Guy
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Hi Migs. Call me Ethan. This is the first time I’m writing your site, but have been an avid reader of yours since 2006. It has been a source of comfort and relief for me, knowing that I’m not alone in my struggles in this world. Anyway, the reason I’m writing is because I too have a problem. I think I’m in love, for the first time in my life. Let me explain.

It started almost two weeks ago. I ‘met’ him, of all places, in a porn site. He saw my profile, messaged me, asked me for my MSN, and the rest, as they say, is history. At first, we chatted irregularly, once every few days or so. On 17 August, however, everything took a turn for the better. We started messaging each other more; sometimes we’d last anywhere from 3 to 4 hours, just sitting and sending each other messages. I became enamored with him; everything about him was perfect! We had the same interests: history, politics, books, and all this for a guy who was 18 (I’m 19). We even shared some interesting commonalities; he and I are both altar boys, we both come from big families, and we are both firmly planted in the closet. In no time at all, I think we became too sweet to each other — and we’ve never even met!

The trouble started a few days ago.

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Hi migs, i must admit that i am thrilled how you and some of your readers have had so much encounters… at least with guys (if they are all authentic). well, here’s me also sharing some of my not-so-great adventures.

ABOUT ME

well, i’m 21, neat-looking, tall, white, mid way between medium built and thin, working at a so-so coffee shop doing brand communications stuff. grew up at a province but went back to manila for college. i was raised like a normal boy should be, only that i have lived only with my sister (at least for more than 6 years when i was in my puberty stage). i guess this was the reason why i act almost effeminate, but not quite. during my highschool and college days, i was the typical boy next door: kind, open, friendly, and smart (tends to be a geek at times). also, i was very active at extra-curriculars: top CAT officer, captain of the dance group, best actor for teatro, HS choir member, chorale president (in college), and a frequent contestant in bees and oratoricals. often admired by ladies, i am a hopeless romantic who would do so much just so the girl of his dreams would come to life. i don’t mind giving bouquets of roses, or gigantic bear gifts to girls, in fact i like it when others stare at me with these (dagdag pogi points din yun!). so that’s the typical me – a “good boy” often in and out of relationships with the campus cutties… that’s what i let them see.

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Hi Migs,

I don’t know what made me send this letter to you. I can say that I’m a fan of your site- a regular visitor. I have read a lot of letters from your readers, and I must say I can pretty much relate to some of them.

My dilemma starts with me, being gay, in a “Christian” family. It’s hard; I grew-up attending Sunday school, I even became a Sunday-school teacher myself, and sometime in my life thought of becoming a pastor, but I know something is different with me.

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Do you like straight men? Have you at any point in your life been attracted and actually “chased” a straight man? Here’s an exciting story from one of our regular MGG readers. Read on, get titillated, and join in the comments festival! (Kembot!)

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Hi Migs,

Let me start off by saying that I am an avid reader of your blog. Love the photos of men, the articles, the letters and most especially the comments that people give! Ang saya saya ng comments ng mga utaw at very lively ito (kung paminsan, eh ang mga commenters ang mismo nag-ookrayan). Gusto ko sanang i-share sa iyo ang aking istorya at sigurado ako na maraming bading ang makaka-relate. I have always been an active guy. Mahilig ako sa outdoors, sports activities, adventures at all-around good-natured trippings but I have a guilty pleasure. I go after straight men. Ika nga ng mga ka-tropa ko eto ang “market” ko. Mind you, I don’t go exclusively after straight men. I’ve had very long-term and rewarding relationships with other gay men, pero getting straight men is the spice in my life.

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Nutella, our featured reader-lettersender, asks Migs if it is okay to have a boypren-boyprenan, a trophy boyfriend, someone to help one get by emotionally, mentally, and physically while waiting for Mr. Right. The naturally conservative guy in me shouts “noooo!” as the idea violates the sanctity of a relationship based on true love, and therefore (in my mind), exclusivity brought about not by unbridled selfishness but by the soul’s innate need for a unique and singular focus from the other party. But because I have a healthy skepticism of my own opinion, I’d let you dear MGG readers share your own, perhaps contrary, opinion.

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Hi Migs,

Greetings of love and world peace! Let me start by saying that I’m a big fan of your blog. Through it, I have gained more knowledge and a better understanding of what it’s like to be a gay man. I can safely say that I’m a well-experienced gay man myself. By well-experienced, I mean that I have, at least once in my life, tried most of the things that gay men can only imagine (or dream of) doing.

Inspite of and despite my experiences, I still consider myself a lonely man. I have been through a lot and after my promiscuity stage and 3 failed relationships, I now belong to the Tribe of the Jaded. And this is where I come to you to seek advice and ideas from you and your readers about my current state of mind.

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Ria, the woman letter sender of that previous post “My husband has a rich gay lover” responds after the overwhelming deluge of advice from our dear MGG readers. Let us all wish Ria the best, may she be blessed with strength to get through her current situation. (And for all of us who are privileged with knowing Ria’s story, gay men or straight men and women readers of MGG, may this be a reminder that the choices we make, the actions we take, impact other people and the world around us. Keep world peace in our hearts!)

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Hello Migs,

I never expected that my letter will be published that fast. Thank you for your kind words and from your readers. Please, please, extend my heartfelt gratitude for their thoughts and for the advice that they gave. I just read their comments and I must say that I am overwhelmed.

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candle to perfidy A week ago, sometime around midnight, I was driving along Roxas Boulevard with my friends, and while I forget the topic of our animated, energetic conversation that time, I remember I was searching for this word in my mind. Nasa dulo ng dila ko. It escaped me at that moment, and I thought it was the most appropriate word to use for whatever my friends and I were talking about. Now I remember it: Perfidy.

Perfidy [pur-fi-dee]: (noun) deliberate breach of faith or trust; faithlessness; treachery.

Today it suddenly struck me again, and this time, I remembered the word. Not only do I remember the word but I remember the concept. I lived it several years ago. That time I had a partner and he was my first. It started out pretty well, until I did some naughty things.

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