Manila Gay Guy
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Hi Migs!

I know your blog generally tackles mostly LBGTQ issues and concerns. I am a heterosexual woman. Nonetheless, I felt that I could share this concern with you.

I thought of writing you because I fell in love with this male massage therapist whom I came across through your blog. Long story short, I saw your blogs about him and I got infatuated with him, so much so that I decided to get a massage from him.

The decision to get a massage from him was out-of-character to say the least because I am not entirely comfortable with the idea of having a masseur touch me, much less caress me, especially given that the massage the Spa offers is more than the usual massage I get from my regular spas.

When I finally got the massage, it was more than the usual routine. Without me asking for it, he gave me the “extra service” I only ever heard about from my gay friends. He was ever the gentleman and ensured my comfort all throughout.

After the massage, he started texting me. Given my infatuation, I entertained him. He eventually asked me out on a date. My friends, especially my gay friends, cautioned me against getting into something serious with him considering our circumstances. They warned me that there is always the danger of being made a sugar mommy and of the therapist taking advantage of me for material reasons. I told them that I am a big girl and I can handle it. I was wrong.

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Warning: get a glass of water before proceeding! Straight Pinoy boys up ahead…

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Hello po! Mr. Migs! Napag-isipan kong isulat ang aking kwento dahil gusto ko malaman ang reaksyon ninyo at ng mga readers tungkol sa aking naranasan. Papa-ikiliin ko na ang kwento ko at direct to the point.

Ako si Drew, 18. Ako ay isang Marine Student sa isang prominenteng Maritime School dito sa Pilipinas. Syempre, in-house ang aming training. Sabay-sabay kaming gumigising, nag-eexercise, kumakain, nag-aaral. Pero maswerte pa din kami kasi may privacy kami. Kasi by rooms ang mga kadete. Hindi kagaya sa iba na barracks type kung tawagin o puro kama-kama sa isang floor.

Siya ay si Joseph, 19. Siya ang roommate ko. Nagkakilala kami nung orientation pa lang. Naging close na agad kami kaya kami na ang nagdecide na maging roommates. Nagstart ang klase June 2009.

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Hey Migs,

Writing you this letter was actually a decision I had to make. Not that it’s hard to do but maybe I just thought of asking for a little help from you.

My name is Robert and I have been an avid reader of your blog for a long time now. I found out about your blog while I was scanning a certain magazine. And from then on, I got interested in reading your articles. The reason why I’m writing you this letter it’s because I’m having this “difficulty”, a situation where I don’t know what to do. I have never talked to anybody about this yet and hopefully I could get some piece of opinion from you.

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We conclude the fabcast on gray areas in this part. We start off wrapping up the gray area between a gay guy and a straight guy. “May mga taong straight talaga!” Naman! Also, you will hear Jojo & Jay’s situation who, during the podcast recording, were sweeter than sugar to each other. They are contemplating a soon-to-be long distance relationship despite the fact that they just met each other 7 days before. This and more, in the concluding part of “Gray Areas In the Gay Life.”

Listen: (32 min 28 sec)

Download this fabcast (right click and save – 31MB)

Music credits: “Forbidden Love” by Madonna; “Use Somebody” by Bat For Lashes; “Bad Romance” by Lady Gaga; and “Trouble Is A Friend” by Lenka. Podcast Production by McVie.

Hi Migs,

First of all, please allow me to greet you a pleasant good day.

Just call me Dee, straight acting at kahit papano may itsura rin, pero deep inside of me ay bading na bading ako, im 28 yrs and working as an OFW. Magdadalawang taon na ako dito sa kumpanyang aking pinapasukan pero hanggang ngayon virgin pa ako sa pakikipag talik sa kapwa ko pilipino sa takot kong matsismis o masira ang aking reputasyon, pero sa ibang lahi ay marami-rami na akong nakatalik at diko na mabilang kung ilan silang lahat.

May crush akong pinoy, sya si Jigs isa sya sa maraming pinoy engineers namin dito sa company, matangkad, moreno at gwapo. Tahimik lang sya at madalas sa pinaka dulo ng service bus sya nakaupo kapag uwian na namin. Unang kita ko palang sa kanya dito sa office namin ay kinabog na agad ang aking puso at mula nga nuon ay naging pantasya ko na sya gabi-gabi. Kahit may pagtingin ako sa kanya ay diko ipinahalata sa kanya but deep inside of me ay kinikilig ako kapag nakangiti sya sa akin kapag nagkaka salubong kami sa hallway or sa labas.

Hanggang sa lumalim na ang aking nararamdaman at naging LOVE na yata ito, kaya ng diko na mapigil pa ang aking nararamdaman ay nag e-mail ako sa kanya using other e-mail address, sabi ko nung una na HI CAN YOU BE MY FRIEND, nag reply naman sya ng OK LANG. Nung una ayaw kong sabihin ang tunay kong identity at panay lang ang send ko ng messages reminding him to be safe always etc….. at yun nga lang nakaka-irita kasi sa sobrang haba ng mga messages ko ay iisang word lang ang reply nya na palaging THNX lang.

Hanggang isang araw nagulat nalang ako ng sabihin nyang “parang kilala na kita pero di ako sure kung ikaw nga yun pero malakas ang kutob kong ikaw yun pero oks lang sa akin at thnx Dee” Natopak ako ng husto pero pilit parin akong nag deny na ako yun pero sabi nya “Kung di ikaw yun sana dimo ako ginugudtime lang” at mula nga nuon dina sya nag rereply sa messages ko at namis ko ang replies nyang THANX lang. Dahil mahal ko sya ay umamin na ako at hiniling ko sa kanya na sana ay mananatiling lihim ang aking pagkatao sa lahat at sabi nya PROMISE YOU HAVE MY WORD.

Sa sobrang hiya ko, di ako makatingin ng diretso sa kanya at natigil narin ang pagpapadala ko ng messages sa kanya, luka-luka lang talaga siguro ako kasi minsan nakasalubong ko sya at kinausap nya ako at sobrang smile sya sa akin, syempre kinilig na naman ako kaya masaya na ulit ako. Hnaggang ngayon nag ngingitian naman kami kapag nagkaka salubong kami pero nararamdaman kong medyo nahihiya sya sa akin at ako man ay di rin makatagal na makipag titigan sa kanya kasi parang nalulusaw ako sa mga titig nya. Alam ko rin na alam na nya na di lang friendship ang gusto kong mangyari kaya medyo nahihiya na sya siguro sa akin. Kung dipa dahil sa ALIMASAG ay baka dipa kami magkakaroon ng chance na magpalitan ng mga messages na medyo mahaba-haba ang replies nya.

Migs ang problema ko ngayon ay kung paano ko sasabihin sa kanya na feel ko syang maka bed of roses. Madalas naman akong yayain ng inuman ng kanyang mga kasamahan sa accomodation nila pero ang worries ko lang ay mahina at madali akong malasing at baka imbes na matikman ko sya ay baka tulugan ko lang sila sa sobrang kalasingan ko at takot din akong malasing kasi madali akong mauto-uto.

Migs sana matulungan mo ako kasi parang masisiraan na ako ng bait kung pano ko sya matitikman kasi ang tagal ko ng naghihintay. Ano ba ang magandang gawin para maramdaman nya na feel na feel ko syang maka bed of roses. Dapat ko bang sabihin sa kanya na matagal ko na syang crush, pero natatakot naman akong baka i-reject nya ako.

Lubos na gumagalang Dee

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Dear Dee,

Sa unang pagkabasa ko ng liham mo, aaminin kong napakunot-noo ako. Sabi ko, yun lang ba talaga ang gusto niya? Na ma-“bed of roses” niya si Jigs? Mabilis ko rin namang nasagot ang sarili ko (oo, may pagka-schizophrenic ako, lalo na ngayong nasa ibang bansa ako at malimit na walang makausap). Ikaw na rin ang nagsabi, ukol sa nararamdaman mo kay Jigs: “…hanggang sa lumalim na ang aking nararamdaman at naging LOVE na yata ito.”

Alam mo Jigs, kung talagang “bed of roses” lang ang habol mo sa kanya, napakadali. Pero nararamdaman ko na hindi lang iyon ang gusto mo. Para bang gusto mo rin yatang subukang buksan ang puso ni Jigs, at magbaka-sakaling higit pa sa pakikipagkaibigan ang maaari ninyong maging turingan. Tama ba ang naiisip ko?

Kung mahal mo nga siyang talaga, at nagnanais ka na mahalin din ni Jigs, ihanda mo ang sarili mo. Ihanda mong tahakin ang landas na kay-rami nang sumubok. May mga nabigo, ngunit mayroon din namang nagtagumpay. Sa aking pagkakaalam, matarik ang landasing ito, kaya nga ang payo ko sa iyo ay ihanda mo ang sarili mo. “Paano?,” maaring susunod na tanong mo. Kadalasan, sa karamihan ng umusbong na pag-ibig, nagdadaan ito sa pakikipagkaibigan. Ika nga, friendship is the seed of long-lasting love. Bakit di mo subuking maging isang tunay na kaibigan ni Jigs? Alam kong matagal mo nang inaasam na ikama ang lalaking iyan, pero kung talagang pagmamahal ang hanap mo, kung pangmatagalan ang gusto mo, baka kailangan mong maging mas pasensiyoso. Siyempre, hindi kasiguraduhan na magtatagumpay ka, dahil malay ba naman natin kung talagang diretso pa sa ruler yang si Jigs. I mean, baka naman kahit anong tambling mo eh di talaga magmamahal yan ng isang sirena. We don’t know, yet you can try. And when you succeed, aba, ultimong kampana sa North Pole eh kakalembang sa tuwa.

Kung talaga namang sex lang ang habol mo sa kanya, ito naman ang maipapayo ko. Gawin mo ang lahat para siya mismo ang humingi nito. Na siya mismo ang kumalabit sa iyo at magsabi, “Dee, ok lang ba sa iyo…?” Paano, ika mo? Madali lang yan. Una, kilalanin mo siya — ano ba ang history niya sa sex? Pumatol na ba siya sa bading dati? (kung oo, aba, eh di napakadali naman na pala ng gusto mo.) Relaxed lang ba siya sa ganitong usapan, o medyo homophobic siya? Kapag alam mo na kung nasaan siya sa spectrum, mas makakapag-adjust ka. Sa tingin mo ba, mas kumportable siya kung medyo pa-girl ka? O baka mas may chance kung itutuloy mo ang pagiging pamintang durog? Hija, gamitin ang utak. For more ideas, hahayaan ko na ang ibang MGG readers na mag-suggest. O di kaya naman ay basahin ang post na ito at ito pa. Basta’s huwag kakalimutan ang bilin ko, uulitin ko ha, gawin mong siya mismo ang humiling ng sex. Kapag nagawa mo yan, kokoronahan kita ng bonggang-bongga. At pakakalembangin din natin yang kampana sa North Pole — to the tune of “Nobadi Ba-chooo!”

O, siya, Dee, magpaganda ka na. Salamat sa pagsulat.

Kumakandirit ever, ang Ate mong pagka-minsa’y kunsintidora…

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Mike and Mark

Mike and Mark are twins. Both are good looking, and share almost all God-given gifts and talents (okay, okay, including a decent-sized, e.g. 7-in, man-meat). Both behave very straight (meaning, butch), both very manly. Assume all things between them are equal, except for one thing: Mike is 100% straight (meaning, he only falls in love with real women), and Mark is 100% gay (meaning, he only falls in love with men, straight or otherwise).

Given the chance to have sex with one, and ONLY ONE of them, who would you choose? Mike (straight) or Mark (gay)?

Comment in your answers! (For your vote to be counted, it should be categorical — either Mike or Mark — and not “both” – huwag gahaman, beki!) Feel free to explain your answer. Go!

Hi Migs,

I stumbled upon your site a few days ago and I haven’t been able to stop browsing since then. I would just like to share my story since tons of people have written you already I figured that I’d try it too haha.

I am an openly gay 20 year old nursing student and I would just like to share a little story that happened to me during the past year. I had this classmate back in 2007 when I was in 3rd year college and I had a crush on him. He was skinny, kinda nerdy and kept to himself. We eventually became friend’s coz we were always in the same group. Our surnames are near kasi and since we were spending lots of time together I eventually fell for him and I even told him how I felt. He said it was okay and that he was straight that’s why he can’t reciprocate my feelings, which was fine because I wasn’t expecting him to anyway. He also had a girlfriend back then which sucked big-time.

I wrote tons of poems about him and posted them on my multiply account knowing that he could read them didn’t bother me at all. He even commented on a few saying how touched he was etc. We texted each other all the time, chatted on ym till morning and even went out, just the two of us. He was the one who was asking me out to watch movies, I mean, what do you expect right? Of course I fell deeper. He knows how I feel about him yet he still does these things that make me feel like, him and I could be possible. I said “I love you“to him while we chatted or texted and he would say I love you back. This brought happiness to me and that is why I loved him more and more each day. We fought a few times about stupid stuff and he made a poem about me. He even used my middle name as the title. My girlfriends were so jealous of me. Sila daw never pa ginawan ng tula ng lalake tapos ako. Isang bakla. Ginagawan ng tula.

We had one major fight where I got jealous of his girlfriend and he got pissed at me. We didn’t talk for a week but he texted me eventually saying sorry kais he needed space daw. I mean.. HE NEEDS SPACE!? Haha! He said he was getting confused daw. Sometimes daw he file like we were doing things only a couple would do. And I got mad be because I NEVER assumed anything. I did love him more but I never told my friends na “oh my God parang kami” or something like that. I respected him. I didn’t even think about him sexually. All I wanted was to be with him all day. He and his gf broke up after a few months too.

We eventually made up and became friends again, and then my birthday came. I held a party at my house and I invited all my friend and him too. He didn’t greet me the entire morning which really got me down. Then at around 10pm a friend of mine came and said he had a surprise for me and there he was behind him. Holding a gift for me while holding is arms up. I was such a mess. I was so happy and I even said to him that this was my best birthday ever. Then a friend of mine started passing the mic around.

each person will describe me daw etc etc and he was the last one to speak. Everybody was silent and my parents were just inside the house so they could hear everything he said. He said thank you for bringing excitement to his life. I was the reason why he’s happy daw. I made him a better person daw. I opened up the world to him daw. I was crying so hard while hugging a friend of mine and he was crying too. I was just so happy to hear him say those things. He needed to go home eventually so he said goodbye, happy birthday, hugged me and kissed me on t he cheek then after that evening? Nothing. He never texted again. Ever. He never logged in his ym. It was like he disappeared. I was so depressed and confused. I refused to call or text him coz I felt like he made himself clear. I didn’t want to become desperate. I failed all my subjects after that. I was drinking everyday and never slept for 2 whole months. He buzzed my ym 5 months after my birthday asking how I was. He asked if he was the reason why I failed 4th year college. I asked him what happened and he said that he didn’t know how to begin again after what happened during my party. He broke my heart. This was the first time I fell in love and this is what I got.. It’s been 9 months now and I am still a wreck. I don’t know what to do anymore. He passed the board exams recently and I really felt shitty coz while I am still depressed its like nothing happened to him.. I feel really pathetic now and all I Want to do is forget him but it’s not easy.

Sorry for the long letter. I really tried to keep it short. I just wanted to ask your opinion about him, what I should do now and how to build up my world again. Thank you so much for taking time to hear my whining haha it really means a lot.

Thanks a bunch and God bless!

Jek

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Hi Jek,

I call your boy a “Wonder Boy” because he’s such a source of wonder for you — wonder because you love him, and wonder because you don’t understand him.

Alam mo Jek, we don’t need to fully understand someone to know what to do with them. Hindi na natin kailangan pang uriratin kung nabakla mo ba si Wonder Boy o hindi, kung minahal ka ba niya o hindi, kung ginamit, pinaglaruan, o binale wala ka niya. Hindi na importante ang mga katanungang iyon.

Tama na ang panahon, lakas, at luhang naibuhos mo para sa kanya. Marami ang nagmamahal sa iyo, ang kulang na lang ay mahalin mo ang sarili mo. Take charge of your life, hija. Oras na para ang bigyang pansin mo naman ay ang sarili mo. Bakla, anuman ang sabihin ng iba, maganda ka. Pero sa ngayon ay nakukulapulan ito ng kasawian kay Wonder Boy. Hayaan mong imbitahin kitang hubarin ang nakadagang pag-aalinlangan, at tuluyan mo nang kitilin ang pagnanasa mo sa kanya. Saka mo mauulinigan ang panaghoy ng sarili mong tinig. Ikaw muna, Jek. It’s your time. Give your beauty a chance to shine once more.

Bigyang pansin mo ang ganda mo. Ang edukasyon mo. Ang kinabukasan mo. At sa paraang ito, unti-unting kikinang muli ang alindog mo. Pasasaan ba’t may muling magpaparamdam sa iyo ng pagmamahal at pagkalinga? Basta’t huwag mong kakalimutan – maganda ka.

Yun lang.

Kumembot ka’t ngumiti,

Migs

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hi migs! Please help.

My best friend and i are both really hot guys (according to people)… We’re in great shape and straight. But we’ve started to have this weird attraction that both of us deny but we can’t seem to keep our hands off each other. Sometimes it gets sexual as we try to push each other’s limits, holding each other thighs jokingly. but we joke around talaga except what’s the line between joke o hindi?

– Ron Jr.

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Dear Ron Jr.,

Whatever line you’re talking about, you have clearly crossed it. You’re confused now because you want to know if your friend also has, at least in his mind. And if you have the assurance that he indeed has, then you’ll push further and enjoy the goods. Is this just about right?

To tell you the truth, Ron, this exact thing happened to me before. My friend and I would sleep together (no sex), hang-out all the time, drink, laugh, and sometimes play-wrestle (yes touching here and there).

And where are we now? Hello, I’m now the Manila Gay Guy. And the other guy? He is a very successful corporate guy, still quite a looker but no lovelife, no GF, and he still says he’s straight. We’re still good friends till now. The last time I saw him he was in a coffee shop hanging out with 2 gay guys. He says he’s just not homophobic, that’s all. Hmmm.

I’m not saying what happened to me is the exact same thing that will happen to you. In fact I’d wish yours would go more for the “happy ending.”

And bottomline: Keep it up, and let things flow. Exciting, isn’t it?

World Peace! Mwah!

Migs

A lot of MGG readers seem to be interested in sharing and reading about their “escapades” with supposedly straight men. Personally, it’s not my cup of tea, but if it is yours, who am I to stop you? I’m putting this post up as a placeholder for your stories, which as of late has been scattered in different posts. Enjoy sharing — and reading!